Louis Le Tour

OK, so I'm riding along a "not so empty" road out in the middle of the Great Plains somewhere and my digestive system sends out the notice that it's down to download a brown file! Unless there's some wooded area or shrubbery a guy could end up really embare-assed! Does anybody carry some sort of biker's portapotty and cover up with a rain parka? Whatta ya do?

Machka 

Usually, I'm just slightly dehydrated on rides so this sort of situation has only ever happened to me once in the past 24 years of cycling.

digibud

good cup of coffee in the AM with breakfast and all's well in time. Like most folks I have toilet paper with me but if I were to take off for a long stretch knowing there was no possible break... I'd probably wait before leaving until I knew I was OK to go. Never had it happen and I would never carry a port a potty or anything like that...

staehpj1

It sounds like you are looking for things to worry about I have crossed the country a couple times and done other long tours and it has never been a problem. 90% of the time I even manage to use indoor facilities. I guess if you really had to you could gain some level of privacy with a poncho.

gif4445

How tall is the grass? Seriously, a few years ago, on the BRAN ride through the Nebraska Sandhills, there was a guy about 25 feet off the road in the catchers position. The bluestem was about 2 1/2 feet tall so that helped. When you gotta go, you gotta go I guess.

LordMarv

Plenty of long stretches out in the western/mid-western states that are without ANY trees or bushes, just low scrub...best you can hope for is a ravine or gully....and best keep your eyes peeled for rattlers while you're at it.

downtube42

Emergencies can happen, and when they do vanity becomes less important than other considerations.

djb

do we all carry Portapotties? sure we do, ever since I got my carbon fibre one, I've dropped 35lbs from my Portapotty weight alone, nothing to sneeze at!
(its also waaay more aero than my old fibreglass one, so I no longer have those moments after high winds of finding myself in Munchkin Land)

andrewclaus

I've never chalked it up to dehydration, but this is my experience as well if you change "once" to "never" and add a decade. I credit the healthy daily regimen of good exercise and good eating to my absolute regularity on tour. I know I'd better have a place to go right after my breakfast of a large bowl of oats, and I'm good for the day--it never fails out there.

Peeing is a different matter--it can get creative.

J.C. Koto

Maybe something like this:


plus this:


Yep. Would not arouse any suspicion at all.

indyfabz

ND presented an issue for the women in my cross country group when it came to No. 1. They learned to take advantage of cover when there was some because you never knew when the next opportunity would present itself. Fortunately, traffic was very light to non-existent in many places.

In additon to ravines and gullies, look for bridges.

Tourist in MSN

If there is a drainage ditch along side the road like almost all roads have, a bike with four panniers on a kickstand in the ditch will likely provide good visual cover. If it really is an event that can't be delayed, it will likely be over in a very short time.

And if hiding behind the bike is not practical, you probably will not know any of the people that drive past and it is unlikely that they will stop to get to know you.

Louis Le Tour

OK, good info. I'm sure it's a matter that I'm too concerned about, I just don't want to leave too many stones unturned being a rookie and all.

WonderMonkey

Do you happen to have a hitch on your bike?

Machka 

And turning stones is exactly what you'll have to do if the need strikes in the middle of nowhere ... turn some stones, dig a hole, squat ...

imi

Yeah, but remember creepy crawly bity stingy nasty things live under rocks

Walter S

I'm blessed with extreme regularity. Within a couple minutes of my first sips of morning coffee, downloading brown as you say is done for the next 24. Get between me and my hole at that moment and there will be words or a messy outcome. Otherwise it's all #2 for the rest of the day.

Walter S

Ha! Too funny!

saddlesores

i believe this is what you're looking for:

https://thegreensource.files.wordpres.../sdc112393.jpg

this sorta thing happens. i was riding through henan province last summer, stopped
for noodles at a less than sanitary road-side stand, it didn't end well.

being china, with 1.3 gazillion people, there's not much empty space. people are
everywhere. sure the locals just squat and poop in the rice paddies while working,
but a 6-foot foreigner (wearing bright red jersey) would tend to attract attention.

made it ten minutes on the bike getting desperater and desperater, with pressure
building for a massive eruption of "ole faithful." in the end (haha), found a small
pile (haha) of gravel, maybe 2' high, on the side of the road. set the bike on the
kickstand, squatted, and sorta hoped any passers-by would assume i was fiddling
with the wheels or gears.

Vintage_Cyclist

Slap a tire boot on yer balloon knot until the next pit stop!

fietsbob

Dig a Latrine, Use your entrenching tool, soldier ..

you dont have to lower a Kilt in those situations ..

SparkyGA

Drop your pants and go. Fertilize the earth The corn will thank you.

Though one time in Australia I was doing the deed in a farmers field that was a bit on the open side and some locals called the police on me after seeing my bike on the side of the road. Police 'investigated" me while I was wiping… HAHA.

Machka 

Here you go ... a blog that recently appeared on the MEC site ...
How to S#&t in the Woods? the Leave No Trace Way | MEC Blog

Louis Le Tour

That looks promising, thank you.

Doug64

Good advice, and an informative site.

In thousands of mile of touring it has never been an issue.

Many of the mountains that I have got permits to climb require packing "it" out as a condition of the permit. It is affectionately called the "blue bag" system, even though all the bags are not blue anymore. Yep, just double bag it up and pack it out.

The bags even come with instructions. A small amount of cat litter in each bag makes the task easier.


While I have pictures a a lot of things, I don't have one of a blue bag in use--sorry