No, I am far from perfect. Gawd Knows> But why put some lame-ass worse-than-black-velvet-elvis on seemingly unblemished skin. It ain't pretty.

Here is a good reason:

Larry the accountant gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, "Where in the hell have you been?" Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo." "A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?" "I got a $50 bill on my privates," he said proudly. "What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head in disdain. "Why on earth would an accountant get a $50 bill tattooed on his privates?" "Well, for one...I like to watch my money grow."Two...once in a while I like to play with my money. "Three...I like how money feels in my hand. "And, lastly...instead of you going out wasting money on shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow $50 anytime you want."

Larry is recovering nicely in the hospital...