I think your problems were mostly caused by the short distance of the ride. 40-60 miles and you'd probably have been tired enough to crawl in that bag, read a few minutes, and drop right off. That'll do it for me every time. OTOH, some are just too cold natured for winter touring. Got a buddy who is.

Interesting, honest, humorous account of your experience. And very sensible move, calling for rescue. If it ain't fun, what's the point?