I'm surprised to read that. I've never personally noticed behaviour like that on this forum, and yes while it is an anonymous internet forum where people can interact oddly sometimes, this place generally has many helpful, respectful people who enjoy discussing and sharing ideas.

I too did assume that the person asking the questions was a fellow, but I really don't see how it changed anything in expressing my opinions on the questions and topics.

https://cimg0.ibsrv.net/gimg/bikefor...188bf56021.jpg
as another example of real world, typical touring weights (ish) here is a photo of my wife on our recent trip. Her first self supported trip, so yes she took a bit too much stuff, but it wasnt over the top too much. She had two rear panniers and a handlebar bag, carried her own sleeping bag (a summer one, neither big nor small, nor heavy or light) campmat and The Usual Suspects of riding clothes, some off bike clothes, toiletry kit, a kindle, a cell phone, a point and shoot.....
Yes she could have cut out a bit, but all in all it was all stuff she used and was probably in the 25+ pound range. Sometimes extra food she wanted added some more weight, but bottom line that her choice of stuff, which I consider to be pretty typical, was in the range of what you are considering to take wyn.
I carried the tent, some extra stuff, the small campstove etc, but I just wanted to give you an example of how common this amount of stuff is.

The reality of going on your first self supported trip is that it will be with time on the trip that you will figure out what you really didnt need, what you would like to change, or add, and what things give you comfort or whatever and who cares if its another pound or two or whatever.
re clothes, only you know what works for you, ie what jersey, or socks or whatever, but generally its the old adage of layering, multi use and common sense for the temps you expect to encounter, and hopefully you have some outdoor experience to know what keeps you comfortable at a given temp.

Enjoy your prep, and you'll probably see also that in the first week or so, you may change where stuff goes, front , back , top of pannier, bottom, so that the bike handles better or just feels more stable, but thats part of being on your own and figuring out what works better.

cheers