Go Back  Bike Forums > The Lounge > Foo
Reload this Page >

Receiving Compliments - strangers vs. S.O.

Notices
Foo Off-Topic chit chat with no general subject.

Receiving Compliments - strangers vs. S.O.

Old 06-09-09, 10:14 AM
  #1  
ManBearPig
1/2 man,1/2 bear,1/2 pig
Thread Starter
 
ManBearPig's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: .
Posts: 1,122

Bikes: .

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Receiving Compliments - strangers vs. S.O.

My GF always seems to dismiss my compliments for her. She can receive that same compliment from a friend or casual acquaintance and be much more flattered. The casual acquaintance is not necessarily a dude and not necessarily an overt "you look hot" compliment. It can be something simple, like "I really like your new glasses."

She explained to me that, while she appreciates compliments from me, they are sort of expected. She doesn't mean taken for granted. More along the lines of, of course your BF thinks you're pretty, your mom and dad think you're pretty, etc. Somehow, coming from someone outside that circle, perhaps the compliments seem more genuine to her? I dunno.

Can anyone (particularly the women) here relate?
__________________
...
ManBearPig is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 10:24 AM
  #2  
edbikebabe
runnin' down a dream
 
edbikebabe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Somewhere out there
Posts: 2,767

Bikes: Turner Flux, Orbea Onix Dama.

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Ummmm.... I kinda agree with her. But reading your perspective makes me feel kinda bad about feeling that way - or more specifically, brushing him off when he compliments me.

You've made me want to be a better person ManBearPig.
edbikebabe is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 10:26 AM
  #3  
TechKnowGN
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 1,266

Bikes: 2009 Fuji Newest 1.0, 2011 Trek 3900 Disc MTB

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
My fiancee does the same thing. Even though she says she loves the compliments from me, its obvious when i tell her one of my friends said she looks nice or someone else compliments her how much it does for her.
TechKnowGN is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 10:38 AM
  #4  
ManBearPig
1/2 man,1/2 bear,1/2 pig
Thread Starter
 
ManBearPig's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: .
Posts: 1,122

Bikes: .

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
I'm liking these responses so far -- this ties in w/what a friend opined too. Doesn't need constant affirmation from me because she already feels secure w/me. Good, good. Learning experience for me....
__________________
...
ManBearPig is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 10:45 AM
  #5  
Holly
Person of Interest
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: on top of the world
Posts: 575

Bikes: depends on the day

Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 27 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
That's good, but learn this then. Just because we don't need constant affirmation it doesn't mean that you should stop giving compliments. That would be bad.
Holly is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 10:49 AM
  #6  
edbikebabe
runnin' down a dream
 
edbikebabe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Somewhere out there
Posts: 2,767

Bikes: Turner Flux, Orbea Onix Dama.

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by Holly View Post
That's good, but learn this then. Just because we don't need constant affirmation it doesn't mean that you should stop giving compliments. That would be bad.
+1 - exactly what I was going to say.

The female is a complicated individual....
edbikebabe is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 10:58 AM
  #7  
ManBearPig
1/2 man,1/2 bear,1/2 pig
Thread Starter
 
ManBearPig's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: .
Posts: 1,122

Bikes: .

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by edbikebabe View Post
The female is a complicated individual....
This is something of an understatement. A woman has more complexity in one cubic inch than an entire 170-lb man has in his whole body.
__________________
...
ManBearPig is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 10:59 AM
  #8  
Wordbiker
Pwnerer
 
Wordbiker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,909
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
She dismisses your compliments because she knows you're only trying to get into her pants again.
__________________
Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
Ski, bike and wish I was gay.
Wordbiker is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:01 AM
  #9  
SaladShooter
Back in the Saddle Again
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Columbia, MD
Posts: 169

Bikes: '04 Kona Kikapu w/ tons of upgrades, in the market for a fitness roadie.

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
This is why I like to berate my SO at every opportunity. You know, just so she can appreciate a compliment every now and then.

