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What to do about well-meaning offers for rides?

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What to do about well-meaning offers for rides?

Old 08-28-12, 04:48 AM
  #26  
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Just start singing the wicked witch of the west song and maybe they'll want you to get wet.
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Old 08-28-12, 09:42 AM
  #27  
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I'm impressed by those who show such fortitude in riding in the rain. In our family, we could be accused of acting like we are "made of sugar": we generally avoid riding anywhere if there's more than a 20% chance of rain forecast. Being able to shrug off rain would make being "carfree" a lot easier, for sure!
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Old 08-28-12, 09:53 AM
  #28  
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Back when I used to ride a motorcycle, people used to offer me rides and ask if I was crazy for riding in the rain. I just told them it's not a Harley, riding it in the rain isn't a problem and that seemed to end the discussion.
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Old 08-28-12, 08:01 PM
  #29  
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Originally Posted by SlackerInc View Post
I'm impressed by those who show such fortitude in riding in the rain. In our family, we could be accused of acting like we are "made of sugar": we generally avoid riding anywhere if there's more than a 20% chance of rain forecast. Being able to shrug off rain would make being "carfree" a lot easier, for sure!
Depends on where you are. Around here riding in the rain is likely and a good chance to skip out on the weekly shower

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Old 08-29-12, 05:08 PM
  #30  
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This is more of a touring story but has a car-free theme. My most memorable offer of a ride was on our cross-country honeymoon cycle tour from Los Angeles to Washington DC. We are originally from Michigan, and the first week riding across California included the first mountain passes we had ever encountered. We stayed one night in Bullhead City, AZ in the Colorado River valley, and the next day faced a long climb out of the valley to Kingman, AZ. A guy in a pick-up truck offered us a lift up the pass and we briefly discussed it. We both agreed that if we accepted a ride so early in the trip, we may succumb to further offers in other difficult segments. So we declined and could afterwards boast that we (exclusively) cycled across the country.
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Old 08-29-12, 07:04 PM
  #31  
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Originally Posted by Jim from Boston View Post
This is more of a touring story but has a car-free theme. My most memorable offer of a ride was on our cross-country honeymoon cycle tour from Los Angeles to Washington DC. We are originally from Michigan, and the first week riding across California included the first mountain passes we had ever encountered. We stayed one night in Bullhead City, AZ in the Colorado River valley, and the next day faced a long climb out of the valley to Kingman, AZ. A guy in a pick-up truck offered us a lift up the pass and we briefly discussed it. We both agreed that if we accepted a ride so early in the trip, we may succumb to further offers in other difficult segments. So we declined and could afterwards boast that we (exclusively) cycled across the country.
And boast you should. Way to go!
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Old 08-29-12, 09:57 PM
  #32  
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Originally Posted by cycleobsidian View Post
And boast you should. Way to go!
Originally Posted by Jim from Boston View Post
...We are originally from Michigan, and the first week riding across California included the first mountain passes we had ever encountered...
Thanks for the comment. I noted that all our previous cycle touring had been in Michigan, mainly the Southeast, as far north as the Thumb area, flat to slightly hilly. I note that you post from southwestern Ontario. We also did a couple of tours there in similar terrain: from Detroit to Kitchener via Windsor; and from Detroit to Sudbury via Sarnia, the Lake Huron coastline, to the Bruce peninsula, and on to Sudbury, where we caught a train to Toronto. Both also memorable, as all our tours have been.
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Old 08-30-12, 08:33 AM
  #33  
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Originally Posted by cycleobsidian View Post
And boast you should. Way to go!
Agreed--impressive! No way would I ever remotely be able to manage something like that.
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Old 09-29-12, 09:18 AM
  #34  
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"I live in New Mexico...getting rained on is a privilege, and a rare one. "
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Old 10-05-12, 09:53 AM
  #35  
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"If I wanted a ride home, why would I not just drive my car here in the first place" is usually what I say.. I know the offer is meant well, but I take offense as its almost like I'm being pitied for doing something I love.

Usually those who offer the ride are the people who are easily astonished, "you rode all the way here from there??? Wow!!" after learning I rode maybe 5 to 10km.
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Old 10-08-12, 02:45 AM
  #36  
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That wouldn't fit in my wife's case as we don't have a car, and we actually would have one if we could afford it (although she would still bike to work when the weather is nice). So you're right, there is pity involved but we are not in a position to dismiss their sense of pity although it is embarrassing.
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Old 10-08-12, 08:38 AM
  #37  
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Originally Posted by SlackerInc
That wouldn't fit in my wife's case as we don't have a car, and we actually would have one if we could afford it (although she would still bike to work when the weather is nice). So you're right, there is pity involved but we are not in a position to dismiss their sense of pity although it is embarrassing.
Why is it embarrassing that you refuse to go into debt for something you don't really need? That sounds wise and thoughtful to me. Enjoy life and don't worry about it. Change the subject when it comes to rides. When asked what I'll do when it rains (which it already has), I just smile and say I'll get wet... and then talk about something else. If you don't want the ride, just say so and move on. They're just trying to be thoughtful, even if they don't realize that you're OK (and better than OK) without riding in a car every day.
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Old 10-13-12, 06:15 PM
  #38  
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Nothing wrong with taking a ride as long it is not out of their way and they are going as well. It is called carpooling and if everyone did it there would be a lot less cars on the road. Efficiency beats out the cars vs bikes debate any day. I mean if you can bike a few miles and meet up with a coworker for the rest of the trip then there is no foul, just don't have them going too far out of their way to pick you up.
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Old 10-14-12, 06:08 AM
  #39  
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Originally Posted by SlackerInc View Post
I'm impressed by those who show such fortitude in riding in the rain. In our family, we could be accused of acting like we are "made of sugar": we generally avoid riding anywhere if there's more than a 20% chance of rain forecast. Being able to shrug off rain would make being "carfree" a lot easier, for sure!

