Randombiker9

So bassically I know this sounds stupid but my mum doesn't want me to cycle on roads. I'm only allowed to ride in the park which I find is annoying as my friends are like we should bike ride together to college one morning or just ask me if I would like to cycle around town during holidays. So I miss out with my friends. I don't know why my mum doesn't let me. Because I'm 18 and when I was younger I was allowed to ride on the roads overseas. I know to obey road rules/signs and I've also been reading highway codes.
Anyway to convince her most of my route to college are parks anyway with a couple of roads. The only three reasons I can think of is:

1. Because I fell off my bike when I was younger
2. Because bikes get stolen quite often In my area
3. Because of the traffic and lots of buses.

She lets my brother ride his bike to Uni. But not me to college. How can I convince her? (because I can't just do it without her knowing because she'll find out)

jefnvk

I'd probably start with the part where you are (presumably, as I sense you are not from America) an adult with the freedom to make your own transit choices.

From there, if she has no problem with your brother doing so but not you, there is a family dynamic going on that we likely cannot comment on, as we don't know it. Only way to solve this is you talking to her.

CliffordK

Spend some time to plan a safe route using low traffic neighborhood streets, bike paths, streetside bike lanes, roads with wide shoulders, and other "safe" roads and present it to your mother.

Get a really good bike lock or two. In most places never leave the bike locked up overnight.

CliffordK

If the kid is living at parents house, then he has to abide by household rules. Plus it is always a good idea to appease parents.

jefnvk

I don't disagree, but a parent forbidding only one of their adult children from riding a bike on the road still goes back to some sort of family dynamic we are not privy to.

General Geoff

Solution is simple. Call her bluff, and if needed, move out.

My mom explicitly forbade me from owning a motorcycle, and I bought one anyway when I got a full-time job at the age of 19. I was fully prepared to move out, but she relented on her position. They ended up moving south and I bought the house from them the following year anyway, so it all worked out!

TimothyH

He should honor his mother and father and not insist on his own will.

Randombiker9

@jenfvk. I'm in UK and thanks @CliffordK thanks and yes it still live at my mum's house (My dad's fine with it but I hardly see him) it's just my mum that's not. I already have a bike lock (D lock) and even the bike racks around my town leave spare ones. Incase people forget there lock or to lock up with two locks. I've also been looking at cycle routes and rules and when I walk around and I have a look to see where I would have to ride in middle of road and when there's enough space to keep left.

kuroba

TIL that "college" and "university" are not the same thing

Randombiker9

Kuroba college is similar to University but the main different is Colleges don't have student accommodation whilst Universitys do.

CliffordK

I've never seen spare locks on a rack, although some regular commuters will leave their personal lock at the destination. I wouldn't trust someone else's lock.

What city? London is supposed to have good paths, but bad bike theft.

Some people use cheap battered, well used bikes for commuters

Randombiker9

I prefer not to reveal my location out but it sounds like a city and is more like a city but is actually a town if that makes sense.

Milton Keynes

Is she afraid you'll get hit by a car or what? If that's her main concern, tell her you'll get some bright neon yellow cycling shirts and make sure you have lights on your bike.

It's kind of silly having a mode of transportation but not being able to actually use it for transportation.

CliffordK

Perhaps bring Mom and her checkbook shopping for bike appropriate clothes, coats, and safety equipment. More than one set.

That will also get her involved with the endeavor.

Randombiker9

True good point. She hasn't cycled for ages due to not having helmet and her gears aren't working. She wants to though but says she never has the time to sort it out even though we have like 3 bike shops we can reach in less than 40 mins drive and one of them is just 10 mins away.

locolobo13 

Spare locks? How many people would have the key to these spare locks? Are they something you rent at the rack?

Don't know your situation. Is it safer to ride to the Uni? Is the route to the college really dangerous?

Sindy

Get her to watch this:

And tell her your that good, tell her you do this all the time.

Then get your own place If she forbids, girls like guys with their own place...

Gresp15C

I was going to chime in and suggest getting your mom interested in cycling herself, and then start riding to a few places around your home: Shops, the park, etc.

I suggest volunteering to get her bike working yourself. Getting the gears working on an otherwise decent bike is usually pretty easy. There's a lot of great tutorial information at the Park Tool website. And, get her a helmet. Whatever it takes, then she can ride with you and try out a few different routes to your college, gain familiarity and comfort with the whole idea.

CliffordK

I meant to get her to buy bright clothing for you!!

But it is a good idea to get both people involved.

CliffordK

I was wondering. Get a lock with two keys. Leave one key with the lock and wait for someone to lock their bike up with it

Some places do provide secure bike lockers, generally to rent. However a good lock is handy if one ever needs to park elsewhere.

Here, our university is in the middle of town with really good bike access and on-campus housing if one wishes.

The community college is on the other side of a big hill with primarily one, four-lane road getting to it, and no housing. I've done the hill a thousand times, and it isn't bad, but it does look daunting to the uninitiated.

I hope the OP's college has better access.

Chuck Naill

Ask her.


Children and not the same so that a parent might allow one to do something they would allow another child to do.


Please consider her concerns. She loves you and only wants your best.

mstateglfr 

- "Son, come work at the family general store this summer."
- "Dad, i want to spend the summer as a camp counselor to get some experience for later on as i want to become a teacher."
- "Absolutely not. You need to go to college and get a business degree so you can eventually take over the general store when i retire in 20 years."
- "Ok dad, i will ignore my interests and self-discovered talents and live the life you want for me."

Brilliant.***

jefnvk

Maybe I have no faith in humanity, but that was exactly what I though when I heard community use locks :/

Hardrock23

Have you tried sitting down with her and a map, to map out a route that she will feel comfortable with?
Or you can just ask her why.
Or watch some youtube videos and get her bike working again, get her a helmet, and ride the route to college with her so she can see how it is and see how you will do in traffic. This could also ease her mind about you going out riding with friends, maybe. It'll also give you two some bonding time.

Machka 

Um ...