I smoked for about 20 years until I "quit" last March. It's been a little over 13 months for me now. I say "quit" because it seems like everyone who "quits" ends up smoking again, sometimes 5 or 10 years later. I'm thinking of it like this: I'm just trying to see how long I can go between cigarettes. That said, I hope I never smoke again. There were a lot of reasons that I didn't enjoy smoking anymore, one of which that it is impossible to get good tobacco in the U.S. anymore (I had been a rolly guy for years). The second reason, and this is reinforced to me almost every day, is how terrible people smell after smoking. I never noticed it on myself while I was smoking, but man it is horrid.

I battled and tried to quit off and on over the last 5 years. I tried the patch, gum, zoloft, lozenges etc but all of those (with the exception of zoloft) keep nicotine in the blood, thus keeping you addicted, thus making it much harder IMO to get away. The hardest part, though, is the mind. Man, over the last 5 years everytime I would try to quit I would go through this mental agony where I would just obsess over smoking until I was practically crazy. I would smoke just to quiet my brain. I would give in when that incessant nagging would start, it beat me every time. It got depressing after a while. This last time was really no different, except I didn't smoke. The nagging was still there, the feeling of being hopelessly addicted, that I could never get away, still there. I just didn't smoke. In fact, there were numerous times when I decided to smoke, mentally giving in to the noise in my head, but it would almost vanish, like fog when the sun rises. It was weird. It happened for way longer than I thought it would, it was pretty touch and go for about the first 9 months. It was the hardest thing I've ever done to this point; though lately I rarely feel tempted or have any urges. Some days I actually feel like a non-smoker. It's a good feeling. I didn't use anything, this time. No pills, patches, powders or potions. I just didn't smoke.

As for how it affected my cycling, honestly, I don't think it made that big of a difference initially. In fact the first couple months off of smoking I was often short of breath. I also gained about 20 pounds. This didn't make me any faster. What I notice now is that my smoker friends, who were about as fast as me when I was smoking, have all since gotten really slow since I quit smoking. They say that cycling doesn't get easier, you just get faster. Well, I can say now that quitting smoking did make it a little easier in addition to making me a little faster. I'm slowly working off that 20 lbs too. Slowwwwly.

The most important thing is to not quit quitting. You'll probably fail. You'll probably fail several times. This **** is evil. It will take time, and practice. Don't get too down on yourself, and if you have to smoke, at least try and enjoy it. Then, when you feel like you're ready to give it another try, try. Try a different method. Try them all. Just keep trying. If I can do it, anyone can.