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Humorous encounters with the cops.

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Humorous encounters with the cops.

Old 10-18-08, 09:13 PM
  #51  
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When I was in high school my friends and I were bombing down this hill at 2am in a shopping cart we found on the side of the road. We thought it would be fun to use it as transportation, and my girlfriend at the time hopped in while the rest of us clung onto the sides after giving it a proper runnng start over the apex of the hill. A cop happened to see our litle escapade and decided to pull us over. While he did take the shopping cart, he was too amused to do anything beyond that (which is odd, because in that small town traffic infractions are their bread and butter).
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Old 10-18-08, 11:30 PM
  #52  
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Cycle cop ahead of me in bike lane, checking papers of two motocyclists he's pulled over. Cop has his back to me approaching him at about 25MPH on PCH with traffic. About 10 yds. from him I see a pc. of paper fly out of his hand, he bends over to pick it up (without looking over his shoulder) and I buzz by him - about 6 inches from his butt. I hear a "Wow" as I continue flying down the highway.

Close. Not sure how that one would have played out but, I think I would've got the worst of that one with the cop taking most/all the blame and a good ass-wuppin' to boot.
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Old 10-18-08, 11:40 PM
  #53  
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My friend in Vegas told me about an incident on the freeway. Cop pulls over a gangbanger kid. As the cop's walking up to the car, the kid jumps out and starts firing. The cop draws his gun and shoots back. They both empty their clips at each other and they both COMPLETELY MISS!!! Kid hops back in his car and takes off...
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Old 10-18-08, 11:41 PM
  #54  
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Y'all should hear some of the funny stories the cops tell about all of you!

Last edited by TexasKid; 10-19-08 at 12:02 AM.
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Old 10-18-08, 11:45 PM
  #55  
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Was driving south on the sacticose parkway in suffolk county Long Island and about a quarter of a mile back I see a cop pull out behind me and throw his lights on...I get off at the exit ramp and get back on going the other way and pass him in the opposite direction... He follows...so I get off at the next exit ramp (now with about a half of a mile lead) and get back on going in the original direction I was heading...I see his face bent in anger as I wave to him while we pass each other... he follows I get off at the exit ramp again ( same one I got off on the first time to turn around) and pull over behind the divider wall and watch him pass me and get back on going the other way.... I pull out and continue my original heading...
felt like I was in an episode of bug bunny
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Old 10-18-08, 11:53 PM
  #56  
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Is it true you can get a ticket for speeding on a bicycle?
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Old 10-18-08, 11:58 PM
  #57  
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When I was a kid we used to drink in local parks on weekend nights. The cops would come around and catch everyone and make them pour out their beer. They'd make people open up the trunk too and pour out all that beer. I suppose you could have tried to refuse them access to the trunk, but if you did that, they'd just go ahead and bust you for the drinking and possession, so everyone felt pouring out the beer wasn't so bad by comparison.

I simply took the trunk key off my key ring and kept it on a seperate ring under my front seat. When the cops would ask, "What's in the trunk?" I could reply that I had no idea since I didn't have a key - holding up my key ring to show just the ignition key. They fell for it every time.
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Old 10-19-08, 12:02 AM
  #58  
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Originally Posted by fuzzbox View Post
Is it true you can get a ticket for speeding on a bicycle?
Yes.

I got one for doing over 60 in a 50 zone.

We're talking kmh and not mph.

I think I still have the ticket buried somewhere.

Back in those same days I used to go out for a 40 mile ride on most nights after work and one cop took to stopping me every freaking night to ask me what I was doing...

My smart ass reply was always... "riding my bike"

He always wanted to know where I was going and could not wrap his head around the fact that I chose the wee hours to do some serious training... and could not understand that I wasn't really going anywhere except to make laps around the city I live in.

