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11-24-10, 07:29 AM
sittin' in
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'tis the season
11-24-10, 07:34 AM
Senior Member
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11-24-10, 07:42 AM
coffee-stained punk
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damn, all the break-up stuff is terrible...but like g, edr, and a lot of you, 'been there done that'...my ex wife left me without so much as a hint or days notice. No fights, arguments, nothing. 12 yrs and like a light switch it was over. Its almost embarrassing to recall how bad it hurt and how hard it was for me to deal with it.
Theres nothing anyone can say or do to make things better for you right now, but I promise you everything will be ok. Its just a matter of time. And take comfort in your family and friends.
Theres nothing anyone can say or do to make things better for you right now, but I promise you everything will be ok. Its just a matter of time. And take comfort in your family and friends.
11-24-10, 07:48 AM
Banned.
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11-24-10, 07:49 AM
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11-24-10, 07:53 AM
Senior Member
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When my first wife and I split up I went into a very very dark place, it was on the heals of my father passing away and my mom died soon after. One night I stood on a cliff on the coast near San Luis Obispo where I was living at the time and thought ef it I'm done. For some reason, probably cowardliness, I didn't jump. Instead I became very good friends with Glenlivet. We hung out for several years until my colitis nearly killed me and I had to pretty much stop drinking.
I really didn't give a sh it during that time, I was incredibly lonely but after the near death thing with colitis I decided to quit with the self pity and like myself again. Things got much better after that. I met my current wife and we have two great kids. Our marriage has been tested a few times over the past 11 years...we came close to splitting up in 07, I felt a lot of what you are feeling Sub. She only saw my flaws and couldn't see anything that was good in me. There are other issues, on her side that I wont get into but in her head it was all me.
I told her I was moving back to Cali and I'd like her and the kids to come but if she didn't want to then so be it...but I'm going. She came and thing got a little better. But honestly it's only been in the last year or so that things started to really turn to the good. Had it not been for our girls there is little doubt in my mind that we would have split up. Both of us felt then, as we do now, that we needed to suck it up for them.
Kids change the equation. They need their parents, and if you think there is even the slightest chance you can fix this marriage do it.
I really didn't give a sh it during that time, I was incredibly lonely but after the near death thing with colitis I decided to quit with the self pity and like myself again. Things got much better after that. I met my current wife and we have two great kids. Our marriage has been tested a few times over the past 11 years...we came close to splitting up in 07, I felt a lot of what you are feeling Sub. She only saw my flaws and couldn't see anything that was good in me. There are other issues, on her side that I wont get into but in her head it was all me.
I told her I was moving back to Cali and I'd like her and the kids to come but if she didn't want to then so be it...but I'm going. She came and thing got a little better. But honestly it's only been in the last year or so that things started to really turn to the good. Had it not been for our girls there is little doubt in my mind that we would have split up. Both of us felt then, as we do now, that we needed to suck it up for them.
Kids change the equation. They need their parents, and if you think there is even the slightest chance you can fix this marriage do it.
Life is really effing trying at times, hang in there folks. I know it's easier said then done, but hang in there.
11-24-10, 07:58 AM
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11-24-10, 08:17 AM
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Divorce sucks. Robin Williams said it is "close to death" and I think we do die a little when it happens, (some of us, anyway).
11-24-10, 08:18 AM
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11-24-10, 08:28 AM
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11-24-10, 08:30 AM
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just trying to add some levity.
11-24-10, 08:36 AM
pan y agua
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I'd exhaust every possiblity to turn things around, before you divorce. (of course you may have already done that.)
Whatever you decide, good luck.
__________________
You could fall off a cliff and die.
You could get lost and die.
You could hit a tree and die.
OR YOU COULD STAY HOME AND FALL OFF THE COUCH AND DIE.
You could fall off a cliff and die.
You could get lost and die.
You could hit a tree and die.
OR YOU COULD STAY HOME AND FALL OFF THE COUCH AND DIE.
11-24-10, 08:37 AM
Bulldozer
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11-24-10, 08:39 AM
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11-24-10, 08:46 AM
My idea of fun
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It's been windy here lately too. 15-20 fairly regularly. While I hate pacing myself against the gusts, side from the wind, the weather has been so gorgeous that I can't bear the thought of going inside.
11-24-10, 08:48 AM
Banned
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Wow this thread got depressing overnight.
I hope everyone's relationships turn out ok.
Grumpy, I like your new sig.
I hope everyone's relationships turn out ok.
Grumpy, I like your new sig.
11-24-10, 09:08 AM
going roundy round
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11-24-10, 09:11 AM
stole your bike
Sorry to hear. For what it's worth the best thing I've learned about relationships is having the awareness to know when you reach the impasses that cannot be overcome. I think of the relationships I fought for and the writing was always on the wall that they were beyond repair; those signs being the repetitive breaking up/getting back together but not because we resolved our issues but because we did not want to relinquish the security of being with someone.
__________________
I like pie
I like pie
Last edited by roadiejorge; 11-24-10 at 09:15 AM.
11-24-10, 09:18 AM
Elite Fred
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Reading all of this reminds me just how lucky I am. Best of luck to everyone.
11-24-10, 09:21 AM
Banned.
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I rode outside on the Veloway...it's pretty protected from the wind...like you the last few days we've had great temps and today is no exception..cold front rolls in tomorrow and we are in for freezing AM temps over the weekend.
11-24-10, 09:22 AM
Banned.
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11-24-10, 09:23 AM
.
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have been fighting off the symptoms of cold/flu the past few days.
trying to decide if some roller action is on the cards for this evening, or a run.
trying to decide if some roller action is on the cards for this evening, or a run.