Superdex, when I read this yesterday morning I was laughing so hard my eyes were tearing. I wasn't laughing at you, but at myself for the times that the exact same things and feelings happened!
Hope you go back; I did and it was worth every gut wrenching pain that went through my body.
Hip, I agree with what you say. If you are out there for the Zen and ture, no one has a right to tell you that you should go faster. Thing is, if you go out and ride 18, day in and day out, you will never ride anything but 18. There is a certain sense of accomplisment the day you come in at 19 or do a century at 20.
Rhumb