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mmmm - not certain how I feel about this...

Old 01-30-14, 12:30 PM
  #1  
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mmmm - not certain how I feel about this...

My sister just called to let me know her eldest and his new bride are expecting. I was polite and all gushy on the outside but inside.... I have so many concerns.

This will be my eldest nephew's first. The boy (he's 29) has struggled alot in the past few years with alcohol and addiction. His father passed away due to an overdose and my Nephew sort of went ballistic and a bit crazy. He married his first wife just after his father died and that was a marriage doomed from the beginning (they were both drinkers who had alcoholic fathers). They divorce in 2012 and my nephew met his current wife and married in 2013.

My sister is so excited to be a grandmother but she has her own problems... =sigh= just wish the nephew had waited a year or two so this new marriage has a chance to get started (they married just this last September). On top of everything the nephew and his bride live next door to my sister and her new husband... they all live in the South so this is a white trash scenario destine for a reality show...
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Old 01-30-14, 12:39 PM
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Pam...I'm not trying to give you any advice here. Just tell you what I've done.
I don't talk to my sister at all. I don't talk to her kids. I have my reasons. And life is better for me now that I don't have contact.
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Old 01-30-14, 12:45 PM
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This will not end well.
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Old 01-30-14, 01:04 PM
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When in similar situations I always acknowledge the possibilities and then pray for the best.
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Old 01-30-14, 02:20 PM
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Thanks Modo - I am distance from my family for my own reasons... I used to be very close to my niece and nephews but because of my sister, I've lost touch. I do love the kids, demons and all...

NOS88 your advice is the best... I want to be happy for the couple and I will pray, hard, it all works out.
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Old 01-30-14, 02:55 PM
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I hope things work out for them... if for nothing else than peace of mind and happiness on your end.
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Old 01-30-14, 10:55 PM
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Chill out and don't be so judgmental.
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Old 01-30-14, 11:19 PM
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Originally Posted by SingingSabre View Post
Chill out and don't be so judgmental.
Isn't telling someone to not be judgmental contrary to your own advice? Or did I miss the sarcasm??

Pamestique, congrats to you and your family. Messed up parents have been raising kids since the dawn of time. As long as they don't drop them on their heads, I wouldn't worry too much. And who knows, maybe this will be motivation for your nephew to get his act together. But then again, maybe it'll be an emotional and financial burden that'll really release his inner demons. Glad to be of service!
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Old 02-02-14, 07:59 AM
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Originally Posted by ModoVincere View Post
Pam...I'm not trying to give you any advice here. Just tell you what I've done.
I don't talk to my sister at all. I don't talk to her kids. I have my reasons. And life is better for me now that I don't have contact.
This is the best advice, believe me, I have more than my fair share of dysfunctional relatives! I have tried every thing to help them and they've always ****ed me in the end. Staying far far away from them works out best for me and mine. When asked by other family members about the situation I reply in a strong voice, "They were dog **** on my shoe, so I wiped them off."
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Old 02-02-14, 08:02 AM
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Originally Posted by SingingSabre View Post
Chill out and don't be so judgmental.
and this ^^^^ is the worse advice EVER! as they will take you down with them first chance they get! The saying "misery loves company" is as true as any saying can get!
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You see, their morals, their code...it's a bad joke, dropped at the first sign of trouble. They're only as good as the world allows them to be. I'll show you. When the chips are down, these...These "civilized" people...they'll eat each other. See, I'm not a monster. I'm just ahead of the curve
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Old 02-02-14, 08:03 AM
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Originally Posted by NOS88 View Post
When in similar situations I always acknowledge the possibilities and then pray for the best.
Praying is like saying, "Sit back and do nothing." but if its what you believe knock yourself out.
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You see, their morals, their code...it's a bad joke, dropped at the first sign of trouble. They're only as good as the world allows them to be. I'll show you. When the chips are down, these...These "civilized" people...they'll eat each other. See, I'm not a monster. I'm just ahead of the curve
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Old 02-03-14, 07:02 AM
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Eh, at this point there's nothing you can do about it. Just be a supportive great aunt from a distance (maybe a safe summer away for just the kid when he/she gets older and needs it?) and hope/pray for the best.
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