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Thread consolidation: Whatever you bought today, it sucks.

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Thread consolidation: Whatever you bought today, it sucks.

Old 03-13-07, 08:13 AM
  #51  
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And I was going to visit the LBS today. Even the new water bottles I was going to buy? I haven't earned them? And the gloves I needed? I'm not good enough for them?

Aw, shucks. *kicks rock, walks away muttering*
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Old 03-13-07, 08:13 AM
  #52  
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Originally Posted by Cromulent
And I was going to visit the LBS today. Even the new water bottles I was going to buy? I haven't earned them? And the gloves I needed? I'm not good enough for them?

Aw, shucks. *kicks rock, walks away muttering*
LBSs suck.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:15 AM
  #53  
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Originally Posted by biker7
Magic 8 ball approach is more fitting then a quantitative method because it better comports with the haphazard or capricious responses on this board. Besides, the issue with quantitative methods is since all responses are qualitative, it is impossible to assign a number value. Hmmm, then again, that would be consistent with other disinformation spewed. I therefore give my response a 1 also.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:15 AM
  #54  
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Originally Posted by Cromulent
And I was going to visit the LBS today. Even the new water bottles I was going to buy? I haven't earned them? And the gloves I needed? I'm not good enough for them?

Aw, shucks. *kicks rock, walks away muttering*
The gloves were the wrong size, and the bottles were too fragile. Trust me on this one.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:16 AM
  #55  
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Originally Posted by botto
LBSs suck.
I'm too good for an LBS. The car behind me gives me everything I need.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:16 AM
  #56  
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I would just like to propose alternatives to "Too new"

- You're field testing the new technology

It makes it sound like a more well reasoned response even if there is no more information to back it up.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:17 AM
  #57  
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Originally Posted by Little Darwin
I would just like to propose alternatives to "Too new"

- You're field testing the new technology

It makes it sound like a more well reasoned response even if there is no more information to back it up.
Slight modification:

- You're field testing unverified technology.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:18 AM
  #58  
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Originally Posted by DrPete
The gloves were the wrong size, and the bottles were too fragile. Trust me on this one.
Yes, sir. Thank you, sir. I'd ask for another, sir, but it would suck, sir.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:23 AM
  #59  
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Should I pay my water bill? I would like a drink or two during a ride.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:27 AM
  #60  
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Originally Posted by iab
Should I pay my water bill? I would like a drink or two during a ride.
you're not good enough for water.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:29 AM
  #61  
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I'm confused...can I still ride my bike or is that wrong?
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Old 03-13-07, 08:29 AM
  #62  
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Originally Posted by ElJamoquio
Slight modification:

- You're field testing unverified technology.
Noted and added.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:29 AM
  #63  
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Originally Posted by DrPete
So the UPS drivers of the country are already out on the roads this morning, or maybe you're headed over to your LBS to look for a bike. Or maybe you're shopping online for some bike parts or bikes today.

In the interest of making your shopping easier, perhaps all of the advice on BF can be consolidated into one thread so that you can know what an idiot you were for buying whatever it was without having to dig through old threads or use the search function.

So, if you bought something today, one of these things does apply and you should just hang your head in shame.

-You paid way too much.
-You didn't pay enough.
-It's not nice enough.
-It's too nice.
-You don't deserve it.
-You totally deserve better.
-You're not good enough for it.
-You're too good for it.
-It's the wrong color.
-I've never seen you or the product in person, but it's the wrong size.
-It's too Fred.
-It's too OCP.
-Only snobs use that.
-It's too fragile.
-It's too strong.
-It's too stiff.
-It's too flexy.
-It was made in the wrong place.
-You bought it from the wrong place.
-It's totally the wrong frame material. I don't mean you won't like the ride, I mean you're endangering your life.
-It's too new.
-It's too old.
-I don't own it or can't afford it, so it sucks.

There. That should sum it up. All your BF shopping advice in one place. So whatever you bought, either return it now or peruse the list above and then return it. Either way, you're wrong.
Pete...this is why it's good to know what you are doing and only use a reference point like Bikeforums for amusement.


A lot of amusement.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:31 AM
  #64  
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Originally Posted by botto
you're not good enough for water.
Sweet!
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Old 03-13-07, 08:32 AM
  #65  
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Originally Posted by roadwarrior
Pete...this is why it's good to know what you are doing and only use a reference point like Bikeforums for amusement.


A lot of amusement.
This is truth.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:34 AM
  #66  
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Originally Posted by DrPete
This is truth.
We can't handle the truth. The truth was made by five-year-old sweatshop laborers in commie china. The truth explodes upon impact. We are too good for the truth.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:35 AM
  #67  
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Originally Posted by Cromulent
We can't handle the truth. The truth was made by five-year-old sweatshop laborers in commie china. The truth explodes upon impact. We are too good for the truth.
The truth was made in the wrong place and is way too Fred.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:38 AM
  #68  
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Originally Posted by DrPete
The truth was made in the wrong place and is way too Fred.


The truth is way too light and melts under the sun. Does the truth come in titanium??
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Old 03-13-07, 08:46 AM
  #69  
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Originally Posted by Clutch49
The truth is way too light and melts under the sun. Does the truth come in titanium??

I'm going to go out on a limb, and say that titanium truth is too good for you. You'll be satisfied with copper truth, as it is much more malleable.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:50 AM
  #70  
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Originally Posted by Clutch49
I'm confused...can I still ride my bike or is that wrong?
Sure, you can ride, but do so knowing that you WILL commit some cycling etiquette faux pas and will need to atone for it upon your return home.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:51 AM
  #71  
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Originally Posted by Cromulent
We can't handle the truth. We are too good for the truth.
Sometimes the truth hurts.

That's why time trialing is referred to as "The Race of Truth".

Whatever happens, the clock knows no friends or enemies, nor does the clock lie. The clock could care less what you are wearing, or what you are riding.

Ever.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:53 AM
  #72  
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Originally Posted by DrPete
Sure, you can ride, but do so knowing that you WILL commit some cycling etiquette faux pas and will need to atone for it upon your return home.
Hey, I rode yesterday and two people waved at me. And they were on road bikes.

Musta been the nice (finally) weather. Spring fever. Something.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:53 AM
  #73  
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Originally Posted by roadwarrior
Sometimes the truth hurts.

That's why time trialing is referred to as "The Race of Truth".

Whatever happens, the clock knows no friends or enemies, nor does the clock lie. The clock could care less what you are wearing, or what you are riding.

Ever.
They paid too much for the clock and bought it from the wrong person.
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Old 03-13-07, 08:54 AM
  #74  
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Originally Posted by DrPete
They paid too much for the clock and bought it from the wrong person.
But, but...it was carbonaniumalumunum. And atomic.



And I got it from Bikesperformancedirrecnash.com.net.org...cuz that no good sob from the LBS wouldn't sell it for $1 less so I paid $15 in shipping fees to "Stick it to the man"...
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Old 03-13-07, 09:02 AM
  #75  
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Originally Posted by iab
Should I pay my water bill? I would like a drink or two during a ride.
Originally Posted by botto
you're not good enough for water.
Wait a sec here. So Dr. Pete's list applies to life outside of cycling? I guess we're all screwed then.

I think I'm starting to..... u n d e r s t a n d
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