When and how do you let one go?
11-13-15, 09:42 AM
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When and how do you let one go?
When you're in the saddle, and have to fart, how do you do it?
Do you lift? Lean? Stay seated and fire out a squeaker? Flatulence before a break-away for a competitive advantage? Let out an SBD and blame the rider in front? Hold it in for ammunition against the wary wheelsucker?
Me, I like to angle straight back and give it a little push. Reynold's Transport Theorem shows me that I can expect a little thrust. It's all about marginal gains.
Do you lift? Lean? Stay seated and fire out a squeaker? Flatulence before a break-away for a competitive advantage? Let out an SBD and blame the rider in front? Hold it in for ammunition against the wary wheelsucker?
Me, I like to angle straight back and give it a little push. Reynold's Transport Theorem shows me that I can expect a little thrust. It's all about marginal gains.
11-13-15, 09:44 AM
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You Know!? For Kids!
I ride solo and most of my rides are one big fart.
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Originally Posted by colorider
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
11-13-15, 09:47 AM
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Reminds me of the old guy in the rest home. He was sitting in his wheel chair, and started leaning to one side. An aide ran over and sat him back up straight. He started leaning over again, and she quickly set him back up again.
The old guy's daughter came for a visit. "How they treating you pop?". "OK, except that ***** over there won't let me fart!"
The old guy's daughter came for a visit. "How they treating you pop?". "OK, except that ***** over there won't let me fart!"
11-13-15, 10:16 AM
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Y'all have poor diets. Eat plenty of veg & fiber, enjoy regularity, and gas is a non-issue.
11-13-15, 10:21 AM
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Originally Posted by UnfilteredDregs
Y'all have poor diets. Eat plenty of veg & fiber, enjoy regularity, and gas is a non-issue.
11-13-15, 10:21 AM
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Originally Posted by RPK79
What about beer farts?
11-13-15, 10:22 AM
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Originally Posted by UnfilteredDregs
Y'all have poor diets. Eat plenty of veg & fiber, enjoy regularity, and gas is a non-issue.
Can I get away with it in ________________ insert place name, church, office, elevator? Will it smell? Dry, wet, or shart? It is almost like playing Russian roulette.
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Originally Posted by colorider
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
11-13-15, 10:24 AM
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Originally Posted by jsharr
Why do you hate farts? They offer such a thrill!
Can I get away with it in ________________ insert place name, church, office, elevator? Will it smell? Dry, wet, or shart? It is almost like playing Russian roulette.
Can I get away with it in ________________ insert place name, church, office, elevator? Will it smell? Dry, wet, or shart? It is almost like playing Russian roulette.
11-13-15, 10:26 AM
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Originally Posted by UnfilteredDregs
Y'all have poor diets. Eat plenty of veg & fiber, enjoy regularity, and gas is a non-issue.
11-13-15, 10:26 AM
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Originally Posted by silversx80
You make it seem like a bad thing. Embrace the farts... own them. Make them a part of you, and you a part of them. I recommend a diet high in dairy, protein and fats.
11-13-15, 10:28 AM
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The same way I do when in the tub - lift and separate.
11-13-15, 10:28 AM
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Originally Posted by UnfilteredDregs
Don't drink cheap beer.
11-13-15, 10:29 AM
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Originally Posted by RPK79
I'll have you know I have very expensive taste in beer!
11-13-15, 10:38 AM
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Originally Posted by UnfilteredDregs
Y'all have poor diets. Eat plenty of veg & fiber, enjoy regularity, and gas is a non-issue.
and there is no more sulfurous fart combination than a big yeasty belgian beer follow by a meal of boiled cabbage.
11-13-15, 10:38 AM
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Every ride I take begins with some burping and gas (although neither are generally a problem) then I began to perspire.... all within the first couple miles. For me it's like a pre-warm up. After that I ride without any issues (99.5% of the time).
It may take an additional 2-6 more miles before I actually feel loose and completely warmed up.
It may take an additional 2-6 more miles before I actually feel loose and completely warmed up.
11-13-15, 10:40 AM
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Originally Posted by UnfilteredDregs
Richly odoriferous then! Bud, Bud Light, Coors, etc... **** plays havoc with my guts.
Originally Posted by bonz50
based on very quick google searching, vegetarian diets produce more gas, so.......
and there is no more sulfurous fart combination than a big yeasty belgian beer follow by a meal of boiled cabbage.
and there is no more sulfurous fart combination than a big yeasty belgian beer follow by a meal of boiled cabbage.
11-13-15, 10:41 AM
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Originally Posted by bonz50
based on very quick google searching, vegetarian diets produce more gas, so.......
and there is no more sulfurous fart combination than a big yeasty belgian beer follow by a meal of boiled cabbage.
and there is no more sulfurous fart combination than a big yeasty belgian beer follow by a meal of boiled cabbage.
11-13-15, 10:42 AM
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Originally Posted by RPK79
I won't drink that swill if it is free.
I am a fan of the Belgians. Not so much cabbage (which goes against my Irish heritage).
I am a fan of the Belgians. Not so much cabbage (which goes against my Irish heritage).
11-13-15, 11:04 AM
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Originally Posted by silversx80
When you're in the saddle, and have to fart, how do you do it?
Do you lift? Lean? Stay seated and fire out a squeaker? Flatulence before a break-away for a competitive advantage? Let out an SBD and blame the rider in front? Hold it in for ammunition against the wary wheelsucker?
Me, I like to angle straight back and give it a little push. Reynold's Transport Theorem shows me that I can expect a little thrust. It's all about marginal gains.
Do you lift? Lean? Stay seated and fire out a squeaker? Flatulence before a break-away for a competitive advantage? Let out an SBD and blame the rider in front? Hold it in for ammunition against the wary wheelsucker?
Me, I like to angle straight back and give it a little push. Reynold's Transport Theorem shows me that I can expect a little thrust. It's all about marginal gains.
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