I can't believe the difference good rain gear makes. I don't mind commuting in the rain anymore. (Really, it's true!)

Originally Posted by chgurlsng View Post
Why is it embarrassing that you refuse to go into debt for something you don't really need? That sounds wise and thoughtful to me. Enjoy life and don't worry about it. Change the subject when it comes to rides. When asked what I'll do when it rains (which it already has), I just smile and say I'll get wet... and then talk about something else. If you don't want the ride, just say so and move on. They're just trying to be thoughtful, even if they don't realize that you're OK (and better than OK) without riding in a car every day.

Very well said.
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Old 10-14-12, 10:57 PM
  #40  
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Originally Posted by SlackerInc View Post
My wife just started a job teaching elementary school. She bikes to school when it is dry and takes the bus when it's rainy out. She emailed me today the following dilemma (slightly redacted to preserve anonymity):



I can't think of any non-awkward way for her to deal with this without her feeling mortified or causing ruffled feathers. Any ideas?
I would think a simple "No thank you, I'm doing fine" would be sufficient. I got this a lot when I first started going most places without a car, and, once people realized that it wasn't poverty or insanity, but merely a personal choice, they were OK with it. They weren't being judgmental; they merely wanted to help, and once they realized that I was actually making it to appointments on time and I was very happy, they let it go.
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Old 10-15-12, 02:16 AM
  #41  
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Hmm...I've been offered rides before. I just say no thanks with a smile. That is often followed by "how do you do it?". People around me seem more envious than anything. A couple of friends of mine want to use a bicycle to get around but they A) just don't think they can physically do it or B) are afraid of facing car traffic on a bicycle.

I'd just not make a huge deal about it. Just a simple no thanks seems to go over fine.
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Old 10-15-12, 05:56 AM
  #42  
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Originally Posted by Vekta408 View Post
I'd just not make a huge deal about it. Just a simple no thanks seems to go over fine.
Sometimes I might add, "Sorry no... I was looking forward to a ride home."

Maybe you could convince them to ditch the car and ride home with you....
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Old 10-15-12, 08:38 AM
  #43  
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Originally Posted by bragi View Post
I got this a lot when I first started going most places without a car, and, once people realized that it wasn't poverty or insanity, but merely a personal choice, they were OK with it.
But see, you inadvertently illustrated part of the problem: it is poverty, in part (though not insanity, heh). We would have a car if we could afford one. That we can't is humiliating for my wife and the pitying offers of rides just increase her embarrassment (she is an introverted person with a lot of pride who feels more discomfort than most people would when she feels pitied).

Originally Posted by yellowsirocco View Post
Nothing wrong with taking a ride as long it is not out of their way and they are going as well. It is called carpooling and if everyone did it there would be a lot less cars on the road. Efficiency beats out the cars vs bikes debate any day. I mean if you can bike a few miles and meet up with a coworker for the rest of the trip then there is no foul, just don't have them going too far out of their way to pick you up.
I think this is a good point and if it were me it's the way I would probably lean. Hard to imagine it would be too terribly far out of the way for any of her coworkers, as the total distance from our house to the school where she works is only about a mile and a half. But as noted above, with my wife's personality this would be torture for her: avoiding "awkward" situations is a constant goal. (I know she should "shrug it off" or whatever, but if you know anyone who is very introverted and easily embarrassed, you know how that is much easier said than done for such people.)

It seems like the interest/concern has died down for now, but when it gets cold and snowy it's probably going to rise anew...
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Old 10-22-12, 03:37 AM
  #44  
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a few weeks ago the rain started coming down in buckets, while i was out. some friends offered to give me and my bike a ride home in their van. i said, "what?!?! i didn't spend all this money on rain-gear so i can ride home in the van!"

by the time i was ready to leave, it stopped raining... and it was a beautiful night for a ride!
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Old 10-22-12, 08:07 PM
  #45  
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I get the OP's position, and this response doesn't really apply, but when I get asked if I want a ride, and it's always friends, I just say, "Thanks, but then I wouldn't get to ride." Or, "Thanks, but then I wouldn't get to run." (I started alternating running to work with riding my bike.)
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