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Foo Writes a story

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Old 10-02-08, 08:27 AM
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ModoVincere
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Foo Writes a story

It's creative writing time. I'll write a sentence or 2, and the next person picks up the story and continues it.


Bob hung up the phone, smiling from ear to ear. The news that his new Surly had come in and was ready for him to pick up, along with the new panniers, lights, and fenders.
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Old 10-02-08, 08:40 AM
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This was the last piece of the puzzle. On his way to the LBS, he stopped by the courthouse to finish up his name-change from "Bob" to "Fred."
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Old 10-02-08, 08:45 AM
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The only question now was whether or not he was going to have to cut it into pieces to get it to fit into the panniers.
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Old 10-02-08, 08:48 AM
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All of a sudden, a duck flies out of the newly purchased panniers!
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A girl once asked me to give her twelve inches and make it hurt. I had to make love to her 3 times and then punch her in the nose.
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Old 10-02-08, 08:51 AM
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Suddenly Fred realizes he's hungry and thanks to the duck, all he can think of is duck a la orange for lunch. He looks around and spies the shotgun in the corner.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:00 AM
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As Fred squeezes the trigger, and just microseconds before the duck's brains get splattered all over the wall, the duck says, "
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Old 10-02-08, 09:02 AM
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The sight of the shotgun brought on a bout of severe depression. Bob picked up the gun and lovingly carressed it's butt stock as he wrapped his lips around the barrel. His toe sought out the trigger and as he flexed his calf, sweet relief entered his brain at over 1000 fps.
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:02 AM
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The End.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:05 AM
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So we can kill this thread huh? But the treadkiller thread seems to live on...
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Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
A girl once asked me to give her twelve inches and make it hurt. I had to make love to her 3 times and then punch her in the nose.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:08 AM
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Fred's cousin, sprockets, hears the noise and runs into the room, only to find a dead duck and a dead Fred lying next to a brand new Surly.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:09 AM
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...A Surly sonfabiatch, drunk, swearing to high heaven, and throwing punches at whatever happend to be nearby including himself...
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A girl once asked me to give her twelve inches and make it hurt. I had to make love to her 3 times and then punch her in the nose.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:10 AM
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The duck is framed for the murder, but since murder only applies to humans, he got off free.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:12 AM
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Suddenly, Detective Briscoe enters the room and catches Fred's cousin red-handed. "We've got you at the scene of the crime. We have the murder weapon. We can help you out now if you cooperate, but once the DA has it, there isn't much we can do."

Then, Jack McCoy makes a rare appearance at the police department to personally deliver the news. "I won't be happy until there's a needle in your arm, and I will do what it takes to make sure that happens."
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Old 10-02-08, 09:17 AM
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Fred's cousin, Doris, pulls up her sleeve to reveal half a lifetime of heroin addiction. "Do yer best, copper. Gimme a double."
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Old 10-02-08, 09:17 AM
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In that husky voice of his.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:17 AM
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Three years later, as he graduates from Nursing School, Jack McCoy glances in teh mirror. The determined face starts back at him and he must admit that white suits him.

Now all he has to do is find out whatever happened to Fred's cousin and who is primary care physcian is. After that, the little matter of getting a needle in his arm should be a piece of cake.
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:23 AM
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Chapter Two:
I am brought to the Day Room and meet a strange fellow patient
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Old 10-02-08, 09:28 AM
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"So, what are you in the Day Room for today mate?" I ask. It is only then that I notice the world's largest needle sticking out of his left arm.
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:41 AM
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He was hooked up to a coffee pot. He was too lazy to drink it, so he decided to take his coffee intravenously.
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What's frightening is how coherent Hickey was in posting that.
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Old 10-02-08, 09:44 AM
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WOOT!! All highed up on caffeine, Jack thought what fun it would be to jump up and down in his bed and he jumped and jumped and WEEEEEEEEeee---AAAAHHHHHHHhhhhhhhh ...hh....!!!!!!!!! - Jack jumped out of the window onto a ...
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Old 10-02-08, 09:57 AM
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Originally Posted by Hickeydog View Post
He was hooked up to a coffee pot. He was too lazy to drink it, so he decided to take his coffee intravenously.


(i printed this and have it taped to the wall by my desk here at work)
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A girl once asked me to give her twelve inches and make it hurt. I had to make love to her 3 times and then punch her in the nose.
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Old 10-02-08, 10:09 AM
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Originally Posted by Tude View Post
WOOT!! All highed up on caffeine, Jack thought what fun it would be to jump up and down in his bed and he jumped and jumped and WEEEEEEEEeee---AAAAHHHHHHHhhhhhhhh ...hh....!!!!!!!!! - Jack jumped out of the window onto a ...
..garbage truck heading straight for the dump. If he didn't get out fast, he was certainly on his way to being much more smelly than he was already. He had to think of a plan.
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Old 10-02-08, 10:17 AM
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Chapter Three:
My plans go awry, and I receive some startling news
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Old 10-02-08, 10:18 AM
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It was an attempt to stave off the effects of the impending zombie plague and apocalypse.
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Old 10-02-08, 10:28 AM
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But as I have no brain, I am basically zombie proof, so I ignored the news and turned back to the mass pablum that I call Foo. Cakes and Pies and Threadkillers beckoned to me with their lifted skirts and perfumed thighs.
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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