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Is it just me? (a rant)

Old 10-27-10, 10:47 AM
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doc0c
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Is it just me? (a rant)

I've been on BF for a few weeks now due to my recent revelation to start bike-commuting to work. I'm doing this for a few reasons such as saving money, reducing stress, and for exercise. I've seen a bunch of posts already wherein some people find it amusing to attack someone's weight, as if the argument that "someone hasn't gotten off the couch in years" or "can't even see his toes" is valid in the discussion. The fact of the matter is that I personally find such posts insulting, not to my current condition which is entirely my fault, but to the fact that I am trying to change. The above comments were not directed at myself in any way, but it seems that if this attitude is present regarding anyone else, it would apply to me as well.
I would advise these BF contributors to find better arguments when trying to make a point against someone besides their physical condition. These taunts are childish and serve only to insult the other party and demonstrate the lack of depth of the poster.
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Old 10-27-10, 11:58 AM
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Hey -

I've only been a member here for a very short time, but I've been active on many an online forum... Words flow pretty freely from a keyboard, and you can't take any of this stuff seriously. From what I've seen so far, there are a ton of great people here who are willing to dispense valuable advice and help out the clueless (like me), but you are always going to have some friction, attitude, snarky comments, etc... on the interwebz.

If the comments weren't directed towards you, hell, even if they were - don't worry about them. People say stupid stuff when arguing, especially online.

Congrats for trying to exercise and lose weight - you are already ahead of many people in similar shoes.
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Old 10-27-10, 12:02 PM
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Well, I think you may be taking it a bit too personally. Yes, there are a lot of people here who dislike fat people, and you will find a lot of anti-fat sentiment. But if you are pedaling and trying to lose weight, it seems like there is a lot of support as well.

I think the bias is pointed more at the lethargic vidiotic - fast food culture that is packing the pounds on people. People here realize that it does take work to remain slim. But it also pays off in longevity.

Have you checked out the Clydesdale forum?
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Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
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Old 10-27-10, 12:23 PM
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Congrats for trying to exercise and lose weight - you are already ahead of many people in similar shoes.
Thank you, it's been a hard battle to get back to my former self and thankfully, I'm winning so far

Originally Posted by Artkansas View Post
Have you checked out the Clydesdale forum?
Yes I have, which is why I'm even more confused as to why these comments are made. When you make fun of somebody for being fat, you pretty make fun of everyone who is fat, regardless of intent. Again, I'm pretty thick skinned, but it rubs me the wrong way when it is used as an argument against someone's views/actions/words. I've seen variations of "that guy is a fat-a** so he has no clue about cycling/running/fill in the blank with an activity" when this can be very far from the truth and it is exemplified directly by the Clyde forum. Just doesn't make sense that we would "eat our own" so to speak by making general statements about someone's weight as it pertains to their outlook on life.

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Old 10-27-10, 01:14 PM
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I'm not unsympathetic to your plight--I've been as high as 280 pounds; now 240 at 6'4". And I've been both a pretty strong rider for my age and one of those gasping fatties you see wobbling along the shoulder, depending on my fitness level. Finally, I freely admit (in fact I insist) that road cycling produces more a-holes than any other activity with the possible exception of downhill skiing.
Having said all that, though: It isn't about you. It isn't about me. If you let other people define you, you're never going to be happy. Just go ride the bike.
It took me a long time to come to grips with this. I've been riding since college almost 40 years ago, and (because the technical aspects interest me), I know a fair amount about bike design, set-up, accessories etc. Just as an example, after using several clipless pedal/shoe combos, I've gone back to toe clips and straps on my main bike. It doesn't seem to slow me down, and I like being able to get off and walk when I want, or to ride in street shoes if I'm running down to 7-Eleven. Probably twice a week, somebody will come up next to me, compliment my bike, then tell me how much faster I'll be when I "upgrade to clipless pedals." I used to explain: Been there, done that, came back. Then they'd argue, and I'd argue, and it never went anywhere. Now I just say, "Yeah, I'm thinking about that" and ride on. Don't take anything personally.
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Old 10-27-10, 01:40 PM
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It is best to let idiots be idiots and ignore their sorry asses. The ignore function is there for a reason.
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Old 10-27-10, 02:04 PM
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You can't take this stuff personally. This is a free flowing Internet site where people can say whatever they want, however they want as long as they don't violate the forum rules. This is not a support forum such as a forum at somewhere like Weight Watchers or AA where people are sympathetic because they are going through the same thing. This is entertainment and for many of the posters here, giving you crap is entertainment for them.

The only advice I can give you is to develop some thicker skin or don't post anymore. I think we've all gotten the sharp end of the stick on here from time-to-time so we all understand, but complaining about it will really get you nowhere here.

I'm seriously trying to help here and not be a dick so please don't take it that way.
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Old 10-27-10, 02:49 PM
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BF is the most diverse online community based on a common interest I've ever seen. Yes we all ride, but you have people using cycling to try to get back to a level of fitness and people who've been racing their whole lives and anyone with a BMI over 20 is a fatty. You have people who are supportive and sympathetic and those whose favorite saying is HTFU.

You're not gonna change the dynamic; it's pretty firmly entrenched. The best thing to do is learn to filter out the stuff (and people) that annoy you. There is an Ignore function which I've used on the worst offenders. Eventually I've taken them all off Ignore, but when I see those posters I usually remember to take what they say with a grain of salt.

You can't control other people; you can only control how you react to them.
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Originally Posted by bragi "However, it's never a good idea to overgeneralize."
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Old 10-27-10, 06:01 PM
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Don't worry about it and do your own thing. We all know that some people like to act like clowns in front of a computer screen.
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Old 10-27-10, 06:08 PM
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My apologies for you having to deal with that.

Those kind of insults are against forum guildelines and I want to let you know that to the left and below the poster's avatar, there are three icons. The triangle one on the right is the "report post" button.

Keep in mind that any reports that are made are reviewed by the moderation staff and discussed in regards to the best way to handle the situation. All reports and reporters are kept confidential.

Please do not hesitate to use it for we want to insure that this forum is enjoyable for everyone.
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Originally Posted by making View Post
Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 10-27-10, 06:16 PM
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Whenever I see a fat person on a bike, I see that person the same way I see a smoker who has made the commitment to quit smoking. Basically, respect. I assume a lot of people are like me, at least I hope so.
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Old 10-27-10, 10:25 PM
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And yet... since I've started riding again, I've gotten fatter. Go figure.

Trying to get it back under control, and even with the extra weight I feel much healthier than last time I weighed this much, but still...
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Originally Posted by bragi "However, it's never a good idea to overgeneralize."
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Old 10-27-10, 10:33 PM
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You are riding. That's what counts.
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Old 10-28-10, 07:46 AM
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On the flip side, I find it incredulous when people use "Lance wannabes" as a reason not to support bicycling. And I'm talking in the press not just on-line. Like it's outrageous to want to be a little more fit.
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Old 10-29-10, 08:52 AM
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Thanks for all the replies everyone, and thanks to the forum moderator for bringing the reporting feature to my attention. To reinforce my original post, this was not something said about me or to me, but I've seen these type of comments more than three times in my short time here, so I wanted to find out if it was just me noticing the trend.
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Old 10-29-10, 09:03 AM
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Many people are ****** online. A couple here are also shown preferential treatment IMHO.
I was caught up in the game and eventually decided to act like a normal human being instead of some gigantic anal retentive internet tough guy.
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Old 10-29-10, 09:25 AM
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A lot of people get real brave when they don't have to look you in the eye. I spend more time reading than participating these days.
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Old 10-29-10, 12:04 PM
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There is a certain irony that in a thread about other people being insulting, those other people are called childish, have a lack of depth, are snarky, are stupid, are idiots with sorry asses, and are clowns and ******, etc.
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Old 10-29-10, 04:13 PM
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Oh delicious irony.
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Old 10-30-10, 03:21 AM
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Originally Posted by StephenH View Post
There is a certain irony that in a thread about other people being insulting, those other people are called childish, have a lack of depth, are snarky, are stupid, are idiots with sorry asses, and are clowns and ******, etc.
And then there are those who slam others who slam others. I guess we all have that old log and mote problem with our eyes.
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Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
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Old 10-30-10, 06:48 AM
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I feel that I come here to relax and enjoy myself after work. I don't come here to be attacked and made fun of. When things are no longer enjoyable I tend to stop doing those things. It is sad that some people feel the need to ridicule & put down other people but that seems to be the way of things. It is refreshing to see a lot of people that can disagree and share differences of opinion on things & engage in civil dialog, then there are simply some that can not.
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Old 10-30-10, 06:54 AM
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I think there is a lot more positive than negative on BF. We try to keep it civil with being over controling. Any problems, just report and or ignore the perp. Thanks and keep it up.
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Old 10-30-10, 06:25 PM
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I've been overweight. I still am, but not so much. I've been slow. I've ridden around on MUP's. Without a helmet. I've been ignorant about bicycling and am still learning. I've even been face-palmed. But I have to honestly say that I haven't felt insulted by any comments relating to fat, slow, MUP-riding, helmetless, or ignorant bicyclists.

My comment on the irony of the insulters being insulted wasn't intended as a criticism of that happening. What I was trying to do was to point out that there's a lot of everyday talk that goes on that could be taken as insulting or derogatory to one party or another if you really look at it closely, but we don't normally think anything about it and it's pretty meaningless. If someone cuts you off in traffic, you might say to yourself "That jerk!" or some equivalent. It's not your intent to categorically insult anyone that has ever done that (which most of us have at some point). And if I'm riding with you, and you say that, I'm not going to feel insulted just because I cut somebody off last week and fall in the same category.

I've learned not to take myself too seriously in some respects, and try to cut other people some slack, too. You might notice the "uber ******" over there in my forum title. I think I look okay when I'm just standing around or walking around. But when I see pictures of myself on my bike, I think, "Wow, I sure look stupid in that picture." Well, maybe I do, and if you point it out, it won't be anything I hadn't thought of. So I just stuck that on the forum title, and I'm going to keep riding my bike whether I look stupid or not. On another forum I visit, there's a guy with the forum name of "Fat Man on a Bike", and I expect he has a similar philosophy.

All in all, I've gotten a lot of good information, and more importantly, a lot of good entertainment, out of this forum. There's different people with different attitudes and different beliefs, and I generally don't worry about it, just mentally extract the good and go on.
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