HAHAHA the classic 'I know I am but what are you defense" Well Played sir.
To answer your question I have ridden 29" bikes. I just don't feel like I have enough saddle time on one to tell someone to buy or not to buy one. The first one I rode was back in 02-03 when one of my buddies bought a Fisher hardtail a few months after they were introduced. I didn't like it for a few reasons. First of which is the trails I tried it on are definately better suited to 26" wheels, they were tight twisty choose your line technical type trails, all of which are where the 29 is lacking. I also prefered my FS over my hardtial on those trails. So I'm not sure if the reason I really didn't like it was because it was a 29 or that it was a hardtail. Either way I wasn't impressed and stayed clear for a few years.
Fast forward through the years and my goddaughters father buys a FS Fisher. So I borrowed that a few times when I lived in Florida. It was a size too small for me but I still gave it a shot. The trails there were definately made for 29". They had a lot of roll and flow and I could easily see that in certain types of trails a 29 does roll easier. I wont say it's faster because I never really rode those trails enough on both his bike and my bike to make a good comparison, plus his bike was a Med and I ride a XL.
Now I'm up in the PA/DE/MD corner and I see these bikes in/out the shop all the time. Occasionally I run into a guy I know and he'll offer to let me take a quick spin but there's never been anything significant enough to make a judgement or a comparison until this morning. Which is funny you typed that because I was riding this morning with my neighbor and I ran into a customer I know. A few weeks ago he bought a Salsa Spearfish but wanted to watch as it was assembled. So while I built his bike we got to talking and he offered to let me ride it if I wanted. I didn't take him serious, I just figured he was really excited to be having his new bike built and was just being nice to the guy who was building it. Well this morning we run into and he said "hey wanna try it". I immediately jumped on the chance especially since he runs Time Atacs as I do and it's the right size. I also wanted to boogie down the trail before he got a chance to size me up and say hmm aren't you a clyde? LOL
Well I immediately turned around and re-ran the section of trail I had just done on my Ellsworth and again I have to say there are sections where it feels easier to maintain speed and roll on a 29" and there are sections that I can clear with difficulty on my 26" that I had even more difficulty today and just unclipped so that I wouldn't risk boffing on his fairly new bike.
So in the end my experience is limited compared to guys who actually own them but even then I think that unless someone has ridden both on the same trails and can make a true comparison any input is jaded by what they think and not what they know. That's why I always grill the few guys who come in that do actually own both and even got some to let me sneak a look at HR numbers and average speeds. I'm still not entirely sure which way I will go and depending on the day you ask I will bounce between the top contenders (Turner 5 spot, Turner Flux, Santa Cruz Carbon Tallboy, Blur Carbon LT). We don't do enough volume to rate a Demo but there is a shop 1.5 hours away that will rent Santa Cruz's and I've been thinking of going up there and renting one for a week this way I can get a real side by side comparison before I drop a good amount of scratch.