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Why do alot of women...?

Old 02-21-13, 12:56 PM
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Why do alot of women...?

I have been experiencing/noticing something lately, and I would talk to family and friends about it but I need an un-biased opinion. Why do alot of women prefer to only date musicians/guys in bands? I play guitar a little(I suuuccckkk), but im not in a band. I dont have the time, and I dont play it enough. I work a 9-5 job as a welder/process controls person, and I am also in school for engineering. So, my time is very limited to do my hobbies. When I have time, im doing my other hobbies(drag racing, motocross, cycling). I am 25 and I wake up at 5:30AM to go to work or school while everyone else my age that lives in my area, are still up, pissy drunk at some show at 3:00AM. I am into metal/hardcore, I know some girls that think im cute or whatever, but they most likely wont date me because im not in a band, nor am I popular. Its seems like its all about social status around here(I live in the city). I like making good money because I wasnt raised all that fortunate, and I decided at a young age that I dont want to live like that ever again. Hence the working alot and going to school. Not trying to compare but, I know some girls that date guys that still live with their parents, has a crappy job, and have no car. And yet, they date them because they are in a band! I dont understand. I LOVE music, but I do want to have a future, own a house, own my business, and have retirement one day(hopefully). I guess being "normal","boring", and "regular" is looked down upon. I wish I was "cool". I probably answered my own question.

Anyway, im done whining, and sorry for the long post.

Last edited by VeloNewbie; 02-21-13 at 01:01 PM. Reason: correction
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Old 02-21-13, 01:00 PM
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Maybe you are hanging out in places where those sort of women tend to go. Most of the women I know don't really care what you do as long as you are doing something with yourself, and that includes the 20-somethings.

If I were single, some of the socially oriented cycling groups I ride with would be great places to meet women. There's quite a few cuties on bikes.

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Old 02-21-13, 01:01 PM
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So these girls that are only dating musicians... where do you meet them? At bars and concerts? Maybe that's the issue.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:03 PM
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Some women date musicians and keep score. The only thing you will get out of these relationships is Crabs if you are lucky.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:06 PM
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Yeah, maybe it is where I meet them. I love going to shows and stuff with my friends. When I meet a new girl, ALMOST INSTANTLY, they ask me, "so are you a musician"? It drives me nuts! Not all are like that though.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:06 PM
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Haha!

Originally Posted by wulf View Post
some women date musicians and keep score. The only thing you will get out of these relationships is crabs if you are lucky.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:09 PM
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I've never dated a musician or a guy in a band. Neither has any of my friends. I'd guess it's where you meet them. Plus here's something, girls 'lust' bad boys.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:09 PM
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In my generation, a significant other that is trying to become successful in something other than entertainment, is a bad thing. Confusing
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Old 02-21-13, 01:12 PM
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This may be true. I still dont understand how being in a band is considered being a bad boy. I guess it is.

Originally Posted by MangoPumpkin View Post
I've never dated a musician or a guy in a band. Neither has any of my friends. I'd guess it's where you meet them. Plus here's something, girls 'lust' bad boys.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:14 PM
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Originally Posted by VeloNewbie View Post
In my generation, a significant other that is trying to become successful in something other than entertainment, is a bad thing. Confusing
I guess you'll have to trust me on this, but it eventually sorts itself out.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:19 PM
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Originally Posted by MangoPumpkin View Post
I've never dated a musician or a guy in a band. Neither has any of my friends. I'd guess it's where you meet them. Plus here's something, girls 'lust' bad boys.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:23 PM
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Originally Posted by TampaRaleigh View Post

Exactly!! LMAO. To me, drafting behind a city bus at 40mph would be considered more of a bad boy than a guy in a band.LOL
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Old 02-21-13, 01:38 PM
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Originally Posted by VeloNewbie View Post
This may be true. I still dont understand how being in a band is considered being a bad boy. I guess it is.
The 'groupies' and all the fawning. I can see some of the attraction, if the guy is hot and a nice person, but I wouldn't go out of my way to date someone in a band, just because they were. Maybe it's the hawt leather.
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Old 02-21-13, 01:50 PM
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Originally Posted by VeloNewbie View Post
I have been experiencing/noticing something lately, and I would talk to family and friends about it but I need an un-biased opinion. Why do alot of women prefer to only date musicians/guys in bands? I play guitar a little(I suuuccckkk), but im not in a band. I dont have the time, and I dont play it enough. I work a 9-5 job as a welder/process controls person, and I am also in school for engineering. So, my time is very limited to do my hobbies. When I have time, im doing my other hobbies(drag racing, motocross, cycling). I am 25 and I wake up at 5:30AM to go to work or school while everyone else my age that lives in my area, are still up, pissy drunk at some show at 3:00AM. I am into metal/hardcore, I know some girls that think im cute or whatever, but they most likely wont date me because im not in a band, nor am I popular. Its seems like its all about social status around here(I live in the city). I like making good money because I wasnt raised all that fortunate, and I decided at a young age that I dont want to live like that ever again. Hence the working alot and going to school. Not trying to compare but, I know some girls that date guys that still live with their parents, has a crappy job, and have no car. And yet, they date them because they are in a band! I dont understand. I LOVE music, but I do want to have a future, own a house, own my business, and have retirement one day(hopefully). I guess being "normal","boring", and "regular" is looked down upon. I wish I was "cool". I probably answered my own question.

