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Confession is Good for the Soul

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Road Cycling ďIt is by riding a bicycle that you learn the contours of a country best, since you have to sweat up the hills and coast down them. Thus you remember them as they actually are, while in a motor car only a high hill impresses you, and you have no such accurate remembrance of country you have driven through as you gain by riding a bicycle.Ē -- Ernest Hemingway

Confession is Good for the Soul

Old 01-12-20, 11:42 AM
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datlas 
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Confession is Good for the Soul

We were on a club ride yesterday and came across a bridge that was "closed" for construction. There were workers there and it was clearly passable. I went ahead of the group and asked kindly if we dismounted and walked across, could we please pass....the hard-hat guys said "yeah but we never said that" which was fine, so we crossed. After we crossed, when we reached the other side, the Supervisor was there and saw us and started yelling at us. You can't come through! You are trespassing! Can't you read the signs? If you get hurt you are going to sue my company! I very diplomatically said so sorry, we are not from here, we were very careful, and we had already gone through the construction why should we go back? He yelled about calling the cops but we slunk on our way.

This experience made me consider all my cycling sins/transgressions. And although I am neither Catholic nor religious, I do expect confession is good for the soul. So here goes my cycling confessions.

1. I have trespassed over "closed" bridges many times. I understand that there is risk, but if it's passable why can't we please go through?
2. I have "run" countless stop signs. I pretty much follow the "Idaho Stop" rule, treat a STOP sign as a Yield (especially 4-ways).
3. I have gone through red lights, after coming to a full stop and ensuring there is no cross traffic. Idaho/Dead red "excuse"."
4. I have gone around stopped cars on the shoulder to get to an intersection. Carefully but that's still a sin I think.
5. I have exceeded the 15MPH speed limit on the local MUP. But only when it's deserted.

I do hope I will be forgiven by the cycling gods and/or legal authorities.

Please feel free to comment and/or add your own confessions. I expect many of us are scofflaws. Sad.
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Old 01-12-20, 12:04 PM
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Crossed plenty of closed bridges.

Back in June I rode on two sections of I-90 in Montana that were barricaded at the on ramps. Donít know if they were officially closed to motor vehicles only. (Every inch of Interstate Highway in the state is normally open to bikes.) It sure was fun having the road to myself. Donít feel the least bit guilty, especially considering the alternative, which would have been riding the shoulder of the eastbound side towards traffic for a total of about 8 miles.
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Old 01-12-20, 12:26 PM
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Old 01-12-20, 02:31 PM
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You didnít snitch on the construction workers to their boss, and thatís what matters.
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Old 01-12-20, 02:55 PM
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I have ridden a road bike in a tri kit.
I have used a disc wheel and aero helmet on training rides.
I have ridden in just bibs or shorts, no jersey.

I have not peed my bike, however.
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Old 01-12-20, 03:05 PM
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While we are confessing...
  • I own 5 saddles
  • I own 6 pair of road shoes
  • I have 5 bibs and 8 pairs of shorts
  • I have 4 helmets
  • I have stems in every size
I have a problem...
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Old 01-12-20, 03:15 PM
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I've cut down a threadless steerer on a line drawn at the base of the stem instead of the line drawn at the top of the stem...

expensive.
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Old 01-12-20, 03:15 PM
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When I was 9, I ran over a pedestrian in a crosswalk at 14th and 5th in Manhattan. I'm pretty sure he had the light.

I've pulled the entire Kama Sutra of dumbass moves in traffic many times and, I'm sure, pissed a lot of drivers off. I don't do it anymore, as a rule, but ****'em anyway.
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Old 01-12-20, 03:26 PM
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  • I have trespassed on blocked new roads to claim them.
  • I have Idaho Stopped.
  • I have filtered through traffic, risking the wrath of the passive-aggressive Texas driver's accidentally-on-purpose dooring. Bless their hearts.
  • I have scorned the MUPpet warrior and pseudo-intellectual anti-A&Per.
  • I have MIPSed and SPINed my noggin with polycarbonate and EPS mushrooms.
  • I have worn Lycra and Spandex on my hybrid for casual rides.
  • I have worn baggy shorts and t-shirts on my road bike.
  • I have put turkey leg safety levers and dork discs *back* on a 1970s hi-ten drop bar bike. Because it was period correct and amused me.

All these I have done and more in the service of The Divine Ride.
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Old 01-12-20, 03:37 PM
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Old 01-12-20, 03:46 PM
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I routinely sprint when I happen to see a bike light coming up behind me on the MUP. Apparently, I am 8 years old still. And yes, of course, I have been caught.
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Old 01-12-20, 03:58 PM
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I rode a metric century and sucked wheels the entire time. Didn't pull once...
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Old 01-12-20, 04:11 PM
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I forgot to mention peeing outside, but the pro’s do it so I am not even sure it’s a sin as long as one is out in the country behind a tree.

#RunOnSentenceConfession
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Old 01-12-20, 04:56 PM
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I am deacon I can hear a confession but only the priest can give absolute.
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Old 01-12-20, 07:25 PM
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Originally Posted by datlas View Post
I forgot to mention peeing outside, but the proís do it so I am not even sure itís a sin as long as one is out in the country behind a tree.

#RunOnSentenceConfession
If thatís a sin, I am going to the Ninth Circle of Hell. One bad thing I have never done is heave a beat tubular into a tree, but guess I have been an accessory to that crime.
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Old 01-12-20, 07:41 PM
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Originally Posted by MoAlpha View Post
If thatís a sin, I am going to the Ninth Circle of Hell. One bad thing I have never done is heave a beat tubular into a tree, but guess I have been an accessory to that crime.
When Iím on a deserted road I often donít get off the bike. Just stop and go to the right.

One cultural thing I learned on a supported tour in QP is that the men never went into the woods. They would just turn their backs even when women were riding by. The women would often say things and laugh, like they were cheering them on. I donít speak French so I didnít know what they were saying.
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Old 01-12-20, 07:48 PM
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I have sinned so many times with trespassing on closed roads I think I am beyond hope. A couple of quick looks for the CHP and away I go. Once had the Sheriffs flying over me and thought for sure I was going to pay. I waved and they moved on.

Wrong board but I broke a statue of the Virgin Mary in first grade playing kickball and still fear a good spanking from one of the Sisters.
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Old 01-12-20, 08:05 PM
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Originally Posted by indyfabz View Post
When Iím on a deserted road I often donít get off the bike. Just stop and go to the right.

One cultural thing I learned on a supported tour in QP is that the men never went into the woods. They would just turn their backs even when women were riding by. The women would often say things and laugh, like they were cheering them on. I donít speak French so I didnít know what they were saying.
I donít always get off the bike either.

Anyone who races sailboats gets very used to peeing, changing clothes, etc. in mixed company.
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Old 01-12-20, 08:07 PM
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This is one of the best threads in months.
  • I've performed the Idaho stops.
  • I've peed outdoors.
  • I've ridden on a closed road.
  • I've kissed a girl while riding, but we both instantly paid for that with an intertwined handlebars crash.
  • I've paid more for bikes and equipment than I've admitted to my wife.
  • I've yelled obscenities to bad or aggressive drivers.
  • I've ridden an entire ride without pulling, then challenged others by pulling ahead at the end. (That was the most difficult one to admit)
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Old 01-12-20, 08:09 PM
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Originally Posted by Bassmanbob View Post
I've kissed a girl while riding, but we both instantly paid for that with an intertwined handlebars crash.
Ok we need the rest of that story.
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Old 01-12-20, 08:34 PM
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I put an Ultegra cassette on my Dura-Ace bike, and put the Dura ace lock ring on it so it looks like DA.
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Old 01-12-20, 10:18 PM
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Stop signs and lights, mostly. I'm also a hiker, so peeing outside isn't a sin. I've yelled at bad drivers. I've told friends rides "aren't that hard" and watched them struggle on the hills.
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Old 01-13-20, 02:42 AM
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I've been honked at and chased on a private road but they gave it up when instead of stopping I sped up. Possibly because I could dodge potholes and they couldn't.

I pee outside all the time.

I ride in jeans and hiking boots because you never know when something's going to need exploring off the bike. I wear bike-specific underwear, which I hope gives partial absolution.
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Old 01-13-20, 04:16 AM
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Sorry about this, but I have to ask as it seems a recurring theme: what's so wrong about peeing outside that you have to confess it?

I mean... I pee outside on half of my rides. What am I supposed to do if I'm 20km from home and get the urge? I just find a nice tree outside an urban area and do what I have to do... heck, I'm the only one who had stomach "issues" while riding? not saying that happens often to me, but definitely happened a couple of times in the last 10 years.

I once peed from the top of a cliff on the pyrenees
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Old 01-13-20, 05:06 AM
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Originally Posted by Amt0571 View Post
Sorry about this, but I have to ask as it seems a recurring theme: what's so wrong about peeing outside that you have to confess it?

I mean... I pee outside on half of my rides. What am I supposed to do if I'm 20km from home and get the urge? I just find a nice tree outside an urban area and do what I have to do... heck, I'm the only one who had stomach "issues" while riding? not saying that happens often to me, but definitely happened a couple of times in the last 10 years.

I once peed from the top of a cliff on the pyrenees
I am pretty sure it is against the law. Indecent exposure and public urination are typically outlawed (at least in USA). So pee carefully out there!
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Last edited by datlas; 01-13-20 at 05:17 AM.
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