My wife's father died last August, and his final year was hell on everyone, particularly since he had previously been a fiercely independent, self-reliant sort, which is one reason we always got along so well. My mother died relatively young (age 66 in a family tree of nonagenarians) and spent her final 6 years in a very good board-and-care assisted living facility, as her MS gradually worsened.

My best advice to any caregiver is to avoid burnout. Everything you need to know you can learn from an airline flight attendant: "When traveling with a child [or elderly parent], put your own oxygen mask on first, before helping him/her with his/hers." If your own oxygen mask is not securely fastened, you are no good to anyone else.