The art of getting your partner into road biking (and doing it well?)
05-11-22, 11:50 AM
#26
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Great feedback here. All women respond differently. From rejecting it after the first ride to eventually kicking your butt on every climb.
One of my girlfriends, years ago, wanted to go riding with me. She was a former athlete and accustomed to besting her beaus. lol
Not me, however. And not that I tried. She got super-frustrated that she struggled on the smallest hills, even though I rode alongside.
The mistake I made was telling her that I would zoom ahead to see where the climb/road ended. And return to her with the news.
Boy, did that ever torque her. She accused me of getting all competitive and schooling her!
No matter how much I explained or apologized, she wanted nothing of it.
One of my girlfriends, years ago, wanted to go riding with me. She was a former athlete and accustomed to besting her beaus. lol
Not me, however. And not that I tried. She got super-frustrated that she struggled on the smallest hills, even though I rode alongside.
The mistake I made was telling her that I would zoom ahead to see where the climb/road ended. And return to her with the news.
Boy, did that ever torque her. She accused me of getting all competitive and schooling her!
No matter how much I explained or apologized, she wanted nothing of it.
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05-11-22, 12:14 PM
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I bought my non-cycling wife an ebike too. Now she can ride on occasion with me and for her it is an easy casual effort but she can still go 20 mph or more if she wishes. If she cranks up her motor power, I can get a good workout in and often can't even keep up with her. She looks at the ebike as a fun new toy. We now take our bikes on all our vacations. This has been a great expenditure for both of us. A regular bike would have been a complete waste of money.
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05-11-22, 05:19 PM
#28
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Tandem. It will take your relationship ,wherever it was going , faster
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You could fall off a cliff and die.
You could get lost and die.
You could hit a tree and die.
OR YOU COULD STAY HOME AND FALL OFF THE COUCH AND DIE.
You could fall off a cliff and die.
You could get lost and die.
You could hit a tree and die.
OR YOU COULD STAY HOME AND FALL OFF THE COUCH AND DIE.
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05-11-22, 07:59 PM
#29
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I appreciate everyone's responses.
To clarify some obvious miscommunication here, she now wants to cycle, wants a road bike specifically, and is excited about training and achieving on it. She's a competitive and sporty person in her late 20s. It seems like a lot of people project the preferences and personalities of their partners onto mine based on the nature and tone of their advice here.
I always wanted the final call to get a bike to come from her, for her to ask to go to the bike shop, which never happened among all the other things going on, until she was recently advised that it would be a good idea to replace some high impact sports for a while. Now this was the impulse to change things up, she asked for it, hence it 'played into my hands'. I am very happy about it, and I am here to learn about how people went with getting their partners into it, making it fun, helping the passion grow, and to avoid pitfalls. This is, as was said, a bit different for everyone, but it is still good to hear about it.
She likes 'training', wants tips and information, does not care about the colour scheme of a bike, and road biking was specifically discussed with the physio/docs in this context.
We'll certainly leave no stone unturned in terms of saddles/stems etc. to refine the fit. I am a great believer in detailed bike fitting, the benefits of that are crystal clear every day I ride.
To clarify some obvious miscommunication here, she now wants to cycle, wants a road bike specifically, and is excited about training and achieving on it. She's a competitive and sporty person in her late 20s. It seems like a lot of people project the preferences and personalities of their partners onto mine based on the nature and tone of their advice here.
I always wanted the final call to get a bike to come from her, for her to ask to go to the bike shop, which never happened among all the other things going on, until she was recently advised that it would be a good idea to replace some high impact sports for a while. Now this was the impulse to change things up, she asked for it, hence it 'played into my hands'. I am very happy about it, and I am here to learn about how people went with getting their partners into it, making it fun, helping the passion grow, and to avoid pitfalls. This is, as was said, a bit different for everyone, but it is still good to hear about it.
She likes 'training', wants tips and information, does not care about the colour scheme of a bike, and road biking was specifically discussed with the physio/docs in this context.
We'll certainly leave no stone unturned in terms of saddles/stems etc. to refine the fit. I am a great believer in detailed bike fitting, the benefits of that are crystal clear every day I ride.
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05-11-22, 08:35 PM
#30
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Originally Posted by tomato coupe
1. Make sure her bike fits her well, and don't hesitate to buy multiple saddles for her to try.
2. Don't make faces if she buys a lot of cycling clothes.
3. Get her a custom bike, and let her design the paint scheme.
4. Put an electronic group set on her bike, to make shifting as easy as possible.
5. If she asks to go for a ride, forget about your training ride and ride with her instead.
6. Let her set the pace on uphill sections. You can pull on flats and downhills, but make sure she can stay on your wheel.
7. Give riding tips sparingly.
8. Clean and adjust her bike regularly.
2. Don't make faces if she buys a lot of cycling clothes.
3. Get her a custom bike, and let her design the paint scheme.
4. Put an electronic group set on her bike, to make shifting as easy as possible.
5. If she asks to go for a ride, forget about your training ride and ride with her instead.
6. Let her set the pace on uphill sections. You can pull on flats and downhills, but make sure she can stay on your wheel.
