I was stationed at MCAS k-Bay in the mid 80s and used to come in from Kailua pretty messed up on my bright white single speed fat tire. One night the boys at the gate told me to get off the bike and walk to the barracks, all of about 250 yards away. Not me, not that night, I got up and rode off for ten feet and then fell down into the retention pond. When I climbed back up to the top they were laughing pretty hard and put my bike in the back of a cruiser and one of them dropped me off.

In fort Collins one night I got pulled over while holding onto the back of a train that goes through town after leaving the bar. It was going my way . The cop got me on the side of the road and then started telling me the story that he was the first officer on the scene when a college girl had done something similar except she had grabbed on in the middle of the train and had fallen off and had her legs cut off. Then he just started sobbing. It was very surreal and I didn't argue that I was on the back of the train, I think the fine was like 60 bucks.