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Dealling with my wifes concerns

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Dealling with my wifes concerns

Old 10-12-09, 10:25 PM
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Mash Master
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Dealling with my wifes concerns

Lately there have been so many stories of cyclist deaths that my wife has been getting more and more concerned. How have you explained to your wife that riding is safe when the right precautions are taken?
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Old 10-12-09, 10:30 PM
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I haven't. It's not, sorry.
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Old 10-12-09, 10:31 PM
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I told my wife that I'd rather die living than live dying.
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Old 10-12-09, 10:31 PM
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I didn't get married.
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Old 10-12-09, 10:35 PM
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You want me to talk to her?
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Old 10-12-09, 10:38 PM
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It's not safe. Anytime I or my SO go out, I know it's dangerous. But we'd rather live than not ride. When it's time to go, it's time. Whether creamed by a car, or in a car or ??
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Old 10-12-09, 10:45 PM
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Originally Posted by urbanknight View Post
I told my wife that I'd rather die living than live dying.
I didn't phrase it quite that melodramatically, but yeah: Something like, "You knew I was a cyclist when you married me, and you know I'm careful."
When our first child was born, I quit taking some of the chances i used to when i was young and foolish, but I got my wife interested in cycling (which I think IS reasonably safe if you're cautious--I don't buy the idea that we're all cheating death every time we coast down the driveway). She rode with me for a couple of years, even did a few centuries, before she lost interest and went back to running. When I go out now, though, she knows what it's like, and she knows I've ridden for 40 years without a major incident. She doesn't worry about it.
As for the number of stories about cycling deaths "lately," it's probably regional and seasonal. There haven't been any fatalities here in years, and this time of year there are still a lot of people riding, and some of them get caught out at dusk.
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Old 10-12-09, 10:47 PM
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Just tell her there's always risk. You can get nailed by a bus at an intersection on your way back from your lunch break. You could be driving to work and a bridge collapses. Hell, you could be typing up your TPS reports at your office and a plane hits you. You might as well go out doing something that you enjoy.
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Old 10-12-09, 10:53 PM
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This thread was not what I expected after a subject that started with "dealing with my wife".
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Old 10-12-09, 10:54 PM
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Mitigate the risk by riding smart. Also, get a huge life insurance policy, and make sure you have tons of medical coverage.
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Old 10-12-09, 11:01 PM
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As far as I can tell, the risk of riding is comparable, on an hourly basis, to the risk of driving.

You hear about cyclist deaths because they are UNcommon, not because they are common. If someone gets killed driving, that may or may not make the news because it happens all the time.
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Old 10-13-09, 12:20 AM
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point out that it drastically reduces your chances of dying of heart disease at age 55?
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Old 10-13-09, 12:22 AM
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Take her with you when you ride. She has a bicycle too ............... doesn't she???
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Old 10-13-09, 12:28 AM
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Originally Posted by rumatt View Post
This thread was not what I expected after a subject that started with "dealing with my wife".
I kept an open mind.

My wife occasionally used to mention how dangerous it was but I told her if I'm ever late, the most likely problem is I have a bunch of flat tires in a row. The onluy thing we can do is ensure we don't do anything dumb like overtaking lorries (tractor trailer you guys call them), beware of buses, and large vehicles that have difficulty seeing a cyclist. Slow down well before you reach the end of a down hil with a t-junction at the end.

What else can we do... just gotta be careful out there. I'm in UK, we have more and more dedicated cycling lanes but even then you have the odd bus driver (dork on yesterday's commute home) who may have had a bad day and wants to 'challenge superiority'... so let the guy go. Big deal. What's it gonna knock off you're training time/speed average.
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Old 10-13-09, 06:11 AM
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Well I am a Scuba Divemaster. I think cycling is safer than my old hobby of being 100 feet below the surface of a pitch black, ice cold lake surrounded by drowned trees.

Anyway, I have an ID on my wrist and a decent accidental death policy, so she's covered.
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Old 10-13-09, 06:26 AM
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Originally Posted by navyasw02 View Post
Just tell her there's always risk. You can get nailed by a bus at an intersection on your way back from your lunch break. You could be driving to work and a bridge collapses. Hell, you could be typing up your TPS reports at your office and a plane hits you. You might as well go out doing something that you enjoy.
Funny you mention a bridge, I was on the I-35W bridge in Minneapolis about 2 hours before it collapsed...it felt funny going over it too, kind of squirrley underneat the car. I had just gotten home when it went down. Sobering.