This went on long enough that I had to file a complaint for harassment (he would break up my pace) at which point his nightly stops...stopped.
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Old 10-19-08, 12:06 AM
  #59  
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When I was a kid, we used to ride those bikes with the banana seats, remember those? I was giving someone a ride on my back and a cop saw me. I got a ticket for "Pumping." I can't believe it to this day. He really should have found something better to do with his time.
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Old 10-19-08, 01:07 AM
  #60  
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Originally Posted by TexasKid View Post
Y'all should hear some of the funny stories the cops tell about all of you!
We have... it's on tv... a show called "Cops", and "America's dumbest criminals".
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Old 10-19-08, 01:35 AM
  #61  
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a year ago i beat up a 17 year old kid for throwing turpentine on my cadillac. the cops show up and arrest us both him for vandalism me for kicking his ass. at the station i was waiting for my ride when i ran into his parents who werent happy to see me getting released and were gonna press charges. some super there told them "he was lucky he only fell down some stairs"
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Old 10-19-08, 01:46 AM
  #62  
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I was driving back from a DH race in Gunnison (in which I did poorly) and was actually looking forward to the mountain pass ahead of me. On the way there it had been a great drive with very twisty corners, a challenge even at the speed limit. Once I hit the curves...I got stuck behind a slow driver doing half the limit. Grrr.

Since the road was so narrow I was stuck for miles, no passing lanes and by the time the road opened up, I was pissed. I passed at the first opportunity, and feeling I had "lost so much time", continued at an elevated speed. I came upon another slow driver in a campertop truck. When I went to pass it was clear, but just as I'd committed and was even with them, a car appeared in the oncoming lane! Wrenching the wheel hard, I squeaked by thinking that either I'd be hit by the oncoming car or clip the corner of the truck.

I was so embarrassed and shaken by nearly causing an accident that I punched it, putting as much distance between myself and the truck containing a driver surely wanting to strangle me for such reckless endangerment. Unfortunately, many miles down the road I was pulled over. Fortunately...I was let go with a warning.

The next day, all my troubles behind me and feeling pretty smug about getting away with it, I went to see the Parks and Recreation director about helping design the downhill course for our town. When I walked in, he said, "Did you get a ticket?". Dumbfounded, I asked how he knew I'd been pulled over. He said, "We passed you in our campertop pickup."
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Old 10-19-08, 02:38 PM
  #63  
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At the local football derby which always atracts bullies and drunks and there is always a fight before, during and after the match. I'm dragged there by a friend - an avid supporter of one of the teams. We are in the middle of the team supporters, on foot almost the entire time, everyone around me is eating sunflower seeds, spitting the leftovers around, obscene gesturing and cursing towards the opponent team's supporters. Your usual European hooligan football match. Suddenly a small bomb explodes on my feet. I should add that these bombs are usually made in some cellar from what we call minium (lead oxide) and bronze and when they explode they are pretty loud and leave an orange imprint on the hands or feet.
So... When the bomb explodes everyone runs up the stadium, so as not to be arrested by the policemen for throwing the bomb. I'm too bewildered to move and not knowing what to do in such situations and am the only one staying on the scene. So the policemen came and arrest me for... You guess throwing the bomb in my feet. The officer:
- You throw the bomb. Give me your passport.
- Officer am I so stupid to throw the bomb directly on my feet - and I show them my orange feet.
- No we'll arrest you.

Dumba***s
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Old 10-19-08, 07:29 PM
  #64  
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Not a driving cop story but:

I was young, about 14 and we had this County Sheriff from the next county that lived in our town of less than a 100. He was ok but we were the typical young punks.

Anyway he had done his fall cleanup of leaves and burnable trash and had made five or six trash fires ringing his property. Being local kids we wanted to stir up so excitement so we (about five of us) made a search at our own homes looking for spray cans of any type. Paint cans, hairspray, shaving cream, you name it our parents were missing plenty of cans this night.

We met back by the cops house and planned the party, it was about 2:00 A.M. when we burried the cans in the still glowing coals with the occasional tongues of fire licking the sky. We took our positions hiding in the surrounding redwood groves and bushes nestled in our town.

Some minutes later the cans started going off in this little town that is quiet as a tomb at night. After about two or three cans went off this Sheriff came out of his house waving his gun, looking for the perps (us). He was examining one of the fires when a can went off blowing ashes and sparks skyward scaring the crap out of him. He started yelling "I know you little rat *******s are out there and I am going to shoot the first one I see" at the top of his lungs. Just then a spray paint can went up, it must have been full because this was a monster bam. He ran around his yard looking for us for a good 1/2 hour. We stayed hidden and none of us got caught but we sure thought he was going to start shooting into the tree he was so angry.

