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Cyclists are wussies!<rant>

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Old 12-05-04, 07:43 PM
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trekkie820
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Cyclists are wussies!<rant>

So, my roomate, in his cornfed farmboy hick-ass wisdom constantly makes fun of me calling me a wussie, pansy bike rider. I really don't care, but some of the things he says are just so full of BS its like I am swimming in it.

1. Called Tyler Hamilton a wimp, despite riding 20 days in the hardest athletic event on the earth with a broken collar bone. He said that it really wouldn't hurt because you don't use your upper body when you ride

2. Says that downhill mountain biking is easy, and any one could do it. Also said the same about XC, which is what I do, but to anyone who has tried either knows the score.

3. Apparently, we as cyclists don't suffer at all, and he always says this one: "You're just riding a bike, how hard can it be?" Since he drag races, I shoot right back at him: "You're just driving a car, how hard can it be?"

4. Says he intentionally swerves closer to us on the road.

5. Makes fun of every part of my riding eqipment, from my bike to the shoes that I wear, even my helmet.

So, as you can see, he is clearly a simple minded hick who has such a miserable existance. We took a class together last year, an intro to construction management, and I aced it, while he obviously failed, given that he is taking it over again, but lies about it because his pride gets in the way. He claims to be a hard-ass roughneck, bur his girlfriends push him around so bad it makes me sick. You should see the guy's bathroom, it looks like i live with a chick. So, if for some reason you get onto this page, I hope that when you go to hell, you be forced to ride a 45 pound Huffy up a 12% grade for an eternity.
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Old 12-05-04, 07:47 PM
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Hahaha...thats great. I have met people like that, although most don't call me a wussie
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Old 12-05-04, 07:54 PM
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Give him a chance to ride your bike and say here, ride it up (a big hill in your area) and then come back and call me a wimp.

I used to see champion downhillers training at my gym, and one of them would leg press like 800 lbs. And trust me, this guy did not use drugs.
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Old 12-05-04, 07:56 PM
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I tried that, he won't do it (remember, any wuss can do it). He is just a really insecure assh*le, and it is hilarious knowing how much smarter than him I am. The only thing he is good at is turning a wrench.
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Old 12-05-04, 08:06 PM
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Yeah I know guys like that. My room mates always thought I was a bit odd... especially when they came back from the bar and I was shaving my legs... but I digress. He sounds really insecure, and I'm guessing his manhood is really threatened by you in some way... probably because you regularly do something he could hardly do to save his life... ride a bike. I mean think about it, he needs a 1,000hp engine to go 1/4mi... you do it with two legs and no engine.
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Old 12-05-04, 10:04 PM
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Tell him you want him to run 5 miles with a backpack after you break his collar bone with a wrench. If he says no, call him a wuss.
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Old 12-05-04, 10:08 PM
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You should show them a New World Disorder film, that could change things quickly.
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Old 12-05-04, 10:51 PM
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When I started driving I used to actually ride closer to cyclists, then I realized how ****ing stupid I was being and stopped it and started respecting them.
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Old 12-05-04, 11:02 PM
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eh, don't sweat it. I get that all the time.

"ride a bike? I could do that!"
"50 miles is easy, I can do that on an exercise bike."

etc. etc.


Just ignore them.
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Old 12-05-04, 11:16 PM
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Man, if he's really harshing your mellow, you could always whip that a$$. I hate it, but sometimes it's the only way with these guys. I live in Tennessee, and work construction. I read books and I'm not into Nascar , talking about women's body parts or racist junk. So on a lot of construction sites, I'm considered weird, but sometimes I get greeted with outright hostility for being "different". Sometimes the only way to get piece of mind is to open that can, son. If it's the kind of ribbing you can just laugh off 'cuz the guy's just a P.O.S. that's great, but if it's really a burden to you and you have to LIVE with the gooch, then by all means, do yourself a favor and beat that a$$.
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Old 12-05-04, 11:24 PM
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Ignore him, except for #4 coz that's dangerous.

As for #5, let's face it, we do look like idiots.
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Old 12-05-04, 11:29 PM
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If people are asses, I usually don't care, but this guy seems to be a neverending ass, plus you have to live with him. In a situation like that, there's really only one thing to do: be a total ******* right back but (and here's the important part) act like you're being really nice and civilized when you do. For example: when he says he swerves towards cyclists, ask him in a very civil and polite tone if he does it because it lets him forget, if just for a second, that his life will never amount to anything. Then wait for a response. If he gets pissed or anything like that, tell him that he shouldn't get angry, it was an honest question. Act like you can't see anything wrong with what you asked, etc. People absolutely flip out when I do this to them for a while. Good stuff.

Oh, and if that doesn't work, remember: sucker punch to the throat beats rock, paper, AND scissors.
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Old 12-05-04, 11:34 PM
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He's just jealous because he doesn't have a hobby.
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Old 12-05-04, 11:45 PM
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I suggest track style sprints, one mile warm up with a quarter mile sprint. If he is to big a puss for doing it on a bike then windsprints, twenty yards, fifty reps.
If all else fails, weiner runoff.
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Old 12-05-04, 11:53 PM
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Originally Posted by Rev.Chuck
If all else fails, weiner runoff.

Even with having a concussion, that still sounds so wrong.
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Old 12-05-04, 11:54 PM
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Yikes...
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Old 12-06-04, 12:32 AM
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Everyone knows the guy that postures the most macho has got the tiny weiner. Have a qualified "judge" present if you are uncomfortable.
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Old 12-06-04, 12:50 AM
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All my friends think I'm wacko for riding as much as I do, but they all seem to admit that they couldn't do it themselves. I can't say I've ever been called a "wuss" or "lazy" though.
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Old 12-06-04, 02:56 AM
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I caught the old bag that lives in the unit at the start of the access driveway stuffing other people's letterboxes with wet, mushed up advertising catalogues.

When I challenged her, she called me a loser because I could never get off my bike. Usual perception where someone doesn't own a car, I suppose.

Bugged me a while, then I came to these forums and got "softened up". Now I get a bit of a laugh as I pass the unit and hiss at her stinking cat, scaring the living daylights out of it.

What goes around comes around, trekkie... as you get older you'll realise patience is a virtue.
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Old 12-06-04, 04:19 AM
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Originally Posted by trekkie820
1. Called Tyler Hamilton a wimp, despite riding 20 days in the hardest athletic event on the earth with a broken collar bone. He said that it really wouldn't hurt because you don't use your upper body when you ride

2. Says that downhill mountain biking is easy, and any one could do it. Also said the same about XC, which is what I do, but to anyone who has tried either knows the score.
Invite him to try it himself. When he refuses, give him a smug "what are you afraid off, pu$$y-cat?"

Originally Posted by trekkie820
3. Apparently, we as cyclists don't suffer at all, and he always says this one: "You're just riding a bike, how hard can it be?" Since he drag races, I shoot right back at him: "You're just driving a car, how hard can it be?"
If it's so "easy", he's welcome to join you.

Originally Posted by trekkie820
4. Says he intentionally swerves closer to us on the road.
I actually had a "friend" at university say the same thing to me about five years ago. I just told her I was in the habit of calling the cops on people who did that, and that they had taken action against them on more than one occasion. The subject was never brought up again.

Originally Posted by trekkie820
5. Makes fun of every part of my riding eqipment, from my bike to the shoes that I wear, even my helmet.
I'm guessing from the wording of this post, that he probably has an expanding waist line that you could make fun off. On second thought, don't bother, too much of a free kick.

Originally Posted by trekkie820
So, as you can see, he is clearly a simple minded hick who has such a miserable existance.
Yeah, I live in a city full of 'em. Your best bet is to just leave him to his miserable existence.
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Old 12-06-04, 05:20 AM
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It only matters if you are harboring thoughts that it might be true.

A year or so ago, I was on a ride in the country with another rider. We stopped at a bar for lunch. There were a good number of Harley Riders already there. They had the good taste not to comment on our shorts but did make reference to our bike's lack of engines. I told them that I figured Harley's were OK if you weren't man enough to make it go by yourself. Any of you guys even use kick starters? Since I'm writing this, you know that I didn't die that day and, believe it or not, we all got along fine after that.

Uh - there are lots of things that you can get away with when you're 60 that might land you in a hospital or in jail at 25. YMMV.
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Old 12-06-04, 07:01 AM
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I found that most of the people at my school have been just the opposite.

In my writing class, I go on a lot about cycling and most of the people there are genuinely interested and take time after class to ask me questions about it.

I also get stopped a lot on campus when I'm carrying my shoes and helmet and usually have a good conversation with those people. I've even been complimented on my bright blue water shoes that I wear instead of the road shoes.

Maybe it's because cycling isn't prevalent around here, and they're just curious. I dunno.
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Old 12-06-04, 07:42 AM
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Kill him in his sleep.
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Old 12-06-04, 08:29 AM
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Originally Posted by krispistoferson
Sometimes the only way to get piece of mind is to open that can, son.
That . . .is . . .HILARIOUS! Haha what a gret quote, I love it.
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Old 12-06-04, 08:37 AM
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Normally I'd say just ingnore him. Life is too short to go through it worrying about what everybody else thinks of you.

But since you have to live with him and see him everyday, it's a bit different. Especially if his intent isn't just to tease, but to bully. In that case I think it's better to be very verbally aggressive and insulting back to him. You don't have to be witty - just tell him to "Shut the f*** up". Nobody has to sit back and let someone else walk over them - life's too short for that, too.
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