Currently what I do is I spot skinny, decked out triathletes on my way to campus with their aerospokes and skinsuits (and yeah, heart rate monitors) and I reel 'em in and drop them on climbs, smiling the whole time and occasionally singing.

What they don't know is my 250 pound ass is sporting a jersey beneath the hoodie, my jeans are 5% spandex, and I've got a chamois on.