Steven
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Old 10-20-08, 10:48 AM
  #65  
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I was driving home with my son one evening, unintentionally doing 41 in a 25 zone, when we saw a cop car parked just up the road. Sure enough, as we passed, he started up, turned our way and started with the lights. Pulled over at the first safe place to do so.

My son is developmentally delayed, and for some reason, as soon as we stopped, he actually opened his door and made to get out, before I stopped him and told him to stay in the car. Cops don't like that, I informed him, and went over the drill about what to do in a stop.

Typical exchange ensued when the cop approached our car:
License, registration, proof of insurance.
Yes sir.
Do you know why I pulled you over?
Was I going a bit fast?
Yes, do you know how fast?
No sir.
41.
Hmm, that's a bit too fast through here...
Do you know what the speed limit is here?
I think it's 25?
Yup.

But then it got good:
Cop: Hey, passenger, why did you try to get out of the car?
T (my son): ...
Me: T, you better answer the officer.
T: I was making sure my dad had his wallet. [WTF?!? ]
Cop: (Leaned over to get a better look at T, raised sunglasses) Uh... OK. Do you have ID?
T: No.
Me: This is my son, [name], he left his wallet at home and we have no picture ID in the car... would a driving permit log work for you?
Cop: Nevermind.

He went back to his car, checked things out, and let us off with only a verbal warning. I think the compltely nonsensical answer might have helped...
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Old 10-20-08, 06:33 PM
  #66  
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Originally Posted by CollectiveInk View Post
We have... it's on tv... a show called "Cops", and "America's dumbest criminals".
Not at all what I'm talking about. Besides, on those shows, the cops aren't sitting around talking about what a dumbass you are.
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Old 10-21-08, 11:59 AM
  #67  
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Back in the late 80s in my youth, me and buddies used to watch and sometimes participate in street races out and about the dark, industrial streets in and around Los Angeles, CA.

On night, I think it was in Carson or Cerritos the police came in force with three or four tow trucks and blocked all avenues of escape. Everyone was detained. I rode in with one friend's car which was basically stock except for being lowered and having a full HKS exhaust (Acura Integra). My buddy had a VERY low and Very modified '88 Toyota Supra Turbo. The police got everyone's keys together and said that they would pick three or four keys and those were the cars that were going to get towed everyone else would be let go with a warning. So my buddy with the Supra has this HUGE key ring with all sorts of keys and key fobs and stuff hanging off it. It was the first key they pulled out..."Oh, man, look at this, you're making this way too easy. C'mon do you really need all those keys..." My buddy is freaking out.

So the police end up giving him a break and picking some other keys, we end up getting off. Of course, before every one went took off, they cops popped hoods and wrote tickets on everything that was illegal. One guy had a cheater bottle in his glove box. The cop pulled it out and basically told everyone that the guy cheats. He wasn't too pleased about that.

Other than that, I got nothing.
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Old 10-21-08, 12:03 PM
  #68  
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Originally Posted by fuzzbox View Post
Is it true you can get a ticket for speeding on a bicycle?
I'd like to get one just to have it framed. I'd gladly pay the fine for those bragging rights.
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Old 10-21-08, 12:09 PM
  #69  
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I got pulled over for speeding in MI (construction zone = 45 at the time and they didn't sign them. I was from MN and didn't know, so I kept doing the last posted speed limit). When he turned on his lights behind me, I slammed on the brakes in a panic, layed rubbed, and he swerved onto the gravel, almost driving into the really steep ditch.

He wanted to check my trunk. I had a Fiero so when he saw the engine back there he said, "what is that?" I said, "the engine."

He was so confused that he just walked back to his car and drove away.

