I know bedbugs are no laughing matter, but my grandfather used to tell a funny story that I was just reminded of.
I'm sure that this is just urban legend, but here goes.
When he was a young man, early in the 20th century, he worked in a lumber camp. One of his co-workers was an obnoxious Brit who could never be impressed by the size of anything.
We got em bigger'n 'at over 'ome was his usual retort.
Story goes, one night they slipped a snapping turtle in his bed. He jumped out of bed faster than he got in, yelling, "what is that?" or words to that effect.
"It's a bedbug. Gottem bigger'n 'at over 'ome?"
With apologies to our British friends.