Anyway, im done whining, and sorry for the long post.
Being "normal","boring", and "regular" is looked down upon, if your an attention *****. I know the type. I always compare them to the hippys of the 60s, once they found out that "peace and love" wasn't going to put food on the table they ran for the establishment. These girls will do the same, just be sure to steer clear of each and every one of them when they do as you'll be the "establishment" they'll be running for.
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Old 02-21-13, 02:04 PM
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Originally Posted by ilikebikes View Post
Being "normal","boring", and "regular" is looked down upon, if your an attention *****. I know the type. I always compare them to the hippys of the 60s, once they found out that "peace and love" wasn't going to put food on the table they ran for the establishment. These girls will do the same, just be sure to steer clear of each and every one of them when they do as you'll be the "establishment" they'll be running for.
Ex-wife #3 was an attention-ho. In the first year we were married she cheated 4 times. (That I know of.) We went through counseling and "renewed our vows"... 4 days later she ran off with an ex-con "roadie" because she was bored. She now lives in a camper trailer in the backyard of her boyfriend's mother's house. I'm glad I couldn't give her THAT kind of excitement.
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Old 02-21-13, 02:28 PM
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Originally Posted by VeloNewbie View Post
Exactly!! LMAO. To me, drafting behind a city bus at 40mph would be considered more of a bad boy than a guy in a band.LOL
Ummm.... that's not "bad", that's dumb.
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Old 02-21-13, 02:48 PM
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Originally Posted by ilikebikes View Post
Being "normal","boring", and "regular" is looked down upon, if your an attention *****. I know the type. I always compare them to the hippys of the 60s, once they found out that "peace and love" wasn't going to put food on the table they ran for the establishment. These girls will do the same, just be sure to steer clear of each and every one of them when they do as you'll be the "establishment" they'll be running for.
Exactly!
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Old 02-21-13, 02:55 PM
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I used to be in this band
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Old 02-21-13, 03:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Wulf View Post
Some women date musicians and keep score. The only thing you will get out of these relationships is Crabs if you are lucky.
And far more if he is unlucky.
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Old 02-21-13, 03:40 PM
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Originally Posted by VeloNewbie View Post
I have been experiencing/noticing something lately, and I would talk to family and friends about it but I need an un-biased opinion. Why do alot of women prefer to only date musicians/guys in bands? I play guitar a little(I suuuccckkk), but im not in a band. I dont have the time, and I dont play it enough. I work a 9-5 job as a welder/process controls person, and I am also in school for engineering. So, my time is very limited to do my hobbies. When I have time, im doing my other hobbies(drag racing, motocross, cycling). I am 25 and I wake up at 5:30AM to go to work or school while everyone else my age that lives in my area, are still up, pissy drunk at some show at 3:00AM. I am into metal/hardcore, I know some girls that think im cute or whatever, but they most likely wont date me because im not in a band, nor am I popular. Its seems like its all about social status around here(I live in the city). I like making good money because I wasnt raised all that fortunate, and I decided at a young age that I dont want to live like that ever again. Hence the working alot and going to school. Not trying to compare but, I know some girls that date guys that still live with their parents, has a crappy job, and have no car. And yet, they date them because they are in a band! I dont understand. I LOVE music, but I do want to have a future, own a house, own my business, and have retirement one day(hopefully). I guess being "normal","boring", and "regular" is looked down upon. I wish I was "cool". I probably answered my own question.

Anyway, im done whining, and sorry for the long post.
"Musicians" (the category) are interesting and/or exciting. Process controls/engineering is not exciting. While stability is important for many women, they will not be initially drawn in with the line "hey, I have a good job". What makes you different or more exciting than the 4 other guys that hit on her that night? What is going to draw them into a conversation and possibly a date? These are questions you need to answer for yourself and then present at the earliest opportunity. When they ask "are you a musician" you say "no, it interferes with my drag racing schedule.... but I do like to dabble with the guitar".
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Old 02-21-13, 03:43 PM
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If you are meeting women through a mutual interest (such as cycling?), then there is already a lot of common interest to talk about.
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Old 02-21-13, 04:00 PM
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As a guy who considers himself a decent musician (I play guitar, upright bass, mandolin, and a few other things), I generally see things a little different. I generally see women going after the hack that can throw together 4 or 5 chords on a guitar and sings whatever cheesy garbage they want to hear.


Don't women know upright bass is sexy?
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Old 02-21-13, 04:39 PM
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Originally Posted by 20grit View Post
As a guy who considers himself a decent musician (I play guitar, upright bass, mandolin, and a few other things), I generally see things a little different. I generally see women going after the hack that can throw together 4 or 5 chords on a guitar and sings whatever cheesy garbage they want to hear.


Don't women know upright bass is sexy?
I prefer delicious bass
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Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 02-21-13, 04:41 PM
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A lot of good comments here, but there is one thing that I don't think has been mentioned yet: time.

OP, between your work, school, and other pursuits, when will you have time to actually commit to the lady? Unless they are charging you by the half hour, I don't think any woman wants to feel like they are being 'penciled in' for a 15 minute slot between all of your other activities. The vast majority of women want to be 'romanced' and it sounds like you lack the time to do so.
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Old 02-21-13, 05:51 PM
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Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
I thought you looked familiar.




My daughter is 24 and has no interest in band members. If you're a master at Tekken, however, that's a different story.
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