Pitching BD to someone who freely admits that they know nothing about bikes, is having difficulty sorting out what kind of frame geometry works for him- even through test rides, AND has stated they aren't interested in buying from an online vendor for this all important first purchase??

tohtruck- you've been given some good advice on these boards. Allow me to offer up another tip. Find a LBS that gives you a warm and fuzzy when you talk to them and then listen and purchase from them. Will it be the perfect bike? Probably not, but at least it will get you on the bike- where you'll start learning things about your style, wants/needs, a lot quicker than posting here ever will.