Go Back  Bike Forums > Bike Forums > Road Cycling
Reload this Page >

What type of frame would withstand a karate chop best?

Notices
Road Cycling It is by riding a bicycle that you learn the contours of a country best, since you have to sweat up the hills and coast down them. Thus you remember them as they actually are, while in a motor car only a high hill impresses you, and you have no such accurate remembrance of country you have driven through as you gain by riding a bicycle. -- Ernest Hemingway

What type of frame would withstand a karate chop best?

Old 05-18-09, 08:13 PM
  #1  
TheKillerPenguin
Nonsense
Thread Starter
 
TheKillerPenguin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Vagabond
Posts: 13,819

Bikes: Affirmative

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 842 Post(s)
Liked 380 Times in 170 Posts
What type of frame would withstand a karate chop best?

You see those ****in kids at Tiger Schaulmman's? Little bastds punch through wood like white on rice. Let's say you were riding along minding your own business, and all of a sudden a FECKIN NINJA jumps out of the bushes and karate chops your bike. Naturally, this could suck. Unless, that is, your bike is capable of withstanding the WOOD CHOP POWER OF THE NINJA. What type of frame material would best withstand this chopping power? Carbon fiber? **** that **** man, it'll shatter like a flying tiger on the moon! Steel? I dunno, I farted on a steel bike once and it melted. Al? That **** crimps if you look at it funny. Maybe Ti? I dunno. What say you, bf?
TheKillerPenguin is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 08:16 PM
  #2  
celticfrost
Raising the Abyss
 
celticfrost's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: TTing on the MUP
Posts: 3,822

Bikes: Expensive ones that I ride slowly

Mentioned: 3 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
Liked 9 Times in 3 Posts
Some feckin ninja jumps outta the woods at this good old boy and he's gonna get some USA FIST OF POWER right smack in the kisser. Frame material of my bike be damned!!!
__________________
"...in Las Vegas where -the electric bills are staggering -the decor hog wild -and the entertainment saccharine -what a golden age -what a time of right and reason -the consumer's king -and unhappiness is treason..."
celticfrost is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 08:18 PM
  #3  
TheKillerPenguin
Nonsense
Thread Starter
 
TheKillerPenguin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Vagabond
Posts: 13,819

Bikes: Affirmative

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 842 Post(s)
Liked 380 Times in 170 Posts
Dude, that's not an option. Trying to punch a ninja is like trying to arm wrestle Optimus Prime.
TheKillerPenguin is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 08:21 PM
  #4  
martinus
Senior Member
 
martinus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 939
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 2 Times in 2 Posts
" Is this a serious question ? " ( name that movie )

.
.
.
martinus is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 08:29 PM
  #5  
recursive
Geosynchronous Falconeer
 
recursive's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Sacramento, CA
Posts: 6,312

Bikes: 2006 Raleigh Rush Hour, Campy Habanero Team Ti, Soma Double Cross

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
I miss ryanf.
__________________
Bring the pain.
recursive is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 08:33 PM
  #6  
grahny
hobo
 
grahny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: CO
Posts: 3,784
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
only a frame made out of ralph macchio himself could withstand such a hit
grahny is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 08:36 PM
  #7  
TheKillerPenguin
Nonsense
Thread Starter
 
TheKillerPenguin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Vagabond
Posts: 13,819

Bikes: Affirmative

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 842 Post(s)
Liked 380 Times in 170 Posts
Arent there laws against that sort of thing?
TheKillerPenguin is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 08:57 PM
  #8  
Anti404
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Indiana
Posts: 514

Bikes: 2015 Scott Solace 30, 2007 CAAD9 Optimo 1

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 26 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 1 Time in 1 Post
Originally Posted by TheKillerPenguin View Post
Dude, that's not an option. Trying to punch a ninja is like trying to arm wrestle Optimus Prime.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Of3JPLRqNJw
Anti404 is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 09:02 PM
  #9  
BillyD
Administrator
 
BillyD's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Hudson Valley, NY
Posts: 29,494

Bikes: Merlin Cyrene '04; Bridgestone RB-1 '92

Mentioned: 307 Post(s)
Tagged: 2 Thread(s)
Quoted: 9101 Post(s)
Liked 2,788 Times in 1,580 Posts
KP, how dare you break into my secret stash of hallucinogens.
Now go to bed and sleep it off and I'll make like this thread never happened.
__________________
See, this is why we can't have nice things. - - smarkinson
Where else but the internet can a bunch of cyclists go and be the tough guy? - - jdon
BillyD is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 09:03 PM
  #10  
Doohickie 
You gonna eat that?
 
Doohickie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Fort Worth, Texas Church of Hopeful Uncertainty
Posts: 14,720

Bikes: 1966 Raleigh DL-1 Tourist, 1973 Schwinn Varsity, 1983 Raleigh Marathon, 1994 Nishiki Sport XRS

Mentioned: 6 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 163 Post(s)
Liked 49 Times in 31 Posts
You need a frame made of heavium.



P.S. The rims are made of heavium too!
__________________
I stop for people / whose right of way I honor / but not for no one.


Originally Posted by bragi "However, it's never a good idea to overgeneralize."
Doohickie is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 09:33 PM
  #11  
ridethecliche
Batw Creakcreak
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Dirty Jerz
Posts: 20,701
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 190 Post(s)
Liked 230 Times in 134 Posts
I think doohickies frame would survive a nuke after being karate chopped by a ninja!
ridethecliche is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 09:43 PM
  #12  
Treker
Zebra
 
Treker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Ottawa ON
Posts: 590

Bikes: '04 Trek 1000, '05 Devinci Millenium; 07 Spec. Allez

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Simply an Inspector Clouseau frame.
Treker is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 10:01 PM
  #13  
Psimet2001 
I eat carbide.
 