Oh, OP, to answer your question. My wife understands it's a semi-risky thing to do...so is my driving 26-30,000 miles a year in the Twin Cites for my job. I put my chances of dying in the car a lot higher than dying on the bike. But, to mitigate the risks:

- I always wear hi-vis. Fredly, but important to me.
- I travel quiet roads whenever possible.
- I always have a blinky with me on the rear, and if I will be out even cvlose to sunset, I have my Fenix flashlight.
- I try to ride smart, in traffic I act like a car rather than a bike. I take lanes when I feel the situation warrants.

Last edited by khatfull; 10-13-09 at 06:30 AM.
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Old 10-13-09, 06:33 AM
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Originally Posted by f4rrest View Post
I haven't. It's not, sorry.
this.
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Old 10-13-09, 06:34 AM
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Get a huge life insurance policy then she'll be pushing you out the door.
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Old 10-13-09, 06:59 AM
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Originally Posted by heavyMetal View Post
Mitigate the risk by riding smart. Also, get a huge life insurance policy, and make sure you have tons of medical coverage.
I was hit by a car about 4 1/2 yrs ago and sustained a broken back, leg and head injuries. At the time I was in a low paid manual job with no medical insurance. Fortunately here in Australia we have the Transport Accident Commission, (TAC), which covered all Ambulance, Hospital and rehab costs, paid 100% of my wages for the two yrs I was out of work and even paid me a small compensation sum at the end.
Without this we were in BIG trouble.

As for my wife worrying, she knows I'm careful, I'm just glad she doesn't see how fast I descend my local mountain climb!!
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Old 10-13-09, 07:03 AM
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Originally Posted by khatfull View Post
But, to mitigate the risks:

- I always wear hi-vis. Fredly, but important to me. (maybe not so much)
- I travel quiet roads whenever possible.
- I always have a blinky with me on the rear, and if I will be out even cvlose to sunset, I have my Fenix flashlight.
- I try to ride smart, in traffic I act like a car rather than a bike. I take lanes when I feel the situation warrants.
Most of this applies, but my wife knows I'd be a basket case if I didn't ride so...
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Old 10-13-09, 07:22 AM
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Originally Posted by substructure View Post
Get a huge life insurance policy then she'll be pushing you out the door.
This. The more zero's and the higher the first number in your death insurance payout the more accepting the wife seems to be to cycling. Odd how that works.
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Old 10-13-09, 07:34 AM
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Start being worried about her every time she goes somewhere in her car. Bring up every vehicular death in your region as evidence that she should stop driving.
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Old 10-13-09, 07:55 AM
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I don't even try and convince my wife that cycling is safe. My father was in such a bad cycling accident, about five years ago, the doctors thought he might never walk again. He can walk fine, but he never got back on his bike. And my niece, who lives in Denmark, just came out of a three day coma after a cycling accident. She may end up with some permanent paralysis.
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Old 10-13-09, 08:18 AM
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Originally Posted by urbanknight View Post
I told my wife that I'd rather die living than live dying.
+1, except I never have to explain this stuff to my wife. She embodies that principle as well as I do.

This season, someone was killed at the Driveway Thursday night crits. The state road races have been full of bad wrecks, and some of my team members have been injured. I wasn't racing, but I plan to next year. Incidents like that make me more nervous than they do my wife.

(She does occasionally remind me that even if I come home broken, I still have to tend to the kids and the chores.)
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Old 10-13-09, 08:19 AM
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Originally Posted by elader View Post
Well I am a Scuba Divemaster. I think cycling is safer than my old hobby of being 100 feet below the surface of a pitch black, ice cold lake surrounded by drowned trees.

Anyway, I have an ID on my wrist and a decent accidental death policy, so she's covered.
I was goose hunting one cold wintery morning and one of you guys came up out of the lake in front of me. wtf?

Buy a ticket to Cozumel the Caymans or Hawaii allready. (like I do when I want to dive)

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