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Please laugh with me, not at me

Old 10-28-21, 07:23 PM
  #1  
RidesaCarlton
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Please laugh with me, not at me

Two weeks ago, I picked up a bicycle out of a ditch.

I took it home fixed the flats, tightened the bottom bracket, loosened the cones on the front wheel, glued the saddle back together, oiled the poop out of every moving part, and then looked at it. It was a full suspension department store bike that cost $250 (to $400) when new. Then I decided to try riding it. What a letdown. Neither the front or rear suspension moved more than 1/4 of an inch. My 190 lbs (90 kg) was not enough to make it work. IMHO, they were not seized, they were not designed to move. I suspect the designers placed the suspension in the bike to make it appear better than it was. I am disappointed that any manufacturer would add a fashion option to a product that actually reduced the quality of the machine. I did not like the ride. I gave the bike to the 11 year old kid who lives next door. He seems very happy.

Hmmm, I'm thinking about my disappointment.
I think my disappointment with the bike is misplaced, and I pretty silly.
I literally picked it up out of the ditch. (I didn't get wet.)
I have no right to expect quality.
I did receive more value than I paid for. (I got a smile from a kid with no dollar outlay.)
I don't really have the right to be disappointed with the bike.
I think I have a right to be disappointed in the manufacturer.

I decided I will laugh about it, but I'm not sure if I'm laughing at myself, or with myself.
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Old 10-28-21, 07:43 PM
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I ditched a department store bike by the curb last week with a free sign. Was it purple?
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Old 10-28-21, 07:43 PM
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You're disappointed that your tender loving touch and miracle 'Open Heart Surgery' didn;t turn it into the "Magic Carpet Ride".
But likely is was at least good as new, prolly better...
'Suspension' is overrated ! LOL! when you look at the early video of the guys in NoCal riding their 1st gen MTBs...
The Kid next door had none of your expectations. He was stoked to get what is probably a pretty OK bike for his general use.
You prolly made a good friend!
I was thinking of my Grandfather's bike, when I came across your post. He bought it in 1939. I still have it. It's a very sturdy machine, Opa Fiets, perfectly suitable for what it was used for, and navigated the local streets of Belgian Block and outlying dirt roads with great aplomb - at speeds suitable for basic travel. I still ride it when I'm in Germany, at my family home.
Certainly not my Spec Tarmac, but it sure is fun to get about, with little concern for conditions or thoughts of bike malfunction, or worries about discomfort. A 10K ride goes by with me completly absorbed in the surroundings I'm riding through, waving and enjoying the day. Times flies when you're having fun! don't think I can remember that bike ever having a flat tire!
My guess is the kid is having the same experience.
Even though the tires currently on the bike are from the 1960's (and still in pliable, good shape). When not used the bike sits in a cool, dry storage room, neither too hot nor ever really cold.
You did good! And the result was the best outcome!
Ride On'
Yuri
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Old 10-28-21, 08:28 PM
  #4  
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Given the other bikes that you appear to own, I think you will get over this letdown fairly quickly.
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Old 10-28-21, 08:34 PM
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Originally Posted by RidesaCarlton View Post
...I gave the bike to the 11 year old kid who lives next door. He seems very happy...
BRAVO... Your a wiener... And the kid is ridding... Happy Happy, Joy Joy...
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Old 10-28-21, 09:40 PM
  #6  
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Bikes that suck, just suck, and manufacturers suck worse for slapping crap together that isn't meant to work just to make something look like what it isn't. As for the kid, as they say, ignorance is bliss. He doesn't know how badly it sucks and if it does all he needs it to do then its good enough for now. Experience tells us that it is heavy, slow, and will fail faster than something decent from frequent use. He doesn't know that and may never put it through the use that will cause failure and its still faster than walking. At least someone came out happier for it.
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Old 10-28-21, 10:03 PM
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Originally Posted by Russ Roth View Post
Bikes that suck, just suck, and manufacturers suck worse for slapping crap together that isn't meant to work just to make something look like what it isn't. As for the kid, as they say, ignorance is bliss. He doesn't know how badly it sucks and if it does all he needs it to do then its good enough for now. Experience tells us that it is heavy, slow, and will fail faster than something decent from frequent use. He doesn't know that and may never put it through the use that will cause failure and its still faster than walking. At least someone came out happier for it.
AND my 2002 bought in TARGET, $100.00 Magna 7speed with 1.25" fork travel and 1" seatpost travel with 15,000+ fun filled and abusive miles certainly sucks.
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Old 10-28-21, 10:10 PM
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Hey you got to play with a bike for awhile, not all bad.
Tim
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Old 10-28-21, 10:51 PM
  #9  
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I once had a department store bike stolen when I left it locked up to a town centre bike rack. The thieves cut through a D-Lock worth more than the bike to get it. #endofmycoolstory

