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I was passed on a hill by a fat chick.
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What a great thread.
-I got into loaded bike touring a few years back, and ever since then I ride with all four panniers on every ride - mostly for convenience and to bring things along on a picnic, but not entirely. One of many reasons is so that I never have to feel bad about being "dropped" by anyone and bruising my fragile ego. -I once had a slow-motion standing fall at a major intersection - completely stationary and waiting on a light. The bike just kept going on and losing ground beneath me. People were laughing, honking their horns...I rode on, and about a mile up the road, some guy drove up next to me and gave me back the pannier that I hadn't noticed I left behind. -My most major accident was seconds after giving someone in a car the finger. I face-planted in a ditch, losing two front teeth and bleeding like Niagara Falls. Whoever I gave the finger to must have loved it. -I lost my tent once because it just slid out behind me the ONE time I decided to only bungee it instead of looping a guy line around it. Nobody returned it this time. I'm sure lots of motorists loved that one too. -Many times, if I couldn't conquer a hill, I've stopped and pretended to look at a map while my body caught up with the pain. Can't let them see the hill licked you, but who are we fooling? -I once had my lock hanging loosely between two bungee cords on the back of my rig. It slid down and dragged along the rear tire for probably 20 of the toughest flat miles I've ever done. I just couldn't figure out why it was so much harder to pedal - I assumed I was bonking or wasn't up to it that day. I also couldn't put my finger on that burning smell... When I finally stopped to get some food, the tire was worn down to the red underlayer, and the plastic casing was burned away on my U-lock. Bummer. |
Originally Posted by chroot
Let's see...
I've fallen about eight times myself on clipless, and have done plenty of stupid things. Let's recap: - I fell after three minutes of clipless use in a parking lot in front of my girlfriend. - I almost fell two minutes later (the gf was still watching), and actually broke the cleat. - I fell once because I neglected to unclip both feet when turning the bike around 180 degrees. A nice patch of bramble bushes broke my fall. - I fell once because I was in much too high a gear to begin moving up a hill. - I fell once waiting for a car to pass, after the driver tried to be "nice" by giving me the inappropriate right-of-way. - I end up in my granny gear at least once on almost every ride that's not board-flat. - I have found myself wishing for gears lower than 30/25 literally dozens of times. - I hit my max heart rate within three minutes of my most recent liesurely group ride. - I couldn't fight the wind on the Golden Gate Bridge one morning and ended up getting pushed into the railing. - My helmet (Giro Pneumo) makes my head look like a mushroom. My girlfriend is happy to point this out routinely. - I always have the whitest little chicken legs of anyone in every group ride I've done to date. - I almost cried when I fell on someone's driveway at 0 mph and my brifter got rotated out of line. I thought I had ruined my bike. When I got home, I finally realized you can just push them back. - I'm absolutely terrified of going through the rows of concrete poles that block cars from entering bike paths. - I got stuck at a protected left turn light for almost ten minutes one time because I could not figure out how to trigger the light, or what else to do. - I took a quick look at someone else's bike and thought for a minute or two that he was riding a bike called a Bento Box. I complimented him on a nice looking Bento Box. He was puzzled. - Warren omg!!! i thought i was the only one terrifiied of the concrete poles!!!!!!! |
While riding on the local path, realized I was passing my son's camp group walking back from the pool. Located him, waved and called to him, only turning forward again in time to watch myself fall off the path. The young, male counselors LOVED that! My son swore he didn't see it (deny everything! that's my boy!) ...
I confess to being passed by the occasional male rider as well ... |
Add.. I have feigned a thrown chain, once, when I was killing myslef on a hill in a group ride...
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Oh, yeah. I brought a brand new bike. Took the front wheel off. Put the bike in my car. Left the front wheel on the ground. Then backed up. As soon as I heard the sickening crunch, I knew I would have to go back in the shop and order a brand new wheel. Boy did I feel like a Yahoo.
