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I think my phone is haunted

Old 03-01-18, 10:57 AM
  #1  
jsharr
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I think my phone is haunted

It composed this text when I left the mic on when I was working on a spreadsheet. I did not speak and I was alone in my office. How do I drive the demons out of a Samsung S6 Active?

if they can hang there until 5 I can pick them up after work I'll go to bed with that figures invoice both do you want to do with you with food get Moorhead to Bologna 100 alarm to go and do we both need to know I am so why you were know your food were you while I usually I don't even know family you you anymore you live you awake away to do with other I can't imagine why do do with all your own room to try Northborough way to whenever you know we will all real thing other we're knew anyone and then building or Dakota why why don't you buy one with my girl you live with anybody gonna borrow broken to be with with a and with him from you by the way with wolf do with able to know where you want to go to awhile to know why you won't believe Movado where blue know you won't with gold why do they live like I'll rub women oh well I do with to wire won't you doing with wings Bolivar washer with homework those while with with work with when we were both were to go do we will do as were know what we were one their way you wouldn't volume the you be well I won't little you we were doing 200 with the weather we would you do with that thang through through that thang that dude that math and math math third bathroom through earth and math third third thing through a third you do have a a new
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 03-01-18, 11:09 AM
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Do you have some wood, a couple of goats, a machete, and some matches?
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Old 03-01-18, 12:12 PM
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How are you at skipping stones?
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Old 03-01-18, 12:17 PM
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Originally Posted by bigbenaugust View Post
Do you have some wood, a couple of goats, a machete, and some matches?
Luckily, today is Burnt Offerings day at the office, so yes, YES I do!
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 03-01-18, 12:19 PM
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Originally Posted by skijor View Post
How are you at skipping stones?
I rock at that.

I remember when rock was young
Me and Suzie had so much fun
Holding hands and skipping stones
Had an old gold Chevy and a place of my own
But the biggest kick I ever got
Was doing a thing called the Crocodile Rock
While the other kids were Rocking Round the Clock
We were hopping and bopping to the Crocodile Rock
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 03-01-18, 01:23 PM
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But...paper covers rock, rookie. It also disproves Spock
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Old 03-01-18, 04:37 PM
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It reads your mind. This is what your jumbled mind looks like.
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Originally Posted by making View Post
Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 03-01-18, 05:11 PM
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Are you sure you're not Windy?
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Old 03-01-18, 05:20 PM
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No, he's just Farty.
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Originally Posted by CarlJohnson View Post
i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 03-01-18, 08:56 PM
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Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
Luckily, today is Burnt Offerings day at the office, so yes, YES I do!
Then a man of your intelligence and stature should have no problem with this.

Burn the phone, then pawn the rest of the stuff to get a flip phone. Problem solved!
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Old 03-01-18, 09:29 PM
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He was probably predictive butt texting.
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Originally Posted by making View Post
Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 03-02-18, 11:59 AM
  #12  
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Run!
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Old 03-02-18, 12:16 PM
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Run!
That's only for grenades, and rabbits with vicious streaks. Phones don't explode...anymore.
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Old 03-02-18, 12:51 PM
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Originally Posted by Siu Blue Wind View Post
He was probably predictive butt texting.
I don't want to think about what his butt would predict!!
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