Ah who am I kidding, I'm a softie.
SaladShooter is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:10 AM
  #10  
pgoat
Batw Griekgriek
 
pgoat's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: NYC - for the moment...
Posts: 2,911

Bikes: 1985 Trek 500, 1986 Trek 500 Tri Series, 2005 Cannondale R1000

Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 24 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by ManBearPig View Post
This is something of an understatement. A woman has more complexity in one cubic inch than an entire 170-lb man has in his whole body.
I disagree. I think it works both ways. I think most men wouldn't want their SO to take them for granted but would get an extra lift getting compliments from others - about anything (not just about looks, etc.)
__________________
Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
People whose sig line does not include a jsharr quote annoy me.
pgoat is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:18 AM
  #11  
austropithicus
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Mentioned: Post(s)
Tagged: Thread(s)
Quoted: Post(s)
Originally Posted by edbikebabe View Post
The female is a complicated individual....
In other words, women are bat-sh*t crazy.
 
Old 06-09-09, 11:19 AM
  #12  
skijor
on by
 
skijor's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 949

Bikes: Waterford RS-33, Salsa Vaya, Bacchetta Giro 20 ATT

Mentioned: 10 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 681 Post(s)
Liked 189 Times in 116 Posts
Originally Posted by Wordbiker View Post
She dismisses your compliments because she knows you're only trying to get into her pants again.
It's just that simple.
Mr. ber-subtle
skijor is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:25 AM
  #13  
SaladShooter
Back in the Saddle Again
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Columbia, MD
Posts: 169

Bikes: '04 Kona Kikapu w/ tons of upgrades, in the market for a fitness roadie.

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by austropithicus View Post
In other words, women are bat-sh*t crazy.
+1

It's why we love 'em.
SaladShooter is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:27 AM
  #14  
Holly
Person of Interest
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: on top of the world
Posts: 575

Bikes: depends on the day

Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 27 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by austropithicus View Post
In other words, women are bat-sh*t crazy.
Attention:

We women are sane, sensitive, kind, caring, loving and incredibly talented individuals and anyone that disagrees with me will have their asz handed to them by moi.
Holly is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:28 AM
  #15  
ModoVincere
Riding Heaven's Highways on the grand tour
 
ModoVincere's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,675
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by austropithicus View Post
In other words, women are bat-sh*t crazy.
Finally...the TRUTH has been spoken...we can shut down the interwebz now.
__________________
1 bronze, 0 silver, 1 gold
ModoVincere is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:30 AM
  #16  
jsharr
You Know!? For Kids!
 
jsharr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Just NW of Richardson Bike Mart
Posts: 6,166

Bikes: '05 Trek 1200 / '90 Trek 8000 / '? Falcon Europa

Mentioned: 11 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 32 Post(s)
Liked 6 Times in 6 Posts
Does this post make my butt look big?
__________________
Are you a registered member? Why not? Click here to register. It's free and only takes 27 seconds! Help out the forums, abide by our community guidelines.
Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
jsharr is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:30 AM
  #17  
Holly
Person of Interest
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: on top of the world
Posts: 575

Bikes: depends on the day

Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 27 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by Holly View Post
Attention:

We women are sane, sensitive, kind, caring, loving and incredibly talented individuals and anyone that disagrees with me will have their asz handed to them by moi.
Originally Posted by ModoVincere View Post
Finally...the TRUTH has been spoken...we can shut down the interwebz now.

Thanks MV!
Holly is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:35 AM
  #18  
thompsonpost
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Mentioned: Post(s)
Tagged: Thread(s)
Quoted: Post(s)
I think you should ask Dr. Drew.
 
Old 06-09-09, 11:39 AM
  #19  
pgoat
Batw Griekgriek
 
pgoat's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: NYC - for the moment...
Posts: 2,911

Bikes: 1985 Trek 500, 1986 Trek 500 Tri Series, 2005 Cannondale R1000

Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 24 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by thompsonpost View Post
I think you should ask Dr. Dre.
FiWA
__________________
Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
People whose sig line does not include a jsharr quote annoy me.
pgoat is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 11:44 AM
  #20  
thompsonpost
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Mentioned: Post(s)
Tagged: Thread(s)
Quoted: Post(s)
The fact that men think a wrench and a beer, or a pill, solves all problems could be a strike against you. Rise up, take the challenge.
 