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Originally Posted by Blackberry
Oh, yeah. I brought a brand new bike. Took the front wheel off. Put the bike in my car. Left the front wheel on the ground. Then backed up. As soon as I heard the sickening crunch, I knew I would have to go back in the shop and order a brand new wheel. Boy did I feel like a Yahoo.
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I have fallen over on the right side twice this week. Once as two 10 year olds cut me off on a downhill. I can't get my right foot out of my speedplay pedals fast enough.
Then today, a policecar cut me off and I went down again. Same thing... very slow, but this was a bit painful. I got passed by an inline skater once. |
Falling over onto the "clipped-in" side of the bike after unclipping, of course.
Thinking "I bet I could catch that rider I see ahead in the distance" only to eventually realize that it's only a mailbox. I love the ones about pretending to look at a map on the difficult hills - will have to remember that! My most recent one...just last weekend I finished a 50 mile race in 2 hours 50 minutes, a time I was pleased with considering I had a broken tibia, torn ACL and MCL a year ago and couldn't even bend my knee enough to complete a revolution until October. Found out afterwards that the 10 year old kid who was in the race illegally came in 3 minutes ahead of me! |
i haven't had many mishaps on the road bike, but plenty on a mountain bike.
mtb: - after exclaiming "check this out!" to the people i was riding with, i tried to bunny hop a tumbleweed at 25mph. when i realized i had failed, i tried to ditch, but my feet hooked the handlbars, sending the bike flipping over my head as i landed sliding on my hands and knees. the bike ended-up about 25' down the trail. i lost blood. road: - i had just bought a new bike computer a couple of days prior, when i was bombing down palomar mountain at 50mph. i looked down to check my speed, but i had cadence in the big display. so when i pushed the button to switch the display, the computer popped out of the bracket and cartwheeled -- also at 50mph -- along side me as i slammed on my brakes. it went into the bushes never to be found. i've never crashed on a road bike and none of my unclipping incidents are worth mentioning. |
I've used my wife's Monistat to get over a case of the crotch rot. (it works pretty well believe it or not).
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I haven't wrecked yet, or at least since 1984 when I highsided my Fuji. Couple of close calls with dogs and deer. Saw a 6 point buck posing on a lawn last week. The first fuc*in dog that chases and successfully bites me will die a death handeth over by myselfeth.
Lots of clipless fallovers posts. I went clipless 3 months ago and haven't gone down yet. Came close but I always remember so far. Unless it's a emergency quick pop out, I release my right cleat and instead of putting right foot on ground I throw right leg around back of bike to left side and then put it down on left side stopping bike at same time. This way I eliminate the right side of any chance to fall on. Oh yeah, I was dropped by a short, kinda heavy chick on a group ride this Spring. The cool thing was I knew seeing her in ther parking lot pre-race in full kit, 2.5k of bike, she would rock my world. My world she indeed rocked. |
Originally Posted by dfw
I've used my wife's Monistat to get over a case of the crotch rot. (it works pretty well believe it or not).
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- Have purchased a bike for $10, only to put another $150 into it and still only have a Schwinn
- Own a bike older than I am - Have (nearly) fallen over in clipless pedals waiting for a car to pass - Have yet to ride any length more than 35 miles in a day - Thought a Mongoose FS mtb was a great investment ... best I can do for now. |
Yeah well...I get dropped by everyone...including a 9 year old girl. Sometimes I wish they wouldn't mark your age on the back of your leg in a triathlon. My stupid ego made me chase her down and nearly give myself a heart attack in the process. Then she blew past me in the run like I was standing still...which I probably was at that point!
I can't count how many times I've fallen over because I couldn't unclip... I crashed my bike into a parked car because I was watching two kittens frollicking in someones front yard. I also fell over once because I tried to jam the little plug back into my handlebars. Yeah...I'm a real work of art!! |
Ok, I'll admit it:
I can't ride no-hands. I know, I know....I'm ashamed of myself. I can whip it out and pee while riding, though. |
Lets see
I've gained weight cycling...Up nearly 15-20 pounds! What gives?! I've been dropped by a girl on a lesser bike I've been dropped by a girl in street clothes I've melted a tire from having to slam the brakes I've destroyed 2 bikes from not being able to react in time to stop I've struggled up a hill on a tripple Ive slid down a hill because I could'nt handle as well as I thought I've also snapped a chain just to be sent flying over my bars and getting torn up while trying to show off I've yelled one to many times at one to many people |
Originally Posted by simplyred
Do I want to get better? Absolutely... And the thing with cycling is; it can't happen in a day, a month, or even a year.
Great thread. 55/Rad |
Some very funny stories! Especially chroot's :lol: So Woody! keep them up
I have many MTB bloopers but only one roadie so far, about a month ago; I was recovering at a flat part of the W&OD trail and went for my water bottle. There was only one gulp left so I raised my head and bottle very high in stupid fashion. In doing this I lost the pavement, went into the rough, hit a rock that blew my tire and rocketed out of control into a private backyard. The tireless front wheel sank in the soft grassy soil and sent me rolling over the handlebar and to the ground flat on my back just beside a swing set :o It appears that no one saw my stunt... or just maybe some lady was laughing her a$$ off behind a window :D I now refined my drinking technique, "sideways" a'la TdF Cheers |
When I first got clipless, I went on a group ride. Somehow I got ahead because of a traffic light. So there I was pedaling along up the hill, when my leg cramped up. Unfortenatly I wasn't used to clipless pedals yet, so down I went. My legs cramped up so bad I couldn't even seat for 5 minutes. Ofcourse the rest of the group catched up to me about few seconds after I felt. So they were just standing around for 4 something minutes while I lay there on the ground. Now that was embarassing.
Then ofcourse there were those couple of times I hit a parked car.... |
Originally Posted by UmneyDurak
Then ofcourse there were those couple of times I hit a parked car....
I just changed my blownout tire so I tried to see if my speedo would work(dont ask me why) so I am riding slow in the parking lot, looking at the speedo....1 second=nothing, 2 seconds=nothing, 3 seconds=finally I see 3mph on the speedo and I look up...I am 1 foot from a parked car, I turned sharp sideways and hit it with my knee. I was in sOO much pain but I had to move before the guy came back and blamed me for anything(I didnt even leave a scratch). I then went around the back and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for my leg to heal. That was really imbarassing, especially with my dad standing there and laughing at me the whole time :( |
I wiped out in front of a girl in an espresso stand because I decided to run over a balloon in the street and it didn't pop.
I exploded a tube on a borrowed K-mart bike using a gas station air pump. Then I spent about a hour trying to fix a 6 inch rip in the tube using car tire patches before calling a cab to get home. I ignored a rattle at the back of my bike until the rack fell off over the back and dragged a hole through my new waterproof pannier. I ignored a noise from my chain until the connecting link parted and destroyed the rear deraileur by wrapping it over the top of the cassette. My low gear is a 33/32 and I'm not afraid to use it. |
Hahahahah what were you thinking trying to pop a baloon. That must have been hilarious...
I dont know my lowest gear but its pretty low. I start moving at 7-8 mph and feel like I am not making progress...Im on a double too |
hmm i don't have anything fun to say. i guess i'm plagued with fortune...anyway i have pedal straps, haven't saved enough to get clipless, and if i forgot to pull my shoe out of the pedal, that'd be funny.
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Can't ride no handed nor trackstand and my descending sucks. Actually it's getting better but I don't like to experiment when riding with other people (as I don't like holding people up or make a bad move and endanger anyone) so I think I'm stunting myself.
I climb pretty well for a newbie although I always enjoy being passed by people of greater skill and/or determination. My personal favorite, passing and then 1min later being passed by a 77 year old man. I was too flabergasted to even react to that and what was even cooler was I found out later that he was an ex Euro racer. I hope I'm even half that competent when I get to that age. |
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