What to do when Significant Other Not Into Bikes?
#1
BEHOLD! THE MANTICORE!
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What to do when Significant Other Not Into Bikes?
My girlfriend of 9 months couldn't care less about bikes. While I don't expect her to become as fanatical as myself, I don't like that I am not able to share my main hobby and a big part of my life with her. She tolerates my hobby with no complaints, and has never even come close to scoffing at it. Honestly, I'm not even sure if she knows how to ride a bike. I try and explain to her the merits both as exercise and transportation (as we are both car free, and she obsesses over weight), but to little avail. The other day we saw a metallic green old beach cruiser and she said she would ride if she had a bike like that, I got so excited I almost tried to buy it off of the guy who was riding it! Have any of you had a partner who you wanted to share your love of bikes with? Any suggestions on how to do so?
#2
mechanically sound
Don't push the biking thing too much with her. It may have the opposite effect. Be thankful that she tolerates your hobby with no complaints. My wife has a bike and we occasionally ride together, but it's not the same as a real group ride, if you get my drift. (think: riding as slow as you possibly can)
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Tread carefully. Ultimately if she's into it you can help her, but in my opinion if you try to push her it will backfire.
I had a girlfriend that wanted to get into biking when she saw how much joy (and fitness) it brought me. I helped her in shopping and choosing a bike as well as starting to ride. She was doing great and even switched to clipless pedals. Then she had her first crash as pretty much everyone at that point does. It wasn't bad and she was even able to finish another 8-10 miles of riding that day, but she never rode again. I would surely enjoy riding with a significant other again, but also enjoy my time on my own. My advice is be careful what you wish for.
I had a girlfriend that wanted to get into biking when she saw how much joy (and fitness) it brought me. I helped her in shopping and choosing a bike as well as starting to ride. She was doing great and even switched to clipless pedals. Then she had her first crash as pretty much everyone at that point does. It wasn't bad and she was even able to finish another 8-10 miles of riding that day, but she never rode again. I would surely enjoy riding with a significant other again, but also enjoy my time on my own. My advice is be careful what you wish for.
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Sign up for a charity ride, somthing big like the Tour de Cure or maybe an M.S ride. Family friendly type stuff. She might catch the bug when she sees how fun this stuff can be.
#9
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Tread carefully. Ultimately if she's into it you can help her, but in my opinion if you try to push her it will backfire.
I had a girlfriend that wanted to get into biking when she saw how much joy (and fitness) it brought me. I helped her in shopping and choosing a bike as well as starting to ride. She was doing great and even switched to clipless pedals. Then she had her first crash as pretty much everyone at that point does. It wasn't bad and she was even able to finish another 8-10 miles of riding that day, but she never rode again. I would surely enjoy riding with a significant other again, but also enjoy my time on my own. My advice is be careful what you wish for.
I had a girlfriend that wanted to get into biking when she saw how much joy (and fitness) it brought me. I helped her in shopping and choosing a bike as well as starting to ride. She was doing great and even switched to clipless pedals. Then she had her first crash as pretty much everyone at that point does. It wasn't bad and she was even able to finish another 8-10 miles of riding that day, but she never rode again. I would surely enjoy riding with a significant other again, but also enjoy my time on my own. My advice is be careful what you wish for.
My wife followed this EXACT trajectory. Everything was all fine and good until clipless pedals. Now she won't even use the clipless when the bilke's on the trainer.
If she's not jumping in on her own, don't force it, but support her activities that you don't necessarily enjoy. Give and take
#10
Humvee of bikes =Worksman
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My girlfriend of 9 months couldn't care less about bikes. While I don't expect her to become as fanatical as myself, I don't like that I am not able to share my main hobby and a big part of my life with her. She tolerates my hobby with no complaints, and has never even come close to scoffing at it.
Why?
If GF isn't your friend enough to share your interest now she never will be. Move on.
Marry a friend but just "enjoy" a lover before moving on. You see if your mate isn't a friend there is
nothing left when the 'fun' stops. Believe it...............
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My preferred bicycle brand is.......WORKSMAN CYCLES
I dislike clipless pedals on any city bike since I feel they are unsafe.
Originally Posted by krazygluon
Steel: nearly a thousand years of metallurgical development
Aluminum: barely a hundred, which one would you rather have under your butt at 30mph?
My preferred bicycle brand is.......WORKSMAN CYCLES
I dislike clipless pedals on any city bike since I feel they are unsafe.
