I want my bike to look like "that ugly thing the guy who's nuts rides" so nobody else will want it! Mismatched fork and frame (dorky / style points!), racks, old duct tape wrapped around top tube, handlebar bag mount, mismatched water bottle cages, wired computer (with cadence for extra wire runs).

The rest of my customization is functional. Dyno hub and lights, extra blinkies, frame pump, wide tires, B-17 saddle, saddle bag with spare tube, patch kit, multi-tool and wrench.

Oh, the fancy bike doesn't see bike racks except as it's ridden past them.