Well, I went to Harris and rode a few bikes. They were actually quite pleasant and helpful, and let me go ride as long as I wanted. It was a worthwhile trip on many fronts. For one thing, I have a much better idea of what size bike is a good fit for me. And that my current bike, as I suspected, is not a good fit. I rode the test bikes altogether for a couple of hours and had no numbness in my hands, which is a problem with my Trek. Also: I found that I liked a moustache bar with bar-cons better than a road drop bar with STI shifters. Also, a Rivendell is really quite nice. Not exactly what I was looking for, but still. I tried a Gunnar Fastlane, which would definitely be a stretch budget-wise. And it is not as pretty as the Riv (no lugs, unicrown straight fork), but it really did make my Trek feel like a piece of crap in comparison. The Surly felt a little closer to home in that respect.
Now I have another conundrum. Now I am seriously considering a Koga-Miyata. They offer a lugged steel frame with disc tabs that spec-wise seems to offer just about everything I'm looking for. It wouldn't be cheap, but I can get it configured in a way that would get me more or less what I want component-wise and not completely blow my budget. I know they have a good rep for well built bikes. But I probably won't be able to get a test ride, and the US distributor says Friday is the last day to get an order in before Europe goes on summer vacation. What to do!