Actually, I was just joking about that.

As for the rest of your post, that's exactly what I say when I play devil's advocate for discussions and debates. Personally, I don't mind any "alternative" as long as it doesn't include a victim. In other words, if you want to participate in beastiality, go right ahead. Just make darn sure the animal is consenting. Of course, I agree that a child can not give consent since s/he probably does not know the full extent of his/her actions, and the same might apply for some animals. Other than that, live and let live. My life has yet to be damaged by a person being gay. If it's immoral (just like shaving and eating shrimp if you go by Leviticus), God will sort it all out in the afterlife.