Exactly, I'm neither a tourist or a club rider, I ride a road bike. (be it ancient and festooned with accessories of questionable necessity.) I ride on roads, with no great hope for the slightest shred of utility.

now look here. you do not get promoted out of the fred remedial class without suffering the initiation ceremony which includes a lot of pain and yelling. if you went through it you would know. so if you have to ask, yes you are scum. i mean fred. slip of the tongue. sorry.

Why is MTB Sport higher than Cat V when you have pro MTB below Pro Road racer?

hmm, I think this one is a MTBer....LET'S KICK HIS ASS AND GIVE HIM A SWIRLY!

somebody has to be the adult around here

Heading up and over a 500 foot hump on a main blvd in my car this morning, I passed a guy on a mnt bike, in bike clothes, carrying a backpack. I suspect he was on his way to work. I also suspect it was his first day trying out the new commute-by-bike plan. When I first saw him he was in a high gear and struggling to turn the pedals over on a gradient of about 5%. Then he shifted and his legs began flying around. Realizing he didn't need that low of a gear, he shifted again, back to a cadence that was painfully slow. I have a feeling he did that the entire way up the hill - shifting from one incorrect gear to another - which qualifies as Fred.

Fred knows how to shift gears. Fred will beat your ass up that hill every time. He was a poseur, not Fred.

Someone can just be a noob and not either a poseur or a fred...

that is the age of innocence before they get corrupted.

Very true.... I'm just pointing out that what most people refer to as Fred is usually something entirely different and not nearly as endearing.

And this is where the confusion and angst begins. By definition, a Fred is not restricted to those who can shift gears and outclimb anyone at will. Fredliness covers a wide spectrum, from the attire and equipment disadvantaged, to the practitioner of bizarre randomness of road etiquette, and the rare idiot savant that you describe. And if all else fails, make up your own standard to fit the moment, but do not restrict the definition.

The poseur, by contrast, has a more limited and precise standard - All show, no go.

Dunno about the courseware/final exam, etc.

I was out on a touring bike pulling a trailer the other day and rode up on a group who were all kitted out but actually going slower than molasses. They were riding doubled up on a Bike Path and I had to slow down behind them to allow someone coming the other way to pass. Finally, when the other lane cleared, they went to 3 abreast, still quite slow, until I announced, "on your left"; then they finally singled up.

These crazy people decided to call out "Go Fred, Go" as a group as I passed them at about a tailwind-assisted15mph, nothing fancy. I guess "Fred" is simply in the eye of the beholder.

Correct.

Fred has been known to ride the tailwind:

http://blog.makezine.com/thrust.jpg