And great minds in Arizona, no less.

Experimental theatres are typically in areas that I would be pretty uncomfortable leaving my bike. I know there are plenty of tweakers near the experimental theatres in downtown Phoenix that would think nothing of jacking a bike or ten. Besides a guard, I would want something heavy duty that I could personally lock to. If you don't have a rack, maybe you could make a temporary one. I'm thinking two buckets of concrete with a long chain in between, or a chain or cable anchored to a wall. Just something that will keep the bike where I left it.