Originally Posted by krazygluon
Steel: nearly a thousand years of metallurgical development
Aluminum: barely a hundred, which one would you rather have under your butt at 30mph?
#11
Uber Goober
My wife bought a cruiser bike at Walmart, we rode around the block once, that was the end of it. If she's got the least weight problem and you have the least hills, that'll do her in unless she actually has some interest in it.
And don't go signing up for some 20 mile ride unless she's been riding quite a bit anyway. That's a good way to change her from "don't care about bikes" to "hate bikes".
Edit: My wife has never shared my hobbies- not a reason to change, though!
And don't go signing up for some 20 mile ride unless she's been riding quite a bit anyway. That's a good way to change her from "don't care about bikes" to "hate bikes".
Edit: My wife has never shared my hobbies- not a reason to change, though!
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"be careful this rando stuff is addictive and dan's the 'pusher'."
"be careful this rando stuff is addictive and dan's the 'pusher'."
#13
apocryphal sobriquet
You can't change your mate. And this is truth. You will never change her.
If you are willing to devote your life to something *she* loves to do, do you expect a tit-for-tat exchange? If so, you're a fool. Even if you could find someone with the same hobbies, who's to say that you two could get along besides the superficial cruft?
If you really like her, just be happy for that...
If you are willing to devote your life to something *she* loves to do, do you expect a tit-for-tat exchange? If so, you're a fool. Even if you could find someone with the same hobbies, who's to say that you two could get along besides the superficial cruft?
If you really like her, just be happy for that...
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Find something else you have in common, and enjoy that as your special time together.
Cycling is a bug, it's either you've got it or you don't.
Would you start making clothes together if your wife bought you a high-tech, top-of-the-line sewing machine?
(figuratively speaking of course nothing wrong with sewing )
.
Cycling is a bug, it's either you've got it or you don't.
Would you start making clothes together if your wife bought you a high-tech, top-of-the-line sewing machine?
(figuratively speaking of course nothing wrong with sewing )
.
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My wife has no interest in riding. She does like to go on a family ride like once a year.
I am perfectly fine with my ride time being me time.
However, I will see if I can get her to start riding short jaunts to baskin robbins with my son and I when it warms up. Maybe something will come of it. Maybe not. No issue either way.
I am perfectly fine with my ride time being me time.
However, I will see if I can get her to start riding short jaunts to baskin robbins with my son and I when it warms up. Maybe something will come of it. Maybe not. No issue either way.
#16
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i agree with nightshade on the "marry a friend" bit, but not necessarily with the "drop the gf" bit.
so what if she's not interested in biking? you can still have fun with her otherwise, eh?
my current gf can't ride with me. she's interested in it, but has a permanent shoulder problem that would cause her serious pain on a bike (at least with a standard flat bar handlebar setup). i'm not going to drop her because of it, though!
so what if she's not interested in biking? you can still have fun with her otherwise, eh?
my current gf can't ride with me. she's interested in it, but has a permanent shoulder problem that would cause her serious pain on a bike (at least with a standard flat bar handlebar setup). i'm not going to drop her because of it, though!
#17
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To get my cycling fix and not cut into family time, I started commuting. Perfect solution. It doesn't matter that my better half isn't into it like me. That doesn't mean we don't do some riding together.
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#18
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I could be golfing the 19th hole or chasing women. She counts her blessings.
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You are still in a position to do something about it. Is she a keeper? In spite of her non-cycling? Then live with it. It is not a deal breaker like you truly know you do not want to raise kids and she does.
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My wife has no interest in riding. She does like to go on a family ride like once a year.
I am perfectly fine with my ride time being me time.
However, I will see if I can get her to start riding short jaunts to baskin robbins with my son and I when it warms up. Maybe something will come of it. Maybe not. No issue either way.
I am perfectly fine with my ride time being me time.
However, I will see if I can get her to start riding short jaunts to baskin robbins with my son and I when it warms up. Maybe something will come of it. Maybe not. No issue either way.
#21
You gonna eat that?
#22
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i feel your pain, as my wife doesnt ride either and i have like 7 bikes in our house. not at, in. she puts up with my obsession an/or hobbie and i am thankfull for that.
#23
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Why not be happy with that? I think it's healthy to have separate interests.
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States I've ridden in: Illinois, Connecticut, Massachusetts, Pennsylvania, California, Nevada, Missouri, Colorado
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Even though there are different takes on this scenario, I think the responses here have more in common than any other topic I've read here on BF. Interesting.