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How much help does my friend want?

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How much help does my friend want?

Old 02-04-08, 04:10 AM
  #1  
Falchoon
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How much help does my friend want?

I have a female aquaintance (not really a friend as such, a male friend's ex-wife actually) who asked me if I knew of any jobs going of an admin type nature. I told her I'd let her know if I heard anything. A couple of weeks later I heard the office staff at work talking about needing a new phone receptionist. So I thought of my aquaintance (we'll call her Jane*) and asked the boss if they were hiring and if he might consider her. Get her to email a resume and I'll take a look he said. Sounds promising I thought so passed on the details.

A couple of weeks later a new phone receptionist started at work and it wasn't Jane. Oh well I thought, she mustn't of been suitable.

Bumped into Jane a few weeks later and asked her what happened about the job. She gave me a bit of a sob story about how her computer broke down blah blah blah and couldn't email or use the internet. Has she not got friends with internet connected computers (I would of let her use my computer) or know about public libraries that have free internet?

A similar thing happened a couple of months later and another similar job came up at work. I told Jane about it and gave her all the contact details again and once again she didn't apply, this time because she suddenly fell ill (too ill to use the computer or make a phone call?!).

Now a few months later my work are hiring again, slightly different job, probably more suited for her skills/qualifications. Supposedly they advertised in the newspaper on the weekend (I didn't buy the paper, this is just what the other staff told me). I emailed Jane on Friday to tell her to get the paper and look for the job. What company is it again she asked and can you help me get the job?

I am reluctant to go back to the boss a third time and say again "I know this girl (woman 45yo+) who is looking for work" as I reckon it makes me look bad when she continually fails to follow through. Do I need to get a copy of the newspaper add, scan it and email her the details and then write up an application letter? Am I being too harsh and she has just had a run of bad luck and should I be more tolerant and helpful?

I originally got my job through the help of a friend when I mentioned I was looking for one. My friend said go and see Mr X so I did and showed him my resume and told him what experience I had and the next day I was told I had the job. I did get the job on my merits, my friend just opened the door so to speak. He only told me once about it and I know he just told my boss something like "I know this guy that needs a job" because he didn't really know what experience or qualifications I had.

* not her real name
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Old 02-04-08, 04:40 AM
  #2  
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There probably does come a point where you have to sit with her and ask: Why (or why not)? It is going to make you look a bit silly if she reneges a third time. However, she may be going through some confidence issues which may be affecting her judgment of both her acquaintenceship with you and the job prospects.

If she is not that close in terms of friendship, just email the information (scan the job ad) and let it go at that.

Last edited by Rowan; 02-04-08 at 05:21 AM.
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Old 02-04-08, 05:17 AM
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Sounds like your friend has some personal problems to work out before getting a job. Not only that "can you help me get the job?" really irks me, go in and impress them, use you as a reference sure, but don't try and get you to sweet talk them into hiring her.

Sounds like she's the kind of person that doesn't really wanna do work for money. I've run into quite a few of those people, who sit around at work, get practically nothing done (but never get caught) and complain all the time about how boring or hard work is... you're bored because you're not DOING anything! I mean she's finding bloody excuses about sending an e-mail or making a phone call.... one! Not like a dozen, not like an hour of work, ONE e-mail or phone call.

I'd do it just because of the pushover I am, however I'd make it clear that I'll feel really put out if I did that and they didn't show up for an interview.
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Old 02-04-08, 06:32 AM
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Cut your losses. These "small" oversights may be a blessing. No doubt she will do something similar after she is hired on your recommendation .. then your name is sullied.

I hate that I just said that, but if it's closely related to corporate america, where you work, your word is your bond, for the most part.
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Old 02-04-08, 07:19 AM
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She's not in a place to look yet. It happens - you can pass her the info but don't stick your neck out.
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Old 02-04-08, 07:25 AM
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Twice burned, once learned. Quit lusting after your friend's ex - make her your ex as well.
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Old 02-04-08, 07:32 AM
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Originally Posted by FrankBattle View Post
No doubt she will do something similar after she is hired on your recommendation
I thought this would be the biggest risk too. It's even worse than her contacting OP and then not applying for the job.

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Old 02-04-08, 09:52 AM
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Sounds like she wants you to get the job for her and even then she will probably be 50/50 on whether or not she even shows up. Fahgettaboutit.
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Old 02-04-08, 10:14 AM
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You've done more than enough already.
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Old 02-04-08, 11:00 AM
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Originally Posted by StrangeWill View Post
Sounds like she's the kind of person that doesn't really wanna do work for money. I've run into quite a few of those people, who sit around at work, get practically nothing done (but never get caught) and complain all the time about how boring or hard work is... you're bored because you're not DOING anything! I mean she's finding bloody excuses about sending an e-mail or making a phone call.... one! Not like a dozen, not like an hour of work, ONE e-mail or phone call.
Originally Posted by FrankBattle View Post
Cut your losses. These "small" oversights may be a blessing. No doubt she will do something similar after she is hired on your recommendation .. then your name is sullied.

I hate that I just said that, but if it's closely related to corporate america, where you work, your word is your bond, for the most part.
+1 to both. BTW, you don't want to get a rep for recommending crappy employees even for the gov't. One of the most important things any organization does is hire people. Make a good call, and you are golden. You can pay the costs of a crappy hire for years in lost productivity, lower morale among everyone, and it tends to drive the good employees away.

At work, your name is as good as what you do and what you advise. Recommending someone you wouldn't want working for you is a bad idea.
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Old 02-04-08, 03:16 PM
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All you can do is open the door for her; she was to walk through it and it doesn't seem that she's willing to take even a step towards that end.

On top of that, will she pull the same crap if she's called for an interview and/or after she's hired?

I'd tell her about it again, without mentioning it to the boss. Ask her to cc you on the email so you can then alert the boss and "vouch" for her.
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Old 02-04-08, 03:26 PM
  #12  
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You might be better off wishing she'd never applied at your company. Give her the information for the job...after that it's upto her.
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