I think a lot of it has to do with my dad as well though. I was just gaining a bit of confidence this past week but then when my dad talks to me about the race he just talks about everything that makes me nervous and tells me things like "you have to keep up this race". Then all of the bad thoughts come rushing back to me. I'm not the sort of person that likes to talk about a race at all before the whistle even blows. The less I think about it, the more confidence I can gain but that never works my way. Couple that with getting dropped all the time, it's just so hard to go into a race positively. I'm just going to work like hell next year, plan everything out, hopefully have a better bike, maybe a PM, nutrition plan and just do things right! I've never had to work to be good at sports in my life, but that's all catching up to me now. I'll never know for sure what went wrong this year but I can hopefully change next year.