Pissed off singlespeeder.
 

Seems like all too often people want to give me advice and yell at me when I'm riding my bike. Today i was riding up to a light when someone behind me started honking and yelling at me to get out of the road. When i stopped they actually touched the rear of my tire with their bumper. I lost it totally, threw my bike down, started yelling, and when the dude got out of his car i was completely ready to kick both his ass and his friends ass. This to me was it, I mean who in the hell did this guy think he was?

Anyways, as i said i lost it, and based on the look on my face and the fact that when he wasn't in his car and we were both standing on the street he must have noticed i go 200 pounds and was only too happy to do the face dance on him.

He got back in his car and him and his friend left at top speed but it still pissed me off. Anyways, i came here to vent because,well, i figure you guys will let me rant.

k thanks.

As i was riding by a sign the said "No Bikes On the Sidewalk" as a dumbass hillbilly in a dualie deisel truck(empty bed, of course) told me that bikes don't belong on the road. Another *******, another scratch down the side of a vehicle, by way of my handlebars!! :D

anyone ride with knuckle dusters to scrape up any cars/cans that give you stick? I was tempted recently to make some adaptions to my normal riding gloves as I never have time to get my keys out

heh. funny you should mention that... i'd like to get a pair of these:


those are kevlar plates on the knuckles... too bad they're crazy expensive...

i ride with my cable lock around my wrist. Easy to either drag it across a car or cause big dents, or if i absolutely have to, hit a road rage possessed driver.

i ride with my mini u-lock in my back pocket. i've never had to use it though. usually if someone comes too close to me i smack their passenger sideview mirror with my hand...or i hit their hood or roof...another good tactic is the mule-kick to the headlight or front bumper.

Is that hard to do on a fixie?

I'd say that touching the rear of your tire is ASSAULT with a DEADLY WEAPON.
Did you get the plates? He did damage the wheel didn't he (wink,wink,nudge,nudge)?

I've had cars do illegial u-turns and run me off the road, cut me off on right turns and change lanes into me, and then yell at me because I politely (yeaah right!) pointed out how they caused me to almost make a mess in my shorts. I've found that my bar ends do a great job of detailing the paint of a car door and are great for removing side view mirrors. I removed a gentlemans mirror once after he decided to take my lane. I figured he didn't need something he never used.

I've read in a Triathlete Mag about attaching like a 20 inch curb feeler to each side of your bike with a screw attached to the end just for the cars that get too close. but i like the idea of the wolverine claw better. It only takes a few possessed cyclists with the wolverine claw to go ape s$% on some driver before drivers might be a little more attentive around us.

jeremy b

The problem with breaking the law or someones property is that i live in a relatively small city of about 300k people, if they have a cell phone the can just call the cops and stay in their car and follow me until the cops show. Plus i ride the same route day after day and not a lot of people ride where i live.

On the other hand, if the guy had come onto the sidewalk and started to attack me then i would have been legally able to defend myself. I'm not so sure that attacking his vehicle would have stood up in court even after he touched my tire.

They just need to bring back dueling so we can have a more polite society.

not at all. if you've got clipless pedals it's even easier because you can combine the disengaging and the kicking into one smooth motion. clips and straps make it a little harder...but it can be done.

i was talking to a guy who threw his bike through the front window of a bus once because the driver cut him off, and almost killed him, and then tried to chase him down and run him into the curb. he got in front of the bus, dismounted and used the momentum of the dismount to swing the bike up and into the windshield. he then pulled the bike out, locked it up, and made his delivery. when he came out the cops where there and he told them what happened. luckily, the bus passengers told the same story and i believe he got off without anything happening to him (except a broken derailluer hanger, he was riding a mountain bike). and the bus driver probably got fired...

GLOVE SLAP!!! BABY, GLOVE SLAP!!!!

I just wave at em. I take the high rode. Occasionally I'll ride up along side them at the light and politely point out thier mistake. Soometimes I get and apology. Resorting to physical damage of thier vehicle just lowers me to thier level. And I've come to the realization that in a battle between a 2 ton vehicle and a 250 lb biker, the biker will always lose. Tagging someones vehicle might just push them over the edge. And you might not be thier target next time out, but some innocent young kid.

Maybe I'm just a *****. But I'll use a blinkie light on the back, make sure I'm using appropriate hand signals, plan alternative routes. I don't bob and weave through traffic. I accept the fact that I'm a pedal driven vehicle in a combustion engine world. I ride defensively, as if every driver is a complete moron.

I'm older, I'm wiser. I value my life. Its not worth wasting over territorial disputes.

I have several stories like this. My favorite one is when some dink came up behind me in his car and pushed me as he passed. I don't know how i didn't fall but oh well. So I started to scream his plate number as loud as I could because I didn't think that he would be stupid enough to stop. Well stop he did and I just rode up and removed my little pocket lock and smashed out his passenger side window and hauled ass up a wrong way street. Maybe this wasn't the best choice but it's far to late now for that train of thought.

U lock does wonders for car paint

A-men, bro! :D

I did that to two stoners in a Cavalier. They were driving, almost ran me off of the road, i was literally two inches from the curb, and they were throwing pennies at me. At the next light, went up, dragged a handlebar across their paint and punched out their mirror. They were pissed and tried to follow, but i shot down a narrow alley, and into a parking lot, never to be seen again. I feel that actions have consequences, and theres no use trying to be polite to somone who isn't courtious to you. On the same note, if someone takes extra care to give me room as they pass, i will thank them if i see them at the next light. I am a jerk if they are a jerk, i am nice if the are nice.

Dink is a pretty rude term... choices, think wisely before you make them.

what censored word did you use? I've tried fitting in the big 7.

"Maybe I'm just a *****. But I'll use a blinkie light on the back, make sure I'm using appropriate hand signals, plan alternative routes. I don't bob and weave through traffic. I accept the fact that I'm a pedal driven vehicle in a combustion engine world. I ride defensively, as if every driver is a complete moron."

Nothing pisses drivers off more than giving the double thumbs-up

Dink is the word I decided to use.I happen to like that word.

Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary
Main Entry3: dink
Function: noun
Etymology: disparaging name for a Vietnamese

OK so I suck! Wonderful! Thats just peachey!

serious?

This has nothing to do with race. There is only one race. It's called adaptation. And what I mean by that is we are all from the same species of man, just differant natural conditions we have adapted in unique ways. blah blah blah blah!