Saw one in Dublin a couple of months back. Wife and I were in Ireland for 2 weeks. We dropped the car rental off and then waited for a taxi to take us to the hotel. Taxi spots my hand, pulls in sharply and just touches an older guy riding past. He falls off, taxi driver gets out - and then it's WW3!

Taxi driver apologises, rider climbs into him "You fookin' basstard, look what you done to me fookin' bike, Jaysus, I should punch you fookin' face in you fookin' stoopid fookin' git!" and so it went on. Rider picks up his bike, smashes it into the taxi door, and then drags it down the length of car scratching it badly. "Take that you fookin' basstard.". Taxi driver yells he's going to call the police. By now a crowd are gathering. Rider yells, "What you fookin' lot looking at?" A few in the crowd, tell him to "Fook orf! Don't you use that fookin' language in front of the kids".

Wife and I take our cases, and dissolve into the group and move down road about 50m and hail another cab. Last thing we wanted was to get implicated in a 'fookin' murder. Honest, this is a true story. It needs the Oirish accent to make it funnier.