Fredly aesthetics conundrum
 

It's cool and overcast today so I decided to just wear a short sleeve work shirt rather than a jersey for my commute (why needlessly add to the laundry). As I arrived, I realized I have an appointment in the middle of the day that I need to ride to that's about 5 miles away.

Temps on the return trip are forecast to be in the 80's and my office is on a substantial hill. The question is should I stink up my shirt in the afternoon or ride shirtless?

We have a washroom, I keep deodorant in the office (I usually have a spare shirt as well, but I forgot to replace it last time), and I have no appointments scheduled. I'll be on my 'bent if it matters.

Is this like one of those "people buy stock in me, and tell me how to live my life" forums?

I say go without the shirt, but some women tend to get offended by that, because they say it's not fair that guys can go shirtless, while they can't.

I'd argue that they can, but that's just me.

But anything goes in Portland, right?

I thought in Portland they can. I know for certain I've seen as much and I'm all about promoting fairness....

Since this is Portland, I would check microfiche archives for what people did in the 90's.

A jug of Axe Body Spray with the Windex style nozzle will fix everything. A Surly Big Dummy is the best way to carry this load.

If the chicks complain about unfairness, take the opportunity to also point out the fact that for men, a urinal is only a tree away. :D

If you are built like Jonny Bravo go sans shirt. If your sloppy joey wear said shirt

Shirt free, especially if you have grizzly bear-like back hair.

Shirtless is fine as long as you don't put tassels on your nipples.

So what did you end up doing? The masses want/need to know.

They can and do here.

says who?

The masses. I did some telephone polling over lunch.

And some men too. No one needs to be topless out there unless near a body of water, but if men are gonna do it, women should be too. It's about equality, my brethren. Saw a guy while I was out riding last week, mowing his lawn with his big ol' moobs hangin' low. No one needs to see that, and it was just so awful I had to run my eyes under water from my bottle to get the nasty out of them.

I wound up sporting the shirt. First of all, temps were lower than forecast so between most of the climb being in the shade and a breeze to help me keep cool, I figured that swamping out my shirt wouldn't be such a big problem.

More importantly, most of the people where I work are women. Those unable to resist the eye candy might throw themselves uncontrollably at me which would create a hazard. I climbed the hill without incident, washed up in the restroom, and quickly dried my shirt with my office fan.

Equality is not always a good thing.

Who here wants to see guys wearing form fitting clothes that reveal lots of skin at work? And if you think Speedos are bad, imagine these same guys in string bikinis.

I would go garbage bag over shirtless. It's Portland so it's gonna rain for sure, right?

Garbage bag? We recycle everything...

you are a bad bad man. now where is the eye bleach? Oh and stop wearing string bikinis.

are your pits really hairy? if so, keep the shirt on.