He was really young and embarrassed for asking what an engine was and almost driving into the ditch, I suppose? I got a laugh out of it and never broke the speed limit again in my life.
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Old 10-22-08, 09:47 AM
  #70  
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30 years ago, and I bet the cop is still laughing.
I was still in college, and my girlfriend lived about 40 miles away, so in the summer we saw each other only on the weekends. The being so, it meant the ther where a lot of built up "energy" for both of us.
Since we both still lived with our parents, it meant that we would have to find someplace to "park".
We found an empty park parking lot, with only one light, I parked as far away from the light as I could.
We got started, and soon my pants where down below my knees, since it was summer, I had on shorts. It didn't take much motion for them to slide all the way off, on the the floor. Thing really started to heat up when another car pulled into the parking lot, and parked under the light. Things came to a complete halt. We sat there not moving, looking at the car, waiting fo it to leave. The GF says "I think it's a cop". No why would he just be sitting there? Then the door opened, out stepped a man with a big maglite. GF "OH CRAP, I told you it was a cop!". Passion quickly became Panic. She grabs her pants and wiggles into them. I have to reach under the steering wheel to get mine off the floor. I grab them, and procede to jam BOTH feet into ONE of the legs of my shorts, OH S$%T came out in a little girl voice from my mouth. Then before I could get one leg out of my pants came the 'tap, tap,tap' on the glass. He was holding a badge, and shined the light into the car. Aimed directly into my lap, and the parts of me that where disapearing inside. I crank down the window with one hand, the other hand covering my shrinking manhood. Yes Officer? "May I see some ID?" Now my wallet in in my pants pocket, which is somewhere south of my knees, it requires both hands to retreive. "How old are you miss?" GF "19", "How old are you son" 19. He hands back the ID's and walks away, saying over his shoulder "Be gone in an hour", gets back to his car and drives away. AN HOUR, is he kidding me! We have a good laugh, and I put my pants back on. We are out of there in less than five minutes.
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Old 10-22-08, 09:55 AM
  #71  
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best ticket i ever got was "gross display of horsepower" for spinning all four tire on my stealth.


but the most aggravating, my buddy who is a cop was taking me home one night because I had a seizure at his place and was in no condition to ride my bike. We get my house and we get pulled over. the stress and the flashing lights cause me to have another seizure in the back seat. The cop pulls my buddy out of the car once my buddy shows him his badge. and tells him we basically got a "driving while black" and he pulled us because he thought we might be dealing drugs.
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Old 10-22-08, 10:25 AM
  #72  
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Here's one from the other side of the page.

While on patrol, things were getting kind of slow so my FTO (Field Training Officer) and I decided to park offset from a stop light where people are notorious for running the red. You would NOT believe how many people tromp on the gas when the light turns yellow. People would see us at the last minute, and you can see that they would freak out and change their mind, slamming on the brakes and skidding completely through the intersection. You should see their faces when they spot us. OMG, I wish I had a camera....

Anyway, one particular time this lady decides she's gonna hit it. She is NOT going to miss the light. She guns the motor, sees us, gives us this surprised "OH CRAP!!" look and then slams on the brakes. Her car hopped skipped skidded to a stop, almost all the way through the intersection. She, being the good citizen that she is, wants to rectify it and promptly puts the car into reverse. And while still looking at us mouthing "I'm sorry, I'm sorry" she hits a vehicle coming across. And because she is suddenly stopped, another vehicle hits HER as he's coming across. Apparently he thought that she was going to continue backward. The look on her face was priceless.

These were just fender benders and we were trying so hard not to laugh that we had to wait a while just to compose ourselves before we got out to the scene.
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Old 10-22-08, 11:51 AM
  #73  
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Oh crap. You're a cop Siu?
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Old 10-22-08, 11:53 AM
  #74  
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SIU'S A COP!?!?!?! CCCCCCCCRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPP


*sprints out door*
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Old 10-22-08, 12:01 PM
  #75  
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Originally Posted by Siu Blue Wind View Post
Here's one from the other side of the page.

While on patrol, things were getting kind of slow so my FTO (Field Training Officer) and I decided to park offset from a stop light where people are notorious for running the red. You would NOT believe how many people tromp on the gas when the light turns yellow. People would see us at the last minute, and you can see that they would freak out and change their mind, slamming on the brakes and skidding completely through the intersection. You should see their faces when they spot us. OMG, I wish I had a camera....

Anyway, one particular time this lady decides she's gonna hit it. She is NOT going to miss the light. She guns the motor, sees us, gives us this surprised "OH CRAP!!" look and then slams on the brakes. Her car hopped skipped skidded to a stop, almost all the way through the intersection. She, being the good citizen that she is, wants to rectify it and promptly puts the car into reverse. And while still looking at us mouthing "I'm sorry, I'm sorry" she hits a vehicle coming across. And because she is suddenly stopped, another vehicle hits HER as he's coming across. Apparently he thought that she was going to continue backward. The look on her face was priceless.

These were just fender benders and we were trying so hard not to laugh that we had to wait a while just to compose ourselves before we got out to the scene.
Woot woot!
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