I'm a regular tourist. Most recently I did an 8-week tour of eastern Canada and the US, 2500 miles starting and finishing in Toronto.

I don't really understand your problem. You don't like riding in groups you don't know, you can afford to stay in hotels/motels, you want to ride on your own schedule and at your own pace. So why not just go on your own, book your own accommodation etc? That's what I do. Accommodation isn't difficult to find, and touring alone is great. It's amazing how many people you meet.