HopliteGrad

Just got a bike from goodwill to save on gas money. I spent $5 bucks on it and it is a beauty, which is my problem. I don't have time for it to get stolen and I live in a high-theft area. So I'll lock it carefully and replace quick releases and such with bolts.

Users here have commented numerously that ugly bikes (seem to) get stolen less.

What are some good ways to uglify this thing real fast, real cheaply? Bonus points if it's fun.

Thanks and nice to find you all here on these forums.
Hop

kf5nd

paint it pink... maybe tempra paint which will wash off later

Newspaperguy

I've heard the reasoning about going with an ugly bike, but I don't like that course of action. A well-made bicycle should be a thing of beauty, even if it's just going to be your utility ride.

In your high-theft area, take the bike into your building with you. It will be safest there. When you're out, use a good quality lock, even if it means popping off the front wheel when you lock up. Also, if you have a quick release on the seat post, replace it with a bolt.

roccobike

Your concept is correct. I know guys who have made their bikes unattractive and it works.
You've already mentioned removing all QRs. Hobby shops have "fading" or "ageing" paint that is used to age box cars on model trains. It dries with a dull, speckled dirty appearance. OR, take some dirt, mix with a little water and rub it on with a damp sponge. It will dry dull. I know one guy that put bannana stickers from the bannanas he ate, on his bike. If you can obtain decal material put "Huffy" on it. You'd be surprized how knowledgable thieves are. Use a beater seat if you have one. Be sure to cover shiny chrome with a film of dirt.

HopliteGrad

Roccobike, that was the answer I was looking for. This article suggests some of the same things. Pretty useful. Thanks man

StephenH

My $100 mountain bike was stolen. So not all thieves are knowledgeable.

condiment

Bolt a flowerpot to the handlebars, plant a hardy annual. A ridiculously original addition like this will make it impossible for any theif to ride the bike without risking being caught by the cops or the owner of the bike, inhibiting any impulse they felt to steal your ride.

wahoonc

I think it depends on the location. Around here if it rolls it will get stolen, maybe not right away but sooner or later somebody will steal it. The flashier the more likely it is to get grabbed.

Aaron

donrhummy

Duct tape. Put it all over the bike and you're golden!

Roody

Mine too. And the thief left me a trade-in--an old Fuji in great shape that the fixies would pay good money for.

Nightshade

I agree but as a last resort nothing beats a can of flat black spray paint!

gerv 

Having a relatively cheap transportation bike is the only solution. It's probably a good idea to have 2 of them and not worry about uglifying them. With all the money you save using a bike, you should be well able to afford a $100 used bike every year or so.

wahoonc

That works...I have had small fleet of Huffy Baypoint 3 speeds that are basically disposable, paid $20 or less for them, put another $30-$50 into them for tires, tubes and possibly cables. Then usually add a Wald medium sized basket to the front. Still would get pissed if one got stolen tho.

Aaron

Dr.PooLittle

Just curious as to where the OP lives. . .

coldfeet

Cheap reflective tape, does double duty, any "Fred" style accessories that are uglyfying and useful,
rack, front basket, you know, anything that adds weight. Eventually, it'll look like my bike....

Artkansas 

Careful. He might think you want his bike.

Artkansas 

How about lumpy spackle. You can color it. Papier mache might be good too. Just remember to tear it not cut it if you want a smooth surface.

HopliteGrad

I live at a major university in Virginia. Not particularly dangerous, but definitely a lot of bike theft.

Alright, here's the roundup of what I have done so far, let me know what you think:
---Got an antiquing kit to make some spokes and other hardware look rusty
---Got some crap brown-colored "texture" spraypaint
---duct tape
---zip tied an old milk crate to the back rack
---replaced the seatpost QR with a bolt
---will hacksaw the full length grip shifter down to 1/3rd length and use some ghettotastic off-color handle for the rest

Probably overkill, but it's to the point where I'm having fun with it. Cause, you know, bikes are fun.

What are
?

Roody, that's crazy that the thief left you another bike. Crazy.

Roody

OP--are you majoring in theatre (set design)? Sounds like you would be a great propmaster.

HopliteGrad

Haha! Good call, Roody. I'm actually getting a degree in recreation ecology. I can say with some empirical backing that you mountain bikers, though you piss off hikers mightily, build the best trails of all. IMBA really has their stuff together.

Bdaisies

I like the idea of painting it pink. Maybe adding streamers.

You can also stencil your name or something else on it.

If you don't want to bother painting it at all, why not invest in another heavy duty lock, and just chain it somewhere very public.


/doh didn't read your last post. Ah well, carry on!

scattered73

Last week somebody dumped off an old cheap badly rusted bmx in our parking lot when they were dropping off some recycling in our recycling bins. At first we figured that they might comeback for it, until we went and got the bike, completely covered in rust, brakes were completely locked up, there wasn't an item on this bike that didn't need to be replaced (except maybe the seat post it actually looked ok). We brought the bike in our store for about a day to see if the owner would come back to retrieve it. Though like we figured he didn't come. So we put the bike outside on the bike rack with only a zip tie holding it to the rack. Just to see if it would get stolen and it did. Basically I don't think you can uglyify a bike to the point it wouldn't get stolen. This one was ugly and not functional and still stolen. Though to our surprise it lasted three days before getting stolen.

HopliteGrad

Perhaps the owner finally did reclaim it?

My ride is an old POS mongoose worth probably what I paid for it, but its utility value to me is much higher. So, I'm trying to widen the spread on the desirability on mine versus the nice roadie bikes on the rack I lock to. So far so good.

Hop

cutman

I think there's some truth to this.

I'd go with the Sheldon Brown approach. Get two locks of two different types: a solid U-lock and a cable with built-in lock. It takes two different tools to defeat this combination.

https://www.sheldonbrown.com/lock-strategy.html

HopliteGrad

I wonder if it's possible to uglify a bike with PANACHE! You know, the kind of job that makes observers think, "man, that is one fugly piece of crap, but at least the owner knows it..."