Before every ride, I obsessively check my local online weather page, over and over even though it only updates once per hour.

I have 150$ pedals, on my 300$ bike.

I am pretty slim, but am always wishing I could drop a bit more body-fat. I also unfortunately bake once a week or so, and devour an entire cake/batch of cookies in 2-3 days.

After my first season of harsh Minnesota winter biking, I feel vastly superior to those who have just started biking for the season.

I treat all-way stop signs as if they are invisible, and don't pay enough attention to stoplights.

As a high school student, I'm always thinking about picking up a job to generate money for more shiny biking gear, but always end up chickening out.

I feel a deep aggressive need to pass anyone, no matter what bike they are on, how old they are, how fast they are going, ect.

I find female cyclists significantly more attractive than if they weren't on a bicycle, and yearn to meet a female cyclist my age but can't bring myself to make any effort into establishing contact with one.