Psimet2001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Elgin, IL
Posts: 21,386

Bikes: Lots. Van Dessel and Squid Dealer

Mentioned: 25 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1164 Post(s)
Liked 925 Times in 410 Posts
Originally Posted by TheKillerPenguin View Post
Dude, that's not an option. Trying to punch a ninja is like trying to arm wrestle Optimus Prime.
Dude....leave Optimus out of this.


Respect the prime.




and ninjas.


*i have ninjas in my pants*
__________________
PSIMET Wheels, PSIMET Racing, PSIMET Neutral Race Support, and 11 Jackson Coffee
Podcast - YouTube Channel
Video about PSIMET Wheels

Psimet2001 is offline  
Old 05-18-09, 10:18 PM
  #14  
wanders
going roundy round
 
wanders's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: High Point, NC
Posts: 6,085
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Originally Posted by grahny View Post
only a frame made out of ralph macchio himself could withstand such a hit
ralph macchio - pshaw. A frame made of Steven Seagal's hair would spontaneously snap the arm at the elbow of any ninja that came within 10 feet of it.
wanders is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 03:07 AM
  #15  
ThreePutt
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 8
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
What type of frame would withstand a karate chop best? A Karate Monkey.
ThreePutt is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 04:40 AM
  #16  
Dr_Robert
AKA Nathan
 
Dr_Robert's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Columbus Ohio
Posts: 514
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by ThreePutt View Post
A Karate Monkey.
Winner.
__________________
'08 Bianchi San Jose
'06 Giant OCR C3
'04 Specialized Hardrock Comp
Dr_Robert is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 07:13 AM
  #17  
CrimsonKarter21
Mitcholo
 
CrimsonKarter21's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Oost Vlaanderen in mind, Cleveland in body
Posts: 8,850

Bikes: 2010 Mitcholo w/ Sram Force/Red

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by ThreePutt View Post
What type of frame would withstand a karate chop best? A Karate Monkey.
Score for the newbie.
CrimsonKarter21 is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 08:05 AM
  #18  
daven1986
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 2,324
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
a bamboo frame would probably work best
daven1986 is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 08:13 AM
  #19  
Garfield Cat
Senior Member
 
Garfield Cat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Huntington Beach, CA
Posts: 6,966

Bikes: Cervelo Prodigy

Mentioned: 4 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 410 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 49 Times in 37 Posts
A bike frame equipped to resist karate chops. Unless the martial artist is on drugs, he would not attempt to punch or kick into nails. A bike frame covered with nails.
Garfield Cat is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 08:33 AM
  #20  
MONGO!
Senior Member
 
MONGO!'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 4,279
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 1 Time in 1 Post
A frame woven from Chuck Norris' beard could withstand anything.
MONGO! is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 08:48 AM
  #21  
CastIron
Sensible shoes.
 
CastIron's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: St. Paul,MN
Posts: 8,798

Bikes: A few.

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
CastIron, baby.
__________________
Mike
Originally Posted by cedricbosch View Post
It looks silly when you have quotes from other forum members in your signature. Nobody on this forum is that funny.
Originally Posted by cedricbosch View Post
Why am I in your signature.
CastIron is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 09:34 AM
  #22  
HigherGround
Descends Like Avalanche
 
HigherGround's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Somewhere between Funkytown and Margaritaville, PA
Posts: 5,769

Bikes: Lynskey R240, Sportive, and a Helix Sport disc model in the works; Eddy Merckx MX Leader; Specialized Rock Hopper Comp (1988!)

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Originally Posted by Garfield Cat View Post
A bike frame equipped to resist karate chops. Unless the martial artist is on drugs, he would not attempt to punch or kick into nails. A bike frame covered with nails.
You might want to allow a little extra standover clearance when sizing that frame.
__________________
The rider in my avatar is David Etxebarria, not me.
HigherGround is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 09:38 AM
  #23  
Kotts
Recreational Commuter
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Central Ohio
Posts: 1,023

Bikes: One brand-less build-up, and a Connondale Synapse Carbon Ultegra Disc. A nicer bike than I need, but it was a good deal, so... ;-)

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 7 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 4 Times in 2 Posts
+1 !!
Kotts is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 09:58 AM
  #24  
keisatsu
Eternal n00b
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Spokane WA
Posts: 914

Bikes: Giant OCR3, Marin Mount Vision, '94 Bontrager Racelite, Mirraco Blink

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 1 Time in 1 Post
Sounds like somebody just got done reading REAL Ultimate Power...

WIN!
keisatsu is offline  
Old 05-19-09, 10:04 AM
  #25  
Homebrew01
Super Moderator
 
Homebrew01's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Ffld Cnty Connecticut
Posts: 21,652

Bikes: Old Steelies I made, Old Cannondales

Mentioned: 10 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1066 Post(s)
Liked 496 Times in 359 Posts
Originally Posted by recursive View Post
I miss ryanf.
There seem to be plenty of posters making up for his absence.
__________________
Bikes: Old steel race bikes, old Cannondale race bikes, less old Cannondale race bike, crappy old mtn bike.

FYI: https://www.bikeforums.net/forum-sugg...ad-please.html
Homebrew01 is offline  

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information -

Copyright 2021 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.