Hahaha Racer, that's hilarious!
I suck at TT's and your point about knowing when to do negative or positive splits is a good one...I have no clue or more on point guess I never gave it much thought. I'm assuming by a positive split you mean going above target power in the first half or third and so on? I guess I just always tried (without much success) not to fill my legs with lactic acid early on so as not to have to finish with blown out legs.