Glad you got to hand it over and put a smile on somebody's face!
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Old 10-29-21, 04:27 AM
  #10  
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Here we go again. Again.
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Old 10-29-21, 06:54 AM
  #11  
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Originally Posted by RidesaCarlton View Post
Two weeks ago, I picked up a bicycle out of a ditch
good for you! you gave it new life & made a kid happy! I once did similar with an abandoned bike & left it at work so I could ride at lunchtime for a while. hate the idea of abandoned bikes rotting away. they made someone very happy the day they brought it home. gave it away for free to a grandmother in my town, for one of her grand kids that had their bike stolen & needed a bike. she was happy the day she brought it home too
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Old 10-29-21, 07:19 AM
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Originally Posted by rumrunn6 View Post
good for you! you gave it new life & made a kid happy!
Well, he made ONE kid happy. I’d imagine that the kid that left it in the ditch and came back to find his bike stolen probably wasn’t as happy…

Reminds me of a time in my distant past when I was a patrol deputy. We were doing a “bait bike” sting, by laying a bike on the ground, or up against a convenience store wall, and waiting for a thief to steal it. We would then do a “jump out” and arrest the suspect. Great fun, very rewarding. When our Sgt saw how many arrests we were making he was impressed. He asked where we got the bait bike from, and my shift partner said, “we found it up against the side of a building last weekend.

Last edited by sarhog; 10-29-21 at 07:24 AM.
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Old 10-29-21, 07:24 AM
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Originally Posted by cyclezen View Post
'Suspension' is overrated !
It certainly is on $250-400 department store bikes!
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Old 10-29-21, 07:26 AM
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Originally Posted by sarhog View Post
Well, he made ONE kid happy. I’d imagine that the kid that left it in the ditch and came back to find his bike stolen probably wasn’t as happy…Reminds me of a time in my distant past when I was a patrol deputy. We were doing a “bait bike” sting, by laying a bike on the ground, or up against a convenience store wall, and waiting for a thief to steal it. We would then do a “jump out” and arrest the suspect. Great fun, very rewarding. When our Sgt saw how many arrests we were making he was impressed. He asked where we got the bait bike from, and my shift partner said, “we found it up against the side of a building last weekend.
you arrest ppl for taking abandoned bikes? & you used an abandoned bike as bait? don't you have something better to do?
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Old 10-29-21, 07:28 AM
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Originally Posted by rumrunn6 View Post
you arrest ppl for taking abandoned bikes? & you used an abandoned bike as bait? don't you have something better to do?
If you ignore the fact that my shift partner “stole” the bike to begin with, it was a good op. The “bike thieves” as you might imagine, are also dope boys selling crack, burglarizing cars and homes, and otherwise terrorizing their poverty stricken hoods.
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Old 10-29-21, 07:34 AM
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Originally Posted by sarhog View Post
Well, he made ONE kid happy. I’d imagine that the kid that left it in the ditch and came back to find his bike stolen probably wasn’t as happy…

Reminds me of a time in my distant past when I was a patrol deputy. We were doing a “bait bike” sting, by laying a bike on the ground, or up against a convenience store wall, and waiting for a thief to steal it. We would then do a “jump out” and arrest the suspect. Great fun, very rewarding. When our Sgt saw how many arrests we were making he was impressed. He asked where we got the bait bike from, and my shift partner said, “we found it up against the side of a building last weekend.
I think there's quite a difference between a non-rideable bike with flat tyres obviously abandoned in a ditch (We call that illegal "fly-tipping" over here btw) and a fully functioning bike left outside a convenience store.
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Old 10-29-21, 07:56 AM
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Originally Posted by sarhog View Post
If you ignore the fact that my shift partner “stole” the bike to begin with, it was a good op. The “bike thieves” as you might imagine, are also dope boys selling crack, burglarizing cars and homes, and otherwise terrorizing their poverty stricken hoods.
People still smoke crack?
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Old 10-29-21, 08:20 AM
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Originally Posted by sarhog View Post
If you ignore the fact that my shift partner “stole” the bike to begin with, it was a good op. The “bike thieves” as you might imagine, are also dope boys selling crack, burglarizing cars and homes, and otherwise terrorizing their poverty stricken hoods.
OK, I hear ya, must be a tough job , just sounded funny
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Old 10-29-21, 08:25 AM
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Originally Posted by PeteHski View Post
I think there's quite a difference between a non-rideable bike with flat tyres obviously abandoned in a ditch (We call that illegal "fly-tipping" over here btw) and a fully functioning bike left outside a convenience store.
yeah I see bikes all the time & they are a head scratcher ... wutz going on? stolen & abandoned? left for anyone who wants it? truly abandoned? recently checked out a bike on a front lawn with a clear sign "FREE" but decided I didn't need a project. had my bike stolen, outside a pet shop, when I was a kid. Dad reported it stolen & we got a call from the police. went to ID it but didn't have the serial #. the officer asked me to describe it & I did & I also mentioned that I had a red bandana tied under the saddle. we went to check it out & the thief had ripped the bandanna off but left the knot still up under the saddle. the officer gave me back my bike w/ a smile. I think I started using a lock after that ... ;-) I guess the thief took it for a joy ride, abandoned it & the police took it back to the station? don't remember if they even told us how they found it
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Old 10-29-21, 08:29 AM
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Originally Posted by indyfabz View Post
Here we go again. Again.
lol wut else are we gonna do. clearly we're not out on our bikes ...
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Old 10-29-21, 01:45 PM
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Originally Posted by sarhog View Post
If you ignore the fact that my shift partner “stole” the bike to begin with, it was a good op. The “bike thieves” as you might imagine, are also dope boys selling crack, burglarizing cars and homes, and otherwise terrorizing their poverty stricken hoods.

That's a pretty big ignore for a lot of reasons. If you use an "abandoned" bike, how do you prove it wasn't the alleged thieve's bike and he was just taking it back?
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Old 10-29-21, 01:46 PM
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Originally Posted by indyfabz View Post
People still smoke crack?

If you brine it first, it stays very moist.
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Old 10-29-21, 03:27 PM
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Originally Posted by livedarklions View Post
That's a pretty big ignore for a lot of reasons. If you use an "abandoned" bike, how do you prove it wasn't the alleged thieve's bike and he was just taking it back?
Yes, the legal and ethical issues are what made it a humorous recollection.

Last edited by sarhog; 10-31-21 at 04:15 PM.
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Old 10-29-21, 04:25 PM
  #24  
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Good for you, a trifecta of good deeds:
1) Rescued a bike/Removed litter
2) Made a kid happy.
3) Set the kid up to be even happier when he upgrades to a better bike.
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Old 10-29-21, 04:37 PM
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Originally Posted by sarhog View Post
Reminds me of a time in my distant past when I was a patrol deputy. We were doing a “bait bike” sting, by laying a bike on the ground, or up against a convenience store wall, and waiting for a thief to steal it. We would then do a “jump out” and arrest the suspect. Great fun, very rewarding. When our Sgt saw how many arrests we were making he was impressed. He asked where we got the bait bike from, and my shift partner said, “we found it up against the side of a building last weekend.
Were they all crack dealers? None of them were poor kids who needed to get around?

Not really relevant, but mildly amusing. Back in the olden days of the 1990's my husband had a friend/boss, Trav, with -- interesting morals. He was walking down a street in -- Westood? North Hollywood? one of the richer areas of L.A. He saw a nice car with the keys in the ignition and decided he didn't want to walk anymore, so he got in and took off. A couple of days later the cops caught up with him and took the car back; the owner didn't press charges because Trav had had the car detailed while he had it. These things happened to Trav; he was an interesting man to know.

Looking back, it probably didn't hurt that he was white.
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