Nice piece. I particularly got a chuckle out of this:
I get annoyed with people who bought a bicycle three weeks ago and now present it to me as if they've discovered the cure for all society's ills. I know what they're good for, and what they're not good for. Among the latter is carrying a new refrigerator. Unless you're Chinese.
A few years back, I purchased a five-foot long freezer at the local Sears. It fit quite nicely into a borrowed cargo trailer (I have since purchased an identical trailer.) and a friendly Sears employee helped me load up. I never realized I'm Chinese, but it sounds like a nice compliment.