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work situation--confused.

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work situation--confused.

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Old 09-10-11, 10:09 PM
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work situation--confused.

So I need advice on how to take this. I am so confused. A few months ago I was assigned a boss that was pregnant. Basically since day one being assigned to her I got the vibe that I wasn't liked and throughout time I always got those snide remarks from her. Before she left I'm pretty sure she was trying to get me on the line to get terminated. Now she is back from maternity leave. Ever since she has been back she has be sucking up to me. I say that because I am getting the most special treatment out of our team. She's having me do things that look really good when it comes to getting a higher position. I feel like there is a trick behind this. I know her being pregnant had a lot to do with her attitude before but now she acts like she is going waaayyy out of her way and complimenting my improvement from before. Am I taking this the wrong way? Should I be happy and not worry about things? Bahh
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Old 09-10-11, 10:11 PM
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Does she treat any of your co-workers differently after returning from her pregnancy leave?
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Old 09-10-11, 10:28 PM
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She may have just realized she might have been a bit temperamental while pregnant and feels bad now. I think you probably can't help but notice the flip-flop behavior, but i'd try to just take it in stride.

I.e., head down and do your job. Of course, keep your eyes and ears open while doing so...
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Old 09-10-11, 10:36 PM
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Treat her with the courtesy that befits a boss and keep her at arms length. Don't chum up to her. People never change. You've already seen her dark side whatever would make you trust her now?

Are you taking this wrong? Do you have anything to worry about? I doubt it, she may actually be treating you nicer than she used to. Just keep her at arms length. She's already done you wrong.
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Old 09-10-11, 11:01 PM
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Act from the present, not the past. Maybe her body chemistry was screwed up, she took it out on you, and is overcompensating. Maybe not. Frankly it doesn't matter. Try to forget what happened and act as if you're starting with a clean slate. Just keep things professional and you'll be fine.
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Old 09-10-11, 11:55 PM
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Hormones from pregnancy can make people do weird things. I've seen some women get really grumpy and irritable, but then apologize later once they realized how not nice they were being at the time.

That said, I agree with others that say to go with the flow and do your job. If she's being nice to you now, that's great, but I wouldn't trust her too much or get chummy either. Perhaps she realized how nasty she was and then wondered if maybe the word got out. She could be acting nice to you in order to protect her reputation in the eyes of others. If she's giving you opportunities that will help you get promoted though, I'd go with it. Perhaps you can get promoted eventually and then get a different boss
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Old 09-11-11, 01:02 AM
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Perhaps becoming a parent has matured her and she's treating you now like she knows she should have before having a kid. I know it changed my life for the better and gave me a longer term perspective.
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Old 09-11-11, 01:36 AM
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As others have said, pregnant women are unpredictable, since their bodies are in a hormonal storm. Don't read too much into past behavior, and just slog on and do your job as best you can. You'll find she's less prone to mood swings due to hormones.....just remember that as sleep deprivation sets in due to childrearing demands, she'll get cranky again.
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Old 09-11-11, 05:53 AM
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On top of what others have already said, maybe your job performance has improved.
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Old 09-11-11, 06:06 AM
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It might be that she realizes how poorly she treated you and this is her way of apologizing. Some people are apologetic in indirect ways to save face [in their mind].
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Old 09-11-11, 07:31 AM
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I, too, would chalk up her prior behavior to being pregnant - think about spending your day at work with a basketball attached to your tummy, an aching back & legs, feet that swell up after a few hours... you'd probably be on the slightly grumpy side, too!
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Old 09-11-11, 10:47 AM
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Originally Posted by Excerpt from page 21 of "x136's Big Book of Dating"
But really, I agree with those who say keeping her at arm's length is probably your best bet. Maybe she has changed, maybe it was just the pregnancy getting the best of her, but who knows? Maybe she's as horrible a person as she once was, but is playing her cards closer to her chest.

She's given you reason to not trust her, so until you can determine whether or not her previous behavior was a fluke, there's no sense in setting yourself up to be cut down.
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Old 09-11-11, 01:27 PM
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Originally Posted by x136 View Post
Clearly you've not read it. That book is so full of truth bombs that I had to leave every odd-numbered page blank so that the reader could catch their breath. Thus there is no page 21.
It was all in vain, once it went to paperback.
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Old 09-11-11, 01:37 PM
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Did you sign the child support agreement prior to her change in attitude?
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Old 09-11-11, 03:04 PM
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I'd say keep your head down and do your job, but keep your options open (those tasks that make you look good allow mobility/promotion within your job) with regards to moving around within your organization and finding a new one in case she turns south on you again. I had a boss all over me for everything for a while and then he was nice to me for 9 months, rather than look around, I'd assumed things had just changed, and then I got 2 months notice my job was ending and I hadn't done anything to prepare to find something new. So I'd say be happy, do your job, but start preparing an escape hatch just in case. Or it could be you've just gotten that much better. Or the oxytocin she's now getting from feeding the baby makes her love everyone?
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Old 09-11-11, 03:39 PM
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Originally Posted by cranky old road View Post
Did you sign the child support agreement prior to her change in attitude?
Think Fussbox was working overtime with the boss,hmmmmm?
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Old 09-11-11, 04:01 PM
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Yeah, Fuzzbox's babyish looks reminds the boss of her baby so she's being nice. Still keep her at arms length but don't pass up any storytimes or any naptimes.
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Old 09-11-11, 08:15 PM
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Originally Posted by CbadRider View Post
Does she treat any of your co-workers differently after returning from her pregnancy leave?
Not that I have noticed, just me. One of the things I don't get is there are a few people on the team with better stats and have worked there longer than I have, but I am the chosen one. Someone on my team has brought this up with me about why I get to do what I am doing and my boss basically lied ha. My temp boss I had while she was out knew I didn't like her and I tried to see if I didn't have to be on her team again. Maybe the word got out, who knows. She always brings up the "past" with the new people saying how fun and relaxed she was and still is. So her perception is a bit off.
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Old 09-11-11, 08:54 PM
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Originally Posted by fuzzbox View Post
My temp boss I had while she was out knew I didn't like her and I tried to see if I didn't have to be on her team again. Maybe the word got out, who knows.
I'm guessing this could be it. Not necessarily a bad thing, just keep it professional and cordial at work, etc.
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Old 09-11-11, 10:17 PM
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I honestly don't care that it got out. I've told my previous bosses about it because she is the lowest rank at the center at least back then. I'm not sure about now and everyone I've spoke too doesnt like her either. So I really dont care if she knows haha.
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Old 09-12-11, 11:46 AM
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Often, when someone has a baby, their entire outlook on life changes. Mine certainly changed...for about 6 months, then it went back to normal. Be careful in a few more months and see what happens.
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Old 09-12-11, 06:55 PM
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This is her second kid so I don't think that is it.
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Old 09-12-11, 08:44 PM
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Maybe she's just batshizz crazy
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Old 09-12-11, 10:33 PM
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Originally Posted by pgoat View Post
Maybe she's just batshizz crazy
That's it.
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Old 09-13-11, 11:03 AM
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More and more, I am finding this can explain it all.
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