7. Give riding tips sparingly.
8. Clean and adjust her bike regularly.
05-11-22, 08:54 PM
#31
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My wife and I had that exact situation. I've been a road cyclist all my life, rode centuries in my teens, that sort of thing. Then life and career got in the way and I quit riding. About 27 years ago, we both bought decent used bikes and started riding again. She had no experience of road riding, so she rode on MUPs. I rode with her a little on the MUP, but mostly used roads. After a few years of this, she started riding on the road with me. And after a couple years of that, she had an almost fatal accident, being run over by a 1-ton truck. That would not have happened had she been riding on the road since she was 8, like me.
Her new single bike now sits on a very nice trainer, and she rides stoker for me on our tandem. She loves it. She feels totally safe. We've done double centuries and rides in the mountains on it.
I've been riding with the same roadie group for 25 years. We have a group ride every week and maybe 1/3 of the riders are women. Many of them are there solo, without their partner. It's a wonderful social time. There are no people who ride in this group who haven't been riding since they were children, except for my wife who rides on our tandem.
So give this some thought. Riding on the road not "can be" but "is" very dangerous. Cars pass us, sometimes only 2' away. Cars turn right and left, right in front of us. There's no room for error, ever. One's reflexes have to be perfect, every time. It helps a lot to have many thousands of miles behind your wheels.
Her new single bike now sits on a very nice trainer, and she rides stoker for me on our tandem. She loves it. She feels totally safe. We've done double centuries and rides in the mountains on it.
I've been riding with the same roadie group for 25 years. We have a group ride every week and maybe 1/3 of the riders are women. Many of them are there solo, without their partner. It's a wonderful social time. There are no people who ride in this group who haven't been riding since they were children, except for my wife who rides on our tandem.
So give this some thought. Riding on the road not "can be" but "is" very dangerous. Cars pass us, sometimes only 2' away. Cars turn right and left, right in front of us. There's no room for error, ever. One's reflexes have to be perfect, every time. It helps a lot to have many thousands of miles behind your wheels.
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05-12-22, 07:33 AM
#32
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Originally Posted by yaw
To clarify some obvious miscommunication here, she now wants to cycle, wants a road bike specifically, and is excited about training and achieving on it.
Originally Posted by yaw
It seems like a lot of people project the preferences and personalities of their partners onto mine based on the nature and tone of their advice here.
05-12-22, 08:35 AM
#33
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Originally Posted by aplcr0331
This is your social, financial, sexual, mental, and all encompassing bike hobby...not hers. I felt like I was reading a GANTT chart looking at your post. I'm guessing you might overwhelm her a bit with this.
No "trackers". No training...for God's sake, lol. Do all the **** you want to with her bike (I do for my wifes bike) but don't bore her to death by explaining it or even telling her about it. You want to balance her wheels (Jesus) then go do it, she's not going to care about that kind of stuff. Tires? Won't mean a thing to her. Pick a MUP for your first ride with some nice scenery. You're not going to get any Strava KOM's so take this chance to...you know...enjoy some time with your wife. Don't watch her shifts, don't critique her "fit" and all the other crap type-A cyclists do.
Just enjoy the ride.
Most of this crap will works itself out. My one piece of advice for the "serious" cyclist is that unless your wife has already done training and tends to overdo things like we do and cycling is likely to become an obsession for her, just get her an e-bike. I think about cycling, daydream about it, watch races, "train" in the winter, train in the spring, learn about physiology all of it. But my wife likes her Hot Yoga, walking her dog everyday and doing Orange Theory with her sister. She alread is active with her own hobbies. She does like to ride with me or on group rides. But since she doesn't "train" like I do she feels bad being the "slow" one. So I got her an e-bike. Now...no worries she can hop on the bike in the Spring and she keeps up on the flats and motor paces everyone up the climbs. We love it (when we're not tired). She'll enjoy it more if she doesn't feel like a hinderance.
Here's my wifes bike. As long as it works, is charged up, and there's some Purple on it...she's happy.
Good luck, hope you get to enjoy some fun cycling times with your wife.
No "trackers". No training...for God's sake, lol. Do all the **** you want to with her bike (I do for my wifes bike) but don't bore her to death by explaining it or even telling her about it. You want to balance her wheels (Jesus) then go do it, she's not going to care about that kind of stuff. Tires? Won't mean a thing to her. Pick a MUP for your first ride with some nice scenery. You're not going to get any Strava KOM's so take this chance to...you know...enjoy some time with your wife. Don't watch her shifts, don't critique her "fit" and all the other crap type-A cyclists do.
Just enjoy the ride.
Most of this crap will works itself out. My one piece of advice for the "serious" cyclist is that unless your wife has already done training and tends to overdo things like we do and cycling is likely to become an obsession for her, just get her an e-bike. I think about cycling, daydream about it, watch races, "train" in the winter, train in the spring, learn about physiology all of it. But my wife likes her Hot Yoga, walking her dog everyday and doing Orange Theory with her sister. She alread is active with her own hobbies. She does like to ride with me or on group rides. But since she doesn't "train" like I do she feels bad being the "slow" one. So I got her an e-bike. Now...no worries she can hop on the bike in the Spring and she keeps up on the flats and motor paces everyone up the climbs. We love it (when we're not tired). She'll enjoy it more if she doesn't feel like a hinderance.
Here's my wifes bike. As long as it works, is charged up, and there's some Purple on it...she's happy.
Good luck, hope you get to enjoy some fun cycling times with your wife.
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05-12-22, 09:19 AM
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Originally Posted by merlinextraligh
Tandem. It will take your relationship ,wherever it was going , faster
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