When I put my riding gear on, for just a minute, I feel like George Hincapie. Then I see myself in the mirror, and think, "Aw, crap."
I always wondered how I'd stack up against the pros. Then I saw a stage finish of the Giro last year in Italy, and realized that there are no limits to my suckness.
I have 2 Serottas that I bought on eBay. I tell people that they were custom made for me.
When I ride with my wife, I get pi$$ed off at her because she'll never come around and take a pull. I'm 6' and 225; she's 5' and 115.
Sometimes I snore so loud that I wake myself up. Sometimes when I open my eyes, I see my dog sitting on the bed, staring at me with his head cocked to one side, like, "WTF?"
I was late for the group ride this morning. I told the guys that it was because the kitchen clock had stopped. It was really because I was reading this thread on my iPad while I was pinching a loaf.