"bud16415" My theory is it's about "time" not "effort" with the wide gear selection I try and ride at a sustainable energy level and just understand it will take more time. What I have found the two quickest ways to kill yourself is expecting a certain time to get someplace or riding with a much stronger rider and trying to keep pace.
x2! That's what all those gears are for. Find an energy output level you can sustain and use your gears, don't get frustrated by continually checking your speed. Most seasoned riders have gone through your experience and frustration, don't fight it. I learned this lesson while riding alongside Klahanni Lake. A very long lake in a narrow valley with very few natural windbreaks. Some of the headwind gusts actually stopped us in our tracks. My buddy and I stubbornly fought that wind for half a day before backing off and only using a sustainable energy. We actually took off our speedometers so we could concentrate on enjoying the scenery and the rest of the day without worrying about our progress.