Old 06-09-09, 12:17 PM
  #21  
pgoat
Batw Griekgriek
 
pgoat's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: NYC - for the moment...
Posts: 2,911

Bikes: 1985 Trek 500, 1986 Trek 500 Tri Series, 2005 Cannondale R1000

Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 24 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
Does this gold lame thong make my butt look big?
'd it for you
__________________
Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
People whose sig line does not include a jsharr quote annoy me.
pgoat is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 12:36 PM
  #22  
trsidn 
Jeff Vader
 
trsidn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Putting the 'fun' in dysfunctional
Posts: 383

Bikes: Cannondale CAAD8, Trek SU200

Mentioned: 3 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1044 Post(s)
Liked 13 Times in 13 Posts
Get used to it MBP. It will never be enough.

And remember it only takes one "aw ****" to wipe out a bunch of attaboys.
__________________
We are all a litter of piglets in the barn fire of life - Piney McKnuckle
trsidn is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 01:46 PM
  #23  
CbadRider
Senior Member
 
CbadRider's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: On the bridge with Picard
Posts: 5,935

Bikes: Specialized Allez, Specialized Sirrus

Mentioned: 3 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 16 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by ManBearPig View Post
She explained to me that, while she appreciates compliments from me, they are sort of expected. She doesn't mean taken for granted. More along the lines of, of course your BF thinks you're pretty, your mom and dad think you're pretty, etc. Somehow, coming from someone outside that circle, perhaps the compliments seem more genuine to her? I dunno.

Can anyone (particularly the women) here relate?
Of course you expect your SO to think you are pretty/smart/talented, but a compliment is a compliment. Since a lot of times people in a relationship tend to take each other for granted, I think it is nice when one goes out of their way to give a compliment. It means he actually noticed my new hairstyle, glasses, or whatever.
__________________
Originally Posted by Xerum 525 View Post
Now get on your cheap bike and give me a double century. You walking can of Crisco!!

Forum Guidelines *click here*
CbadRider is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 02:14 PM
  #24  
bigbenaugust 
always rides with luggage
 
bigbenaugust's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: KIGX
Posts: 2,110

Bikes: 2007 Trek SU100, 2009 Fantom CX, 2012 Fantom Cross Uno, Bakfiets

Mentioned: 3 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 272 Post(s)
Liked 17 Times in 14 Posts
Originally Posted by Holly View Post
Attention:

We women are sane, sensitive, kind, caring, loving and incredibly talented individuals and anyone that disagrees with me will have their asz handed to them by moi.
I don't think being crazy and all of this other stuff (except for sane) are mutually exclusive.
__________________
--Ben
2006 Trek SU100, 2009 Motobecane Fantom CX, 2011 Motobecane Fantom Cross Uno, and a Bakfiets
Previously: 2000 Trek 4500 (2000-2003), 2003 Novara Randonee (2003-2006), 2003 Giant Rainier (2003-2008), 2005 Xootr Swift (2005-2007), 2007 Nashbar 1x9 (2007-2011), 2011 Windsor Shetland (2011-2014), 2008 Citizen Folder (2015)
Non-Bike hardware: MX Linux / BunsenLabs Linux / Raspbian / Mac OS 10.6 / Android 7
bigbenaugust is offline  
Old 06-09-09, 02:18 PM
  #25  
CliftonGK1
Senior Member
 
CliftonGK1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Columbus, OH
Posts: 11,375

Bikes: '08 Surly Cross-Check, 2011 Redline Conquest Pro, 2012 Spesh FSR Comp EVO, 2015 Trek Domane 6.2 disc

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Originally Posted by thompsonpost View Post
The fact that men think a wrench and a beer, or a pill, solves all problems could be a strike against you.
Those 3 things can't solve all problems. Sometimes you need duct tape and a hammer, too.
__________________
"I feel like my world was classier before I found cyclocross."
- Mandi M.
CliftonGK1 is offline  

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information

